Section One: Assets and Debt Use this section to explain your current financial picture at large.
Retirement Balance: $0 (I can’t contribute until March)
Equity if you're a homeowner: My boyfriend, H, and I just bought a house! We close on Feb 5th, but don’t take possession until March 15th. But our home was appraised at $270,000, we paid $267,000. Our downpayment is 20% and H’s parents gave us $46,000 for that and closing costs. I have put forth $10,000 from my investment account (see below) and H has contributed $7,000 and will pay for a chunk of the repairs needed before we move in.
Savings account balance: $5,000
Checking account balance: $1,200 (I try not to ever let this go under $1,000)
Credit card debt: $300 (This is gas/some grocery expenses that will be paid at the end of the month)
Student loan debt: $10,500 for a BBA in general business. I am reeeeeally hoping Biden is going to forgive this, as I have almost exactly $10,000 left to pay. My grandparents paid for most of my degree until my last 5 semesters because I changed schools. I had been going to my grandfather’s alma mater and changed schools with 5 semesters left, going full time all semesters.
Mutual fund: ~$6,500. This had $10,000 more but I used it for our down payment. This was opened for me by my grandparents, and my parents also contributed. I got ownership of this account the year I turned 21.
Section Two: Income
Main Job Monthly Take Home: $2,472
My boyfriend H makes $52,000/year, but we do not combine finances. We either split everything or Venmo each other. It typically evens out.
Section Three: Expenses
Rent / Mortgage / HOA fees: Currently our rent is $950 for just rent and we pay relative to paycheck (I pay $400). Our mortgage will be $1,200 and I will be paying $550
Renters / home owners insurance: We paid for a year of renters ($110) and will have to start paying home owners in March
Retirement contribution: I can’t contribute until March, but will start contributing 3%
Savings contribution: usually around $200-300
Investment contribution: Nothing now, will be after we get the expensive home things finished
Debt payments: Pay off CC monthly. Not paying off student loans until September, if I have to. Then will be paying $100
Donations: I volunteer with an animal rescue (am also a board member!)
Electric: H pays
Wifi/Cable/Landline: H pays
Cellphone: On my parents’ plan
Subscriptions: $15 for book of the month, and $60 every 6 weeks for our cats’ food through Chewy, $10 for Grubhub+, $10 for Disney+ and $5 for Spotify for students (they don’t know I graduated). H’s parents pay for Netflix and Amazon and we let them use our Disney and Hulu!
Pet expenses: See above, and $20 month for their insurance (for my half)
Car payment / insurance: My parents bought my car and pay my insurance
Friday:
7:15 am: Wake up for work. Make an iced coffee and get ready. Throw on Madewell jeans and a sweater and out the door by 7:35.
8:00: Arrive at work. Realize I have nothing to do today and internally freak out. This is my first job out of college and I’m really struggling with figuring it out. We are in the office, but my manager is working from home this week and my coworker, L, is in the office. They have different expectations of me and I’m completely overwhelmed. My coworker is a bit controlling, so she “assigns” me my work and I have a project that I can do in my free time. I feel like I’m wasting time by not actually doing any real work, but L is swamped and won’t delegate. During my first week I attempted to just start doing things that are my responsibility, but L freaked out, called my manager, who then told me that I can’t do anything until L assigns it to me, even though I was just doing things that are my responsibility.
12:30: Heat up lunch and chill on my phone. L is being quite verbal with how busy she is and makes an off hand comment about how she’s “so glad I’m here, but it’s like double the work having to check over someone else’s work and do your own.” I apologize for being new and she says that she can’t wait until I have free reign on things and I agree. I remind myself that I am still new and it is okay to make mistakes.
4:30: Finally done, call H on my way home. I tell him I am so glad it is Friday and I can’t wait to just relax tonight. When I get home I have a Diet Coke while H makes tempura cauliflower and potsticker soup.
7 pm: Amazon delivers a box of vitamins my mom ordered for me and I call her to thank her. H is on the phone with his mom, so we both chat with our respective moms for a few before we continue watching Netflix and chatting.
9 pm: I start getting tired but we decide to watch Lady Bird and hang on the couch with the cats. I doze off at 11 while H plays video games.
Money spent: $0
Saturday:
9:30: Wake up to coffee in bed supplied by H, who has been up since 7 am to watch a soccer game. I put the coffee on my nightstand and one of the cats instantly knocks it over, spilling it everywhere. I guess it’s time to get up?
10:30: Hop in the shower after milling around straightening the apartment. I am finding it so difficult to even want to organize here when I know we’re moving in a few weeks. We don’t have a possession date yet, because the current owners have not found a new house. We have a huge list of things we want/need to do to the house before moving in, so we will not move in on our possession date anyways. I throw in some laundry after my shower and H decides to make lunch.
12: We need to get out of our apartment, so we go drive by our house and check out our new local brewery. It is half a mile from the house and they have an outdoor beer deck, as restaurants in Michigan are closed to indoor dining. I get a sangria and H gets 2 beers and some fries for us to share. H pays.
1:00: We see that town a few minutes away has a whole street closed down where you can open carry alcohol and there are fires and food. We figure we will stop by and see how things look. Everyone is wearing masks (unless eating or drinking) and are social distancing, so H parks and we walk around. We stop for coffees first, I get a tea latte and H gets a coffee. ($8 with a tip).
1:30: After sitting down and hanging out drinking coffee we walk around downtown. Everyone has masks on and are social distancing and it is so nice to see. It is pretty cold out but most bars and restaurants have outdoor seating with heaters or fires. We pop into another brewery where H gets a ghost pepper beer and a spicy Crunchwrap for when we get home. H pays. On our way out we stop at our favorite cheese store and get a caramelized onion quiche, a goat cheese with red pepper and onion, some Tipperary Irish cheese and a triple cream Brie/blue cheese, I pay. ($26 with tip)
2:30: After sitting out by the fire my hair smells like smoke so I take another shower while H puts away the cheese and tidies around the living room. We share the crunch wrap and it is amazing. Today is cheat day, so we won’t work out tonight, but will tomorrow. Loaf around between loads of laundry and watching Pirates of the Caribbean.
8:00: Hungry again so we order Thai food from Grubhub. I get peanut curry noodles and H gets yellow curry and we split crab Rangoon. ($32, H pays half). H plays games online with some friends on Saturday nights so I make the bed, tidy up, and start some online shopping for the house. We currently have 1 b1 bath and our house is 4 b2.5 bath and I’m so overwhelmed! The current owners are taking all of the fixtures in all bathrooms (toilet paper holders, towel bars and hooks, etc) so those are things we need pretty quick after we move. I put some items in my cart at Anthropologie and Urban Outfitters, but don’t check out because I know there will be a sale soon.
10:30: The cats and I head to bed, H is staying up to watch the Connor McGregor fight. I do my night time skin routine of Lush’s 9-5, the Body Shop’s Oils of Life and Olay night cream and eye cream, brush my teeth and watch Bob’s Burgers until I pass out.
Total: $50
Sunday:
9:30 am: H wakes me up with coffee and asks if I want him to heat up the quiche from yesterday. He does that while I talk to my parents and cuddle the cats. We eat in bed and lounge until noon, when we decide to run to the grocery store and take our recycling and garbage. (Meijer trip: $26 for my half) We get onions, brussels, asparagus, potatoes, soup, crackers, rice, enchilada sauce, black beans, and other stuff I can’t remember.
1:00: On to target because our Meijer is never well stocked. We are able to get in and out in 15 minutes, which seems like it should be illegal. (My half: $13). We get some meatless crumbles and falafel, parchment paper and Valentine’s Day toys for the cats.
2:00: Home and the groceries are put away. I make a cheese board for H and I to snack on while we watch the Red Wings game.
3:00: I start cleaning the apartment while H watches football. I clean the sinks, the bathroom, vacuum and steam clean the floors while he scoops the litter box. While the floors dry, I take a nap on the couch with one of the cats. We do a popsugar workout when I wake up and then veg until dinner, talking and watching TV.
7:30: H makes brussel sprouts, asparagus, and rice for dinner while I finish up laundry. After dinner I shower and do my night time routine and out by 10.
Daily total: $39
Monday:
7:30: On way to work and the line at Starbucks is insane. I usually stop at Starbucks on Monday mornings but there is no way I can wait in line and still make it to work on time. I stop at the gas station next to work for my coffee ($1.50) and hope it doesn’t suck (spoiler: it did).
12:30: Lunch time! H texted me this morning that we will be able to take possession on our house sooner than we thought, so I make a list (one of many) of things we need to get done between closing and possession. Getting a little stressed about things we “need” vs “want” but I know it’ll work out. I eat an Annie’s Mac and cheese and look online for bathroom hardware.
4:30: H calls and tells me we need to figure out how to get a wire transfer receipt for the money I sent him for our down payment. On my way home I call my credit union, but they don’t offer receipts for wire transfers. I call H back and give him the confirmation number my CU gave me, and we hope that is good enough. When I get home we do another Pop Sugar workout video and order mexican food. We have some rewards from Grubhub, so our fajitas only cost us $4 (I pay).
6:00: Home, eat and relax. It is going to snow tonight so H reminds me to leave early in the morning for traffic. We do our nightly routines and I’m out by 10.
Total: $5.50
Tuesday:
7:30: Wake up to a ton of snow and icy roads. Thankfully H brushed my car off before I left, but it is still snowing and gross outside. We’re supposed to get another 6 inches today!
12:30: Lunch time! I heat up some mashed potatoes and call my credit union. We are still trying to get our lender proof that I gave H money for our mortgage and I’m getting frustrated. I give them permission to speak to H, and he gets it straightened out.
4:30: My boss calls me as I’m about to leave to tell me I can work from home Friday! When I got this job I was told I would be remote within a year, but from conversations with my boss it sounds like it could be a lot sooner. This was a huge reason we wanted to get a house, because I do really need an “office”, not just a desk in our bedroom. I call H on the way home and make him tell our cats I will be home with the all day Friday.
5:00: Home and my mom texts asking if I want anything from The Body Shop. She places an order and I get Aloe moisturizer, some make up remover, and a facial massager ($28, sent to my mom). I have been trying to get more into skin care lately and I’m so excited for the facial roller! My mom and I are super close and I miss her so much. We usually chat on the phone once a day, but it isn’t the same.
7:00: After dinner (soup and salad, made by H) I get the box my mom sent me. Mostly things I left at home for Christmas. H and I were not planning on going home for Christmas, but the week before there was a death in his family. We went home (2 hours away) with the cats, not knowing how long we would stay. We packed for 4 days, but ended up staying 3 weeks. Also included in the box was my tab renewal form. I decide to do it online, instead of going to the Secretary of State in person ($91.31, with fees for paying with a card). My car is in my mom’s name, so I have to update my tabs during her birth month, not my own.
9:30: Shower and get in bed. We watch the Simpsons until we fall asleep.
Total: $119.30
Wednesday:
7:15: Wake up and get dressed. I have extra time this morning, so I stop at Starbucks and get a Carmel macchiato ($5). I get into work and my boss calls to let me know my laptop bag was delivered, so I grab that from the receptionist. Since I’ll be working from home Friday I make sure my laptop, mouse, and charger all fit in the bag.
12:30: H Venmo requests me $65 for utilities this month. I didn’t pay for rent from August-December, so I tell him I will pay half of our utilities for a few months. I was furloughed from my retail job March-June, and then I was collecting underemployment June-August. I got COVID in July, and quit my job in August, due to being asked to work while being sick with CIVID. Because I stopped receiving unemployment at that point, H agreed to let me stop paying rent. I really appreciate this, it allowed me to not have to get a job for my last semester, and truly focus on school and getting an after graduation job. I place a pick up order for Target to grab on my way home from work. I get pita bread and snacks for work ($11).
4:30: Leave work, stop at Target for Drive Up. I also stop at Sam’s Club for gas ($18.40) When I get home, H and I do a popsugar work out. He makes dinner (falafel, rice, pita and salad) while I fold towels, pick up a bit and chat with my mom. I also text a few friends I haven’t talked to lately. In bed by 9, after a shower and skin care routine.
Total: $94.40
Thursday:
7:30: Up and out the door. At work, my boss asks what I want for lunch so I order a wrap from Applebees (she pays) and my coworker, boss and I eat in a conference room. We discuss how I’m doing and they let me know I will be able to work from home by my 90 day point (!!!!). They also explain that another coworker, who isn’t in my department but was hired in the same day as me, was let go last week due to misaligned expectations. They ask how I’m feeling, and I am honest and explain that I feel a little overwhelmed and like I’m not doing a good job. They both reassure me and it ends up being a great talk.
2:30: My mom texts and asks if I think my niece would like an Amazon tablet and I say yes. I do a pickup for one at the target near my mom, so she can use my red card discount and drive up. ($105, but my mom will Venmo me when she decides if she will keep it)
4:30: Grab my laptop and leave work! I stop at Marshall’s to get a new cat dish, and also some soap dispensers for the house. Wouldn’t be a marshalls trip without buying something that I don’t really need but I walk out with an entry way bench anyways. ($108) I chat on the phone with my mom and friend while shopping and then go get my dip powder taken off my nails ($10). Super bummed I’m not going to be doing dip for the time being but it is an unnecessary expense right now, and I’ll be working remote more with no one looking at my nails.
7:00: H gets home from guitar lessons and we talk about moving. This leads to a fight about realistic expectations of moving, cleaning old apartment, and what happened last time we moved. We both agree that there’s no use fighting until we know all the facts and H makes dinner.
9:30: H does the dishes while I get ready for bed and we get into bed. Asleep by 10, excited to WFH tomorrow!
Total: $223
Week total: $531.20
Food + Drink: $110.50
Fun / Entertainment: $0
Home + Health: $108
Clothes + Beauty: $28
Transport: $109.71
Other: $65
Reflection: This is an atypical week for spending. H and I definitely order a ton of take out, and that’s typical, but I haven’t been shopping as much lately. Saving up for housing expenses has been pretty stressful for me, I really want to get the big stuff out of the way before buying furniture. In case anyone is wondering about our house buying process, I will outline briefly below:
In November 2020, H’s parents offered to help us with a down payment, as we were having a tough time finding any homes in our budget. We met with a lender, who approved us for way more than we planned on spending. The market in Grand Rapids is hot. We put an offer in on another house, $30k over asking, we had done an inspection before our offer, and offered an appraisal gap of $5k. The winning offer was $70k over asking, in cash, no appraisal or inspection. We were devastated, it was truly our dream home. This was right before Christmas, and H had lost a family member that week. We agreed to take a break from looking at houses. January 3rd, I found our house on a Zillow email. We called our agent and he told us that there was already an offer in, who asked the owners to stop showing the house. It had been on market for 6 hours. Our agent was able to get us in that night, but told us if we wanted it we needed to make an offer that night. We agreed to offer $15k over, with an escalation clause of $20k over, $3k appraisal gap, and 40 days between acceptance and possession, as the current owners needed to find a house. There was another offer that was $1k over our initial, but under our escalation clause maximum, so our offer won! We found out we got the house on a Thursday, and our inspection was that Saturday. This was January 9, and the inspection didn’t find any major issues with the house, save for the 24 year old water heater and furnace. We asked the sellers for a 1 year home warranty, which they agreed to. They also offered us their washer and dryer (5years old, LG) for $500. We agreed and our all in was $268,500. It was really important to H’s parents that we put 20% down so we didn’t have to deal with PMI, so our down payment was $56,000. Closing costs will be $7,000. We will need to paint, add gutters, have a handy man and electrician do small jobs, and update the master bedroom carpet.

NOTE: All currency has been converted to USD (1 PHP = 0.021 USD)
Intro: I hope this gives people an idea of what life is like on the other side of the world, in the Philippines. I’ve also included Ref29’s questions at the beginning to give you more insight into my background. Please know that writing this turned out to be much harder than I had originally anticipated since it forced me to confront several things about me, particularly about my mental health and my privilege. I’m aware that I’m incredibly privileged and have lived a very comfortable, sheltered life, when compared to most Filipinos, especially amid this global pandemic when practically half the country is starving. I’m really nervous to share this with all of you, but please be easy on me as this was not easy for me to do.
Ref29 questions:
Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Yes, education is held in high regard here in the Philippines, to the point that landing a well-paying job without a bachelor’s is extremely hard, if not downright possible. Parents are also expected to pay for the entirety of college, although, of course, this isn’t true for all. Coming from an upper-middle-class family, I was even more pressured to land a spot in one of the Big 4 universities, which is sort of like the equivalent of the Ivy League here. In the Philippines, college admission involves taking an entrance exam at each college that you’re applying to, so my senior year of high school was spent in after-class prep centers to prepare for this. Fortunately, I was able to major in a pre-law course in a Big 4 university, which my parents fully paid for.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
My parents had the mindset of “work hard, play hard,” which meant that they worked seven days a week, but compensated for it with week-long family vacations abroad between twice to thrice a year. As I mentioned, this was a very privileged upbringing. They weren’t extremely thrifty, but they definitely instilled in us values like delayed gratification and spending money only if you worked hard for it. They also insisted that my brother and I save at least 20% of our allowances, so upon reaching first grade, we were taken to the bank to open a junior savings account.
Unfortunately, our business has taken a huge hit, due to policies that the current government has, so we’ve had to significantly tighten our belts. We don’t worry about putting food on the table or of being unable to afford basic necessities; however, we’ve had to do away with things like weekend shopping trips, impulse purchases, eating out every week, and international vacations for the past two or three years now.
Did you worry about money growing up?
It’s extremely privileged of me to say this, but no. I didn’t. I come from generational wealth on my mom’s side while my paternal grandfather owns several properties. I was always secure in the fact that if we were ever struggling financially, one of my grandparents would end up bailing us out.
Do you worry about money now?
Yes, I’m currently saving up to go to law school abroad. This will mean repeating my bachelor’s, but this program will open up so many opportunities for me. However, it also means having to save up at least $20,000 to make it work, and I’m still pretty far from my goal.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
I’m not yet financially responsible for myself. My 22-year-old brother, E, and I are still living with our parents, and they’ve refused our offer to pitch in with the bills. They both believe that as long as they’re still working, then it’s their duty to provide for their children. However, this also means that their kids are their retirement plans, which is a very common mentality in the Philippines.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain.
No, I haven’t.
SECTION ONE: ASSETS AND DEBT
Retirement Balance: All my money right now is being poured to fund my future studies, so I don’t have a retirement balance yet. I don’t know if this is wise or not, and this has been a great cause for my anxiety these past few months.
Savings Account Balance: I have approximately $16,000 spread out across three different bank accounts right now.
Miscellaneous Debt: I bought AirPods from my friend last year, and she asked me to pay her back in installments, so she wouldn’t be tempted to spend all the money in one go. I have approximately $56 left on this, which I’ll be paying next month.
SECTION TWO: INCOME
Income Progression:
This is my first job ever. As I previously mentioned, school is extremely important here in the Philippines. In my case, throughout my elementary and high school years, I was in school from 7 a.m. to 4 p.m., and this was supplemented by after-class tutoring sessions and weekend advanced classes. College was basically the same since I decided to take up two minor degrees, in addition to my major, which meant that I took 8-10 classes every semester. So, I didn’t have time at all for a part-time job, which was okay, given the fact that my parents funded my education 100%.
2019-2020: I graduated from university in June 2019 and my parents asked me to start working in the family business. This didn’t turn out so good, though, since they refused to pay me a salary and would guilt-trip me whenever I’d take money from the day’s sales to pay for my expenses. When talks of a lockdown began in February 2020, I began looking for a job that would allow me to work remote since I had an inkling that our business would be shut down. Fortunately, my friend recommended me for an open position in the company that she was working at, and that’s where I’ve been since then.
In addition to my full-time job as a Social Media Analyst, I also started doing freelance work early last year.
Main Job Monthly Take Home: This varies. I’m considered a freelancer in my job, despite the fact that I’ve been with them since early 2020. I think they mostly do this to avoid paying me benefits, which is morally questionable but sort-of legal in the Philippines. So, I get paid a daily rate and am on a no-work-no-pay basis. If I don’t take any leaves for the month, then my take-home pay will be $582.79.
Side Gig Monthly Take Home: Again, this varies. In 2020, I believe I averaged approximately $1,200 per month. I don’t know if I’ll be able to hit these same numbers this year, though.
SECTION THREE: EXPENSES
All expenses below are monthly unless otherwise specified.
Phone Bill: This varies, depending on my data usage. Our WiFi doesn’t reach the second floor, so I’m forced to use my data if I’m working or staying in my bedroom. Our phone bills during lockdown were also suspended and have been amortized over six months since then, so I’m still paying this off. Currently, my phone bill can be anywhere from $52 to $83.
Subscriptions: Spotify Premium ($3) – but this is added to my phone bill, thanks to my service provider. I also pay for Babbel ($13) because language learning is my hobby, and I’m currently learning Brazilian Portuguese.
Pet Expenses: I average about $10 for my dog’s food and treats. A trip to the vet for a regular check-up is $8. My local government unit provides certain pet vaccines for free, so we get our shots from them.
Other: My brother, E, and I have privately agreed to answer for the expenses that our 10-year-old brother, L, incurs. So, we pay for his food, school supplies, etc. I budget $15 for him, but I’m not upset if I have to go over this amount. Right now, though, I’m paying for most of L’s expenses since E’s business isn’t doing too hot, due to the post-holiday slump.
DISCLAIMER: Face masks are mandatory, if you’re outside. People also aren’t allowed to go into establishments if they don’t have a face mask + face shield on. Both of these were worn at all times outside my home.
DAY ONE - SUNDAY, JANUARY 10
10:00 a.m. – My cousin and her husband are heading to the shopping mall to run a few errands. I go with them to have my eyes checked as my last prescription was from 2019. The doctor tells me that astigmatism in my right eye has been corrected (thank god) but that my left eye has gotten worse (noooo). I buy contact lenses and have them put in new lenses in my specs. $93
1:30 p.m. – My cousin is a few weeks pregnant and is craving mushroom soup from a particular chain restaurant, so we head over there. I get a burger and offer to pay for my share, but she and her husband refuse.
5:00 p.m. – My parents are very religious and require us to attend Sunday Mass every week as a family. Our church has the recommended COVID-19 measures in place (2-3 people to a pew, contact tracing, etc.), but I’m still annoyed that the Catholic Church here is trying to claim that mass is an essential service that should be allowed to continue, even when it clearly isn’t.
6:00 p.m. – Before heading home, we drop off take-out dinner for my Grandma. She lives alone, so we try to visit her at least once a week. We talk through the gate, though, to keep her safe.
11:00 p.m. – As a social media analyst, my shift is from 12 a.m. to 9 a.m. because I have to take note of all the online traction from the day before. This has worked rather well for me, mainly because I have insomnia.
Daily Total: $93
DAY TWO - MONDAY, JANUARY 11
5:30 a.m. – On Mondays, I have to analyze all social media traction from the weekend, and this has definitely cemented my deep hatred for this day of the week. Fortunately, it wasn’t too terrible this time. I chill for a bit by catching an episode of Friend Zone, a TV series from Thailand that’s sort of like Gossip Girl, except they’re middle-class and have actual jobs.
7:00 a.m. – I wake up L for his classes and begin working on my freelance job. Breakfast is leftovers from Sunday night dinner, so I have Truffle Mac and Cheese, and Garlic Parmesan Chicken Wings. My parents and E usually leave very early in the morning for their respective businesses, so it’s usually just me and L.
10:00 a.m. – I send off my social media reports and watch an episode of Fairy Tail.
1:00 p.m. – My brain is out of creative juices, so I take a nap. Before doing so, I place an order to replenish my toner ($5) and AHA serum ($5). I’m also running low on my fish oil capsules, so I order that too ($6.87). My total comes out to $19.25, due to shipping. $19.25
3:00 p.m. – L wakes up from my nap and I work some more before heading out to walk my dog. It’s cold outside – 28ºC or 82.4ºF. This is how winters in Manila look like!
6:45 p.m. – Dinner is white rice, Steamed Tilapia, and Ginataang Sigarilyas. According to Google, this translates to “Winged Beans in Coconut Milk.” I don’t know if this translation is 100% legit but it’s probably one of my favorite vegetable dishes ever.
Daily Total: $19.25
DAY THREE - TUESDAY, JANUARY 12
2:30 a.m. – One of my accounts is in crisis mode, so their reports are much more finicky than usual. When I feel that my brain is about to explode from reading social media posts, I work on my freelance deliverables.
7:00 a.m. – Again, I wake up L. Tuesdays are hard for him because he has back-to-back classes, and it isn’t long before I notice that he seems a bit overwhelmed. This year has been tough for him because we moved him to a new school and this, plus online learning, meant that he’s had to adjust like crazy. It’s too much for a 10-year-old, I think. I buy him his favorite Iced Cacao milk tea (I think it’s called boba in the States) to cheer him up and order an Iced Matcha for myself ($7.89). We drink our milk teas while having a very healthy breakfast of hotdogs and rice. $7.89
11:00 a.m. – The rest of the morning goes by quickly. I send off my reports, work on my deliverables, pitch to new clients, answer e-mails, and so on. Unfortunately, two of my clients have declined to work with me again since I was a bit late with a few of my deliverables, due to the holiday season. I try to take it as a sign from the universe that I need to slow down, but I’m still pretty sad about it.
5:30 p.m. – I wake up from a nap and notice that my phone bill is due, so I pay ($53.49). I Dinner tonight is Fried Milkfish, Rice cooked with Crab Fat, and Sayote sa Sotanghon, which is basically chayote mixed with vermicelli. $53.49
Daily Total: $61.38
DAY FOUR - WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 13
2:00 a.m. – Thank God, my account has ended its crisis mode, so work is a bit more chill. Again, social media traction and freelance work. When I was 15, I thought I’d be spending my early twenties in a high-paying corporate job, wearing cute clothes and going to parties afterward. Instead, I’m spending it in teddy bear pajamas. I blame Gossip Girl and Korean dramas for my unrealistic expectations.
7:00 a.m. – After waking up L and sending off my reports, I spend the rest of the day working on my freelance jobs.
11:30 a.m. – Our live-in helper, J, prepares fried chicken for lunch and I eat it with L. He still has some time left before his next class, so I play a few rounds of Among Us with him. I honestly don’t enjoy the game as much as I make it seem I do, but it’s his absolute favorite and I like having these small bonding moments with my little brother.
1:45 p.m. – My brain can’t take it anymore, and I pass out from exhaustion.
3:30 p.m. – L wakes me up from my nap and I try my best to get a few more things done. Thankfully, my next deadline involves a podcast script on a certain historical event. These are pretty easy to write, although researching them can be a pain in the ass sometimes.
4:00 p.m. – I take a break from work by checking out apartment listings because it’s fun, even though I have no plans to move out. I honestly want to, mainly because my relationship with my parents isn’t that great, and living back home has highlighted that even more. E has it worse, though, and his relationship with our dad has deteriorated so much that they got into a few physical fights during lockdown. While I can afford to move out, E can’t and of course, L is underage, so I can’t take him with me. Right now, I’m bearing the brunt of my parents’ stress and frustration, and if I leave, then it’s likely that they’ll start taking it out on my brothers. So, I don’t because I’m their eldest sister and a huge part of me feels like it’s my duty to protect them. But if worse comes to worst, then I’m ready to shoulder E and his expenses. He only started his business last year, so it isn’t super profitable yet. The post-holiday slump hasn’t been kind to him either.
5:30 p.m. – Dinner is Tinolang Manok, which is a dish that consists of chicken and papaya slices cooked in ginger-flavored broth. For me, it’s a must-eat during “wintertime.” While eating, my parents ask me what my plans are for my upcoming birthday. They’re trying to pressure me to treat the entire family to dinner, but I decline because a) I’m trying to save money, and b) COVID-19.
8:45 p.m. – I take a shower and catch a few episodes of a Chinese drama called “A Love So Beautiful.” Then, it’s back to work.
Daily Total: $0
DAY FIVE – THURSDAY, JANUARY 14
3:45 a.m. – I finish my main job early, so I go and work on some deliverables, but I keep getting distracted by “A Love So Beautiful” that I barely get anything done. Before I know it, it’s nearly time to wake my brother up, and I haven’t accomplished anything at all.
5:00 a.m. – My mom brought home fried chicken from McDonalds last night for L’s breakfast, but I’m so hungry that I steal it. I order the same thing ($5.50) and schedule a 6:30 a.m. delivery to hide my crime. $5.50
7:00 a.m. – I wake up L, shower, and settle in to watch the final episode in the series. I’ve accepted the fact that I won’t get anything done until I find out what happens to Chen Xiaoxi and Jiang Chen.
12:00 p.m. – I must be more torn up about losing two clients than I initially thought I was because I end up crying while working on a deliverable. I lock myself in my room and plan to have a good 10-minute crying session, but this quickly into a full-on breakdown. I never really recognized the impact that my home situation and lack of proper sleep have left on me, but it looks like the emotional toll is too much. I’m also feeling really anxious about one of my long-time clients, who I feel is a bit disappointed with my work lately, and this sends me spiraling even more. I end up crying for a good hour or so. It would have gone on longer, had it not been for L, who knocks on my door and cuddles me for a bit. He can tell that I’m upset, thanks to my swollen eyes, so he offers to treat me to milk tea using his Christmas money. It’s sweet, but I decline.
4:00 p.m. – After working and a quick nap, I put on a Korean eye mask to hide how swollen they are. My dad gets annoyed whenever we cry since he perceives it to be a sign of weakness. I know that he’s completely wrong about this, but I’m too exhausted to argue with him tonight.
5:00 p.m. – Dinner is white rice and Pork Bistek. I don’t know if that has a proper English translation, but it’s basically pork chops and onions cooked in soy sauce and calamansi juice. I’m still feeling pretty lethargic from my breakdown earlier, so I take a cold shower to feel refreshed.
10:00 p.m. – I guess breaking down uses up a lot of energy because I’m starving, even though dinner was only a few hours ago. L is also hungry, so we ask J to buy us Puto Bumbong, which is a steamed purple rice cake topped with margarine, coconut flakes, and brown sugar. This particular stall also puts cheese and condensed milk on theirs. I personally find it too sweet, but L is in love, as only 10-year-old boys who can eat a whole jar of Nutella can be. J uses the leftover money from today’s dinner to pay.
11:30 p.m. – Work is pretty chill today, so I watch an anime called “The Promised Neverland” in-between monitoring social media traction.
Daily Total: $5.50
DAY SIX – FRIDAY, JANUARY 15
12:00 a.m. – Happy 23rd birthday to me! I initially wanted to go to treat myself to a spa to celebrate my birthday, but I canceled my booking because of COVID-19. Hopefully, the Philippine government will finally get its shit together by March, which is when I had my appointment rebooked. I’m doubtful, but hopeful.
7:00 a.m. – I log off for the week and settle in to finally enjoy some no-work bliss. Kidding! I wake up L, take a shower, and work on my freelancing deliverables. Since it’s my birthday, J allows me to decide what breakfast will be and I pick chicken nuggets because I know that it’s something that L will enjoy too.
11:00 a.m. – My lack of sleep this week has caught up to me, and I pass out from exhaustion. Thankfully, I don’t have any deadlines today.
4:30 p.m. – L wakes me up, and we dress for Mass. My parents require us to attend Mass together as a family whenever it’s someone’s birthday. L isn’t allowed inside the church because of my area’s COVID-19 restrictions, so he and E sit outside. I’m jealous because the air is so stuffy inside the church that breathing through a mask and a face shield is a struggle.
6:00 p.m. – We come home and a few of my other family members are there for a...surprise birthday dinner. I’m trying not to feel annoyed at the fact that my parents went against my wishes because I know they mean well, but still. I had planned a quiet night with anime and a face mask to celebrate my birthday, but of course, this won’t be feasible any longer. I’m trying not to let my irritation show because everyone made an effort to be here, but still. Oh well, at least they kept the number of guests below 10, in line with restrictions.
6:30 p.m. – My mom ordered food from a caterer, and we settle in for a dinner of Baked Salmon in Cheese with Green Beans, Braised Chicken with Rosemary and Potatoes, and Ox Tongue with Mushrooms. They’re all pretty good, but I can’t help but dream of the face mask that I had prepared in anticipation of tonight.
11:00 p.m. – I nurse a glass of white wine, and it isn’t long before my aunt and I have managed to polish off the entire bottle. I can’t help but feel a bit sad because only two of my friends greeted me today. I know that I shouldn’t put a lot of stock into birthday greetings because they’re just words, and I know that all my friends are busy with work, and I also know that they’re going through their own mental battles right now because of COVID-19, but still. It sucks.
11:30 p.m. – A friend from Germany asks me if he calculated the timezone correctly, and he wishes me a happy birthday. As a gift, he sends me a video of snow falling out his window. I don’t know if I’m crying because I’m wine-drunk, or if I’m crying out of envy because SNOW or because I’m a teeny bit sad. Maybe it’s all of the above, idk.
Daily Total: $0
DAY SEVEN - SATURDAY, JANUARY 16
2:00 a.m. – Party’s over and all my relatives have gone home. I set an alarm for 4 a.m. because I have an early-morning deadline to meet.
9:00 a.m. – I must be drunker and more tired than I thought because I completely slept through my alarm. I apologize to my client and ask for an extension. I’m hoping that he’s kind to me because it was my birthday the day before; fortunately, he grants the extension.
12:30 p.m. – E is craving Chinese food, so I hop onto Grab (Southeast Asian version of Uber) and place an order from Panda Express. They were only brought to the Philippines in 2019, and lines have been pretty long, so it was only this year that I was able to taste their non-Chinese Chinese food. I pay for our food as a late birthday treat for my brothers and also because I know that E has been denying himself a lot of things lately to have more cash to inject into his business. With delivery, the total comes out to $13. He offers to wash the dishes afterward, which I’m really thankful for. $13
3:00 p.m. – The rest of the day passes by quickly. It’s J’s day off today, so L and I do household chores. While doing them, I catch up with some of my favorite podcasts, including Military Murder and The Asian Madness Podcast. Highly recommend the two of them. And, let me know if you have any recommendations!
4:00 p.m. – I’m trying to work out whether I should buy the new Macbook Air M1 or not. I’ve been using my 2014 Macbook Air 11 since high school, but while this has been great for school, it’s a huge challenge now that I’m spending more than eight hours a day on it. The screen is too small, so my back and shoulders hurt the entire time I’m on it, and the resolution is also too low. A few people from this sub have recommended that I get an external monitor, but I don’t have a home office or a desk. I work on our dining room table because my vanity’s too small. Since we don’t have Apple Store here in the Philippines, I have to make do with a re-seller. Right now, the lowest that a Macbook Air M1 goes for is $1,102. This is something that I can definitely afford, especially since a junk shop has offered to give me $249 in exchange for my old one. But I’m having trouble being okay with buying a new laptop when my current one is working just fine. I know I deserve it after all my hard work and I know that it’ll make working much easier, but still.
6:00 p.m. – For dinner, my parents bring home take-out from a local restaurant. We eat Breaded Tofu, Butter Buffalo Chicken Wings, and Mixed Vegetables. I do the dishes afterward, which takes a long time, because dishwashers aren’t common in the Philippines, and it’s hard to manually scrub oily food.
8:00 p.m. – I work and watch anime in-between.
Daily Total: $13
WEEKLY TOTAL: $192.13
REFLECTION
This week’s spending was unusually high, mainly because of my phone bill and rare expenses, like eyeglasses and contact lenses. I also had way too much food delivered this week, but I felt like treating my brothers since it was my birthday, so I don’t mind that all. My usual weekly spending, however, is somewhere around $10.
But aside from spending, I think that writing this money diary really forced me to confront my privilege and mental health issues, as well as my workaholic tendencies. It’s tough to admit to yourself that you aren’t happy at all, but maybe it’s time to finally face it. I feel like I also have a problem with making big splurges that will ultimately benefit me, so moving forward, I’d like to remember that while treating my brothers is totally okay, I should be kinder to myself too. There’s still a lot of issues that I need to unpack and work through, but hopefully, being 23 will give me the strength to do so.
I hope you enjoyed this money diary from the other side of the world :-) And sorry for any typos. I’d edit, but it’s 2 a.m. right now, and I’m exhausted.

Hello,
My laptop really wants to die and so I finally have given up on waiting until the components get cheaper.
I found a well reviewed German PC builder that let's you customise almost everything and even has graphics cards available.
The components that will be in it are:
AMD Ryzen 5 3600, 6x 3600 MHz Gainward Ghost GeForce GTX 1660 SUPER, 6 GB GDDR6 16 GB DDR4-RAM, Dual Channel (2x 8 GB), 3000 MHz, Kingston HyperX FURY 240 GB M.2 SATA SSD Kingston A400 (I have two brandnew 2TB SSDs, so no more internal storage required) 600 Watt be quiet! System Power B9, 87 % Effizienz, 80 Plus Bronze zertifiziert WiFi PCIe Card2400 MBit/s (600 MBit/s @ 2,4 GHz) - CSL PAX-2400 (here is the link to the configuration: https://www.csl-computer.com/k/FT9L8IOm)
The total package is about 833 Euros (got a 15 Euro Voucher) incl. Tax (about 1010 USD)
There is an option to chose a RX 580 GTS XXX instead for 90 Euro (110 USD) less, which I am considering.
Is that acceptable or too expensive? (no hardcore gamer, I use my PC 90% to work but I want to play games in 1080p for the next few years without having to make too many amends in settings)
Thanks!

Title: I am 35 years old, I made $67,665 gross last year (between multiple jobs) and live in Buffalo and work in higher education and retail.
This is my 5th MD update. Previous MDs in June 2019, October 2019, February 2020, and July 2020.
Ref29 questions:
Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Absolutely. Both of my parents have bachelors degrees, and it wasn’t even a conversation of “if” I was going to college, but “where”. I ended up going to a private 4-year college, with a 75% merit scholarship. I was able to pay for the first semester with savings bonds/general savings, but took out loans for the remaining semesters. I worked 2 on campus jobs (tour guide and TA), plus at a coffee shop - this was more for spending money/gas etc. Looking back, I wish that I had put more of that income aside for paying for school, but I was definitely headlong into the student loan trap of “it’s ok, this is good debt….blah blah.”
I thought that i had the exact idea of what I wanted to do for a career - and that basically required a masters degree - so I went straight to grad school after undergrad. Private - and took out the maximum student loans for both years. I cannot stress what a terrible financial idea this was. The last half of my MA was in DC, so I used the loans for rent/food, as I had a full time unpaid internship. Long story short, what I thought was my career goal wasn’t.
I am FINALLY nearly done paying off my loans. If I had to go back and give my past self advice, it would have been to not go to grad school directly after undergrad. I still might have gotten my masters, but I would have done it in a much more financially responsible way.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
We had conversations growing up - but it was much more of a conversation now that I’m an adult. I’ve noted in past MDs, but my parents have told us that they regret not being able to help us all more as teenagers/college/young adults, so they’ve been extremely supportive of my focus on debt repayment.
Did you worry about money growing up?
Not really. I remember being conscious about it - we didn’t have new cars (EVER - like it’s still a thing), and we used coupons/budgets/bulk freezer meals for shopping, but I think a portion of that was that there were 4 of us kids. We were all involved in a variety of extracurricular activities as well, but I don’t remember even being like, limited or restricted from doing anything.
Do you worry about money now?
Absolutely.
While I am noting that I’m making progress, it is still very overwhelming. It’s really hard for me not to beat myself up when I either buy “treats” or things that aren’t really treats, but are just home comforts. I finally bought myself 2 sets (!) of decent sheets this past month after having 1 set of crappy sheets for the last 2 years lol. I still have so much work to do, on debt repayment, fully funding my emergency fund, and (massive goal here) saving for a down payment on a house.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
I would say I was financially responsible for myself when I moved for grad school in the fall of 2008 (so when I was 22/23).
That being said, I definitely have had a financial safety net - my parents always assisted with grocery money if I needed it - when I was married, that definitely was not only a safety net, but also got me in a lot of bad habits.
Since my divorce, my parents have assisted with cell phone, car insurance, and letting me live with them for a few months when I moved back to the US. I know that if something happened, they would absolutely assist with a place to live if I needed it.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain.
As previous MDs have noted, my parents have assisted with assorted checks when my dad got a bonus, and they have always been extremely generous with holiday $.
Section One: Assets and Debt
Retirement Balance (and how you got there): $33,194.67 (up from $23,800 in February 2020)
This is a combo of Stash Retire ($1721.52), 401K from a previous job ($17,330.01), retirement accounts from my current job ($2807.58 in my optional IRA to which I contribute extra; $2947.46 in the basic retirement plan, to which my employer contributes 7%), and TSP from a previous job ($8,388.10).
Savings account balance: $1000
Checking account balance: $1381.07 (at the start of the money diary)
Credit card debt (and how you accumulated it): $7,558.08 (focus has been more on student loans, plus I am a bit guilty of using it at random points) (down from $19,556 in June 2019).
Student loan debt (for what degree): Current remaining balance is $972.57!!!!! This is down from $23,645.37 in June 2019) (combined loans for undergraduate and graduate degrees in International Relations. To give you an idea of how much I’ve paid off - I’ve paid $118,297.81 off up to this point).
*note: December was a PHENOMENAL debt payment month for me (just over $4k).
Section Two: Income
Main Job Monthly Take Home: $2847.53
*after using the IRS refund calculator, it became clear that I was expecting a much higher refund, so I stopped having extra withheld. Eventually I’ll get the hang of it.
Side Gig Monthly Take Home: $1442.72 (average monthly take home August-December 2020)
My retail job fully reopened, and I also applied for, and got a promotion, which meant both an hourly raise and more hours)
Any Other Monthly Income Here:

• Christmas $ from Mom & Dad - $1000
• Stimulus Checks - $1200 + $600 (Both of these went mainly to debt repayment)

Section Three: Expenses
Rent / Mortgage $980.00/month (+ $3.95 service charge when I pay online) (no change)
Retirement contribution: $115.58/month Roth IRA from work + $80.00/month into Stash Retire (no change)
Savings contribution: $0/month (Debt payments are the priority)
Investment contribution: None
Health/Dental/Vision Insurance: $76.38/month (Through work, it gets taken out biweekly)
FSA contribution: $27.78 biweekly (I set my annual contribution at $750 this year, up from $600)
Debt payments
Student Loan minimums: $55.54 is strictly the minimum for my FINAL (!!!) student loan, but as you all know by now, I have been attacking these with a vengeance and plan on this being gone no later than March.
Credit Card minimums: Avg. Monthly Payment $300. (as mentioned in the debt section, I have slipped slightly on allowing myself to use the credit card, but still have been able to lower my overall amount)
Wifi/Cable/Landline: $64.99/month
Cellphone: Still on the parental plan, but will be transitioning off. I’m shopping around and have started to budget.
Subscriptions: Apple storage - $2.99/month; Netflix- $8.99; (even though I’ve been able to be at home much much more, we still get a monthly barkbox for the toys; Spotify Premium - $9.99/month. Headspace - $14.99/month. Renaissance Periodization - $16.19/month
Laundry (if you pay per load): $40/month. I put aside $10 per paycheck.
Gym membership $75/month - I budget this much for my ROMWOD and Movement Vault monthly subscriptions. This also covers my monthly subscription for my WHOOP band. My retail side gig also provides $225/month to work out. This covers my monthly membership to my crossfit gym, as well as extra megaformer classes. $32.63/month for WHOOP; $13.95/month for ROMWOD; $9.99/month for Movement vault
Pet expenses: $150/month - includes pet insurance. This is what I put into my budget for insurance, food, grooming etc.) Barkbox 31.54/month; Pet insurance $79.24
Car payment / insurance / average gas:$100/month (as my dad plans on retiring within the next year, he will be signing over my car to me, meaning that I will be taking on my insurance. I fully acknowledge that this has been nice to not have to worry about, and that my parents have been absolutely amazing. The current annual insurance for my car looks like it will be around $450. Future money diaries will take this into account.
Renter insurance: $12.50/month
Average groceries / household supply spend; Looking at YNAB, my average spend has been just over $700/month. This seems insanely high for one person, but I do also follow a RP meal plan, meaning that I tend to eat A LOT to fuel my workouts. I also haven’t gone out basically at all ….
Regular therapy: N/A
Charitable Giving: $75/avg. August-Dec 2020 (Much of this was “rage” donating in the run up to the election)
Annual Expenses:
YNAB (You Need A Budget): $83.99/year
NB: Anytime I leave my house, I am masked, including gym visits. It’s honestly not terrible once you find a mask that works for you!
Day 1: Friday
5:45am: Alarm goes off and I get up to put the kettle on to start coffee. Today is a weigh in and weekly review for my meal/training plan, so I enter my numbers and see what my upcoming week will look like as far as my macros. I notice that my chest/shoulder are sore, and hurt when I take a deep breath, but assume that I just slept on my arm wrong. I take out the dog, feed him, and head out to my weightlifting class.
7:30am: Nope, not just sleeping on it wrong. I make it through the lifting portion, but when we start the metcon, I have to stop because it hurts too much to take a really deep breath, instead stretching and cheering everyone else on. Annoyed, but hopefully it’s nothing too crazy. I think it’s just a strain from my muscle up drills the day before. Once I get home, I make breakfast - a savory oatmeal with oats, cheese, chicken sausage, egg whites, and mushrooms, topped with a fried egg and za’atar seasoning from Trader Joe’s. YUM. I log into work and get settled in for a 2 hour (ugh) staff meeting.
11:00am: Finally done with that. Thank goodness for my camera getting to be off. I take a shower and get into “work” clothes - aka lululemon from top to bottom (align leggings, ebb to street crop tank, and a sit in lotus wrap). Back to work until it’s time for lunch, which I have just after noon (rice, sweet potatoes, bell peppers, and ground beef, topped with avocado). Work continues afterwards.
2:00pm: Time for work #2! It’s a fairly uneventful (and slow) afternoon/evening, which is ok after the craziness of the holiday season. And I only have to tell 2 people to put their masks on over their nose and they don’t give me an attitude - woohoo! Around 5 I eat my food on my 10 minute break - another taco-ish bowl, just without the avocado from earlier. I get out from work at 7:30pm.
8:00pm: Home, take the pooch out and feed him and make my casein hot chocolate (casein protein is a slower digesting type vs. whey and it’s my evening “meal” most of the time) plus a couple dark chocolate peanut butter cups. I facetime my Mom briefly and then we each put on our respective Star Wars shows - she and my Dad are watching the Mandolorian (they just got Disney+), and I’m deep into season 4 of the Clone Wars. Bedtime routine starts at 9:30 with a couple of melatonin gummies and I brush my teeth and wash my face (eye makeup remover, then Neutrogena foaming cleanser, and a nighttime moisturizer from Aldi). Snuggle up with the dog and a heating pad with a Headspace night sounds playing.
Daily Total: $0
Day 2: Saturday
5:50am: NO. It’s like 30 minutes before I want to wake up...NO.
6:10am: Uggggggh
6:20am: FINE. Dog outside, then fed. I make coffee and another savory oatmeal (AMAZING - same as yesterday, just no bell peppers). Catch up on podcasts and my YNAB budget. In happiest news, I can take a full big breath without that weird pain from yesterday! Yay!
10:00am: Home from my workout, which went amazingly - I love a good long chipper of a workout! I take the dog out for a little cold weather walk and then make my post-workout meal - Kodiak chocolate chip pancakes with blueberries! (use 1 egg and almond milk to make the pancakes and it fits my post-workout macros: 35P, 10F, 65C). I follow this with a cuddle session with the dog while watching Marple episodes and drinking coffee. I also add items to my lululemon shopping cart and exit out of it before I can spend money. While I get a great discount (especially on markdowns), I know I don’t really NEED anything, so I don’t get anything.
1:00pm: Off to the mall for work. I stop on the way to fill the gas tank ($25). It’s a busy day, but a good one - during my break I eat my taco bowl (rice, sweet potatoes, ground beef, peppers and avocado). I work until 7:30pm.
8:00pm: Home, dog out, casein hot chocolate - the usual. I’m nothing if not a creature of habit. I pull out a Trader Joe’s chocolate croissant to prove overnight in the oven. Bedtime is around 10pm.
Daily Total: $25
Day 3: Sunday
7:50am: Whoooops, I intended to wake up around 7:15, but I didn’t actually set the alarm. Luckily the dog wakes me up with a polite whine - I take him out, make coffee and a bowl of oatmeal (oats, almond milk, egg whites, topped with blueberries), and head to my workout around 9.
11:00am: 2 workout classes later, I’m home - post workout meal is the aforementioned chocolate croissant, and a little egg scramble of egg whites, mushrooms, chicken sausage and broccoli. The afternoon is spent with old Miss Marple episodes on Amazon Prime, combined with laundry and apartment cleaning.
3:00pm: I made a quick loaf of bread (2 hrs of rising, then shaping) and put it in the oven. Happily it turns out pretty damn tasty - I make Trader Joe’s Cippino (seafood soup) and have that with toasted fresh bread around 4/4:30pm. A Clone Wars marathon ensues - the Bills are playing in the AFC championship tonight, so the city is basically a giant ball of nerves. I don’t watch the games (and haven’t all season - mostly because I don’t have all the apps/cable), but I follow the score on my phone while watching many (MANY) episodes of Clone Wars. I facetime my mom and dad around 7 after they finish the Mandolorian and we can all squeal with excitement.
9:00pm: Melatonin gummies, contacts out, teeth brushed, face washed, bedtime.
Daily Total: $0
Day 4: Monday
5:45am: Awake, coffee, take the dog out, head to crossfit.
7:30am: Home, dog out again, then breakfast (homemade toast, everything but the bagel smoked salmon, scrambled egg+egg whites) and more coffee. I login to work at 8am, and get the morning podcasts going (Up First, the Daily, Post Reports, the Intelligence).
10:00am: I place a Target pickup order for the snacks for our break area at the mall (seltzer, peanut butter crackers, cookies, granola bars - all single serving packs). I will be reimbursed for this by the store. ($39.57 - I get a notice that an item isn’t available after I place the order...oh well)
11:00am: I’m traveling out of state for a couple of days - it’s a long awaited tattoo coverup (don’t get a tattoo for a significant other….I knew not to do this...and yet I still did), so I make my list of items to pack and things to remember to do (take out trash, do all my dishes, etc). I will be driving to my destination (Indiana), staying at a hotel by myself, going to the tattoo shop (masked), and back to the hotel. Not telling friends I’m there, not going out anywhere. And I’ve scheduled a test for 4 days after my return, per NYS rules. If I could make the drive nonstop, I would, but your girl isn’t giving herself a UTI lol. I’ll be masked and sanitized anytime I step out of my vehicle. Still super nervous, but getting this tattoo covered up is like….the final FINAL step. I also take a shower (finally, yes I’m gross and have been sitting in my workout clothes since I got home - god help me if I ever live with a human again lol).
2:00pm: Time for head out for work! On the way, I pick up my previously mentioned Target order, and also pick up meals for my trip from a local meal prep place - I get a bunch of great stuff (2 breakfasts, 2 dinners, 1 lunch plus energy bites for the car), plus it means that I can just hermit it up in the hotel room apart from the actual tattoo appointment. ($62.68). I get to the mall early before my shift starts - since I know I’ll have a tub in the hotel room, and I don’t have one in my apartment, I get a couple of bath bombs and lotion from Lush ($25.93) and a whole bunch of sheet masks from Sephora ($25.01). Then time for work - It’s a fairly quick shift, which is nice, not too terribly busy and we get a lot done. And people at the mall are generally not pills today - epic win!
8:15pm: Home from work - take the dog out and have a little evening meal of homemade soup from my co-worker (it’s a kale sausage soup her husband makes and it is AMAZING) and the rest of my homemade bread. I finish packing up and the poor pup definitely knows something is up. Bedtime around 10pm.
Daily Total: $153.19
Day 5: Tuesday
5:45am: Alarm, dog, coffee. Rather than dirtying dishes, I heat up one of the prepped breakfasts I brought (a breakfast sandwich with chicken, which is actually quite tasty - plus some blueberries). I get the car loaded up with my stuff and the dog - he’s staying with my parents while I’m gone - and head out by 7:15am. After I drop him off I top off my gas tank ($14.10), and also get a couple of bubly waters and a can of death wish coffee for the road ($6.25).
12:00pm: Lunch stop at panera - fuji apple chicken salad and a cup of chicken noodle soup - drive thru and eaten in the car ($10.94, but I have a gift card). Road Trip Podcasts: You’re Wrong About and Noble Blood.
3:00pm: Gas stop (there’s also a few bathroom stops, but since I didn’t spend anything, it’s not terribly relevant, right? :) ) ($27.01).
5:30pm: Arrival! Check in to the hotel - masked front desk employee, check. Bring my stuff up to my room, and jackpot - biiiiiiiiig tub. Looks like those bath bombs were a solid choice! Open up the work laptop to see if there is anything urgent - nothing crazy - and decide which meal I want for dinner. Bourbon Chicken with Broccoli and Sweet Potatoes it is. Plus a Sparkling Apple Cider vinegar beverage (ginger and lemon) from Trader Joes. Before I eat, I do a lower body focused stretching routine from ROMWOD since I spent so long in the car.
7:30pm: Bath Bomb, Face Mask, Feet Mask, and finished Night Stalker on Netflix. Since I’ll be quarantining until I get a negative COVID test after my trip, I order 10 meals through the same meal prep company that I got my travel meals from ($88.43 - includes both delivery fee and tip). They will be delivered on Sunday.
Daily Total: $146.73
Day 6: Wednesday
6:00am - I had intended to sleep longer, but my body is like - nope, you’re waking up at the same time no matter what. Coffee (keurig in the hotel room - ick) plus a prepped breakfast (a goat cheese egg white scramble with sweet potatoes - which is delicious). Morning podcasts and I open up the work laptop. Since I’m awake I guess.
7:30am: Hotel room workout - I do yesterday’s workout from my gym, with a few modifications, but it still feels great to move after sitting in the car for so long! Shower afterwards, then food (Mexican Taco Bowl!) and work.
10:30am: Squuuuueeee it’s time for my tattoo. I double mask up, drive through for a Starbucks order ($4.74 - paid for on my Starbucks app with previously loaded funds) and head to the shop! I already paid my deposit and took advantage of a gift card sale before Christmas so I don’t owe anything additional today. We do linework, shading, and partial color. It’s going to take 2 appointments to do the full thing, so we make my next appointment for May (augh, I cannot wait!). My coverup is over black text, so a cover up involves a LOT of layering of color. I’m impressed that I still have stamina after not getting a tattoo for nearly 3 years.This is going to be BEAUTIFUL.
2:30pm: After my tattoo appointment, I make a quick stop at CVS (still double masked!) to pick up aquaphor, orange dial soap, ibuprofen, and toothpaste (cause naturally that’s the one thing I forgot to pack - d’oh) ($22.00). I make a curbside pickup order for Panera - another soup and salad combo ($10.55 - again paid for with gift cards!). I head back to my hotel room, eat, put on more podcasts (Planet Money, Can He Do That, Code Switch) and log onto work. An uneventful afternoon follows.
6:00pm: Facetime call with my mom, then dinner and various true crime documentaries on Netflix and Pinterest browsing because as per usual, now I want allll the tattoos. I also put in an order for a grocery pickup on my way home (coffee, coffee creamer, fruit, etc) ($66.82). I try to make a testing appointment through NYS for my return COVID test on Monday, but the automated system keeps putting me in the first available, which is Friday….I’ll try to schedule again on Friday so that the timing works. Bedtime tattoo routine of wash, aquaphor and ibuprofen, as well as a sheet face mask. Sleep around 10:00pm.
Daily Total: $104.11
Day 7: Thursday
6:00am: Welp, up and at em! I finish packing all my stuff, check out of the hotel and warm up the car. I head out around 7:00am. Top off the gas tank ($12.80) and I also add $15 to my Starbucks card and drive thru a Starbucks (Spinach Feta Wrap + Cafe Misto with almond milk). Then it’s time for podcasts and lots of driving. My mom had suggested a podcast from Serial - S*%*Town. IT’S AMAZING and this drive has never gone so fast!
11:00am: (or sometime around this time) Stop for gas ($27.01) and another Starbucks stop ($15 reload) to get another misto, a bottle of water, and a fruit/cheese/hard boiled egg box.
3:00pm: I was going to try to make it all the way without stopping for anything else, but my stomach is about to eat itself. I stop at a Tim Hortons about 45 minutes away from my parents’ house and get timbits and a hot chocolate (which is gross) ($6.66 - eeep). I get to my parents’ house - my mom and dad stay upstairs and in the basement respectively while I use the bathroom and retrieve a very happy pup. Once I get everything out to the car, my mom and dad come outside (double masked, as am I) and we quickly wave and air hug from a distance. On the way home, I drive through the grocery pickup and get my groceries.
5:30pm: Finally home. The dog is very happy to be home too - my mom said when she would come into the bedroom where he was, he would look at her and be - “oh…..just you…”. Such a momma’s boy :) Dinner is actual food (the rest of the kale sausage soup). I also put together a batch of cranberry almond biscotti (based off the Ina Garten cherry pistachio biscotti) - the apartment smells delicious. Settling in for post-travel isolation lol.
9:30pm: Melatonin gummies, tattoo upkeep, and then bedtime with the dog!
Daily Total: $76.47
Weekly Total: $505.50
Food & Drink: $326.64
Fun & Entertainment: $0
Home & Health: $22.00
Clothes & Beauty: $50.94
Transport: $105.92
Reflections:
First, GODDAMN I AM SO EXCITED TO PAY OFF THIS STUDENT LOAN. Just paid another $200 on it this morning, so we’re under $800!! If you hear an excited scream from the Western New York area next month, don’t worry, it’s just me.
Second, this was a higher spend week than usual, but I’m really proud to have budgeted for all of it. I had basically prepaid for the tattoo (on the gift card) and there’s still leftover for my next appointment. I had also budgeted and saved for the increased amount of gas and food.
Third, hopefully this isn’t too boring. My life pre-pandemic wasn’t terribly interesting, and it certainly isn’t now lol. I’m hoping to continue my debt payoff progress by finishing paying off my credit card debt in 2021, and start saving my 3-6 month emergency fund before starting that house down payment savings! I’m even starting to allow myself to start actually looking at Zillow.
I have been isolating since I got back - just drove through and got my COVID test, so fingers crossed for a quick reply!
Lastly, the coverup tattoo is going to be beautiful. I can’t wait for it to be finished!
Thanks for reading this whole thing!

One day early. Buckle up, it's a long one!
Trigger warning: digestive & anxiety issues, medical procedures
Section One: Assets and Debt
Retirement Balance: PERA account $7,389.65
Equity: roughly $45,000 (house and vehicles)
Savings account balance: $523
'Secret' cash stash: about $800 between us which we pretend doesn't exist.
Checking account balance: $2,318
Credit card debt: $6404.47 🤯
Student loan debt: $30,593.72 for my associate's in nursing and one semester of my BSN which I have no plans to finish.
Current clinic bill: $814. I have about $620 left in my flex account from last year that I need to use so I'll probably pay this off this month.
Section Two: Income
Income progression: It's been pretty straightforward for me. I worked at McDonald's in high school (minimum wage) and came back after one semester of college. I was eventually promoted to shift manager in 2007 (I think $9.50/hr). I got my CNA license in 2008 and started working at a nursing home ($10.65/hr). Gradually increased over the years. When I got my LPN license in 2016, I bumped up to around $16.50/hr. Another bump for my RN license at the end of 2017. I started at $26.50 and now make $28.75 base. I work 12 hour nights so I get $.50 differential from 6p-10p and $1 for 10p-6a. This is considered a joke of a differential btw. We get time and a half on holidays. I do truly love my work but I'm so burnt out. I've been in long term care for so long that I'm not sure how to even do anything else at this point.
Main Job Monthly Take Home: ~$2700, more if I work a holiday or pick up a shift
Taxes: ~$700 Health insurance: $303 (family plan with high deductible) Retirement contributions: 6.5% of my pay HSA: $192.30 Flex: $46.16 Clinic bill payment: $100 Life/STD insurance: $54.42 Christmas account: $50
Side Gig Monthly Take Home: generally $0. I do sell some craft items on the side but I don't hustle.
Child support: supposed to be $531 but I get what I get most of the time.
I am married but we do not have a joint account. B's gross is $41,600/year. He recently started a new job and got a $4.50/hr pay increase. He's also a volunteer firefighter and gets paid once a year from that, although last year's check was only $750. He carries dental and vision insurance for us and has a flex set up, about $170/month.
Section Three: Expenses
Rent / Mortgage / HOA fees: $0. 2 bed 1 bath home we share with my daughter (Z, she's 8) full time and B's stepson (E, he's 14) part time. We own outright.
Property tax: $497 this year, B pays.
Car registration: $206 this year for my car, goes down a bit every year.
Home & car (3) insurance: $237, B pays. We just combined everything a few days ago so we might split this. ETA after getting the first bill, I will pay *$265/6 months* for my car and half of the SUV, about $175/6 months.*
Savings contribution: lol, whatever comes from my round up rule
Debt payments: CC bills $400, B's pellet grill $35 (was a Christmas present). B has no debt.
Electric: fluctuates with the climate, last month was $245!!! We are trying to figure out ways to reduce this. B pays.
Gas: $50 now on the yearly plan, B pays.
Watesewegarbage: ~$60, B pays.
Wifi: $59, I pay.
Cellphone: $290, I pay for 5 lines.
Babysitter: $180
Student loans: in deferment, not making payments
Meds: around $50, paid with flex money.
Monthly subscriptions: Hulu, HBO, Pandora, Design Bundles, razors, Netflix, Apple storage, NYT, Cricut Access, Disney+, Amazon subscribe and save items, my entire life, $250. I pay.
Amazon Prime: $124/year, I pay.
Pet expenses: averages around $100 between food, haircuts, shots and insurance for my youngest pup, I pay.
Car payment: $405.27 for my car. We paid cash for our used SUV in December, and B's truck is old and has been paid off for years.
Groceries: around $400, B tends to grab things here and there and I get the big hauls.
School lunch: free this year! Thanks USDA!
Extracurriculars: Z opted out of any extracurriculars this year due to COVID.
Regular therapy: nope
1/16 Saturday
3:30 AM: I'm awake but I refuse to get out of bed. Cruise Indeed and Facebook for jobs. I recently put in my 30 day notice so I need to find something ASAP. I've put in probably 6 online applications already. Print out two applications, three copies of my resume, and create two cover letters. Why do I have to fill out all my info on an application when they can find it on a resume? Get a year of a resume and cover letter making site for $24.99 because I'm terrible at both. Buy some new Brumates that I don't need $67.93 and see that my yearly Prime payment has been pulled. Watch YouTube and fall back to sleep around 5.
8:20 AM: B crawls into bed after work and snowblowing basically the entire yard. Cuddle for a while so he can leech my body heat before I go upstairs. I need to wash my hair. Fall into an internet hole of Facebook and NYT while lounging with the dogs.
Noon: B comes upstairs. I didn't wash my hair. We need some groceries so decide to drive the hour to the nearest town with a Walmart AND a Menards - it's the 15% off bag sale right now. Throw in some dry shampoo, brush my teeth and get dressed. Change the water jug in our machine (our tap water is sketch), let the dogs out and head out.
1:18 PM: Gas is up to $2.34/gallon. Cringe thinking about filling up the SUV. My car is a hybrid but doesn't like Minnesota winters. B and I debate bringing our cat to the vet during the drive. She has FIV and has been losing weight, but we decide against it as there's not much we can do at this point anyways. She's still happy so 🤷‍♀️
2:34: Check out of Menards. $99.15 on a new door lock with keypad, sanding blocks and paper, disposable condiment cups, and Armor All wipes after 15% off and B's $15 return credit that he forgot to use. B gets LED bulbs, grill brushes, motor oil, a door latch for our porch, something for his brother's toilet and a propane tank exchange. Only saw one guy without a mask, so I'd call that a win.
3:05: $15.98 after coupons at Joann's on more tumbler supplies (e-6000 spray, 5 taklon brushes) and one roll of clearance ribbon. Realize I have my Christmas money in my purse and forgot to use it. B goes to Harbor Freight for more tools he doesn't need and a sporting goods store for a gift card for his best friend's birthday.
3:32: We decide to go to Perkin's, hoping they won't be too busy in the off hour. The hostess is wearing her mask under her nose and I'm so annoyed. I have some weird stomach issue going on, so I just get two eggs and toast. B tells me he should be able to get the first COVID shot this week, and I tell him I still haven't changed my mind (we both already had COVID during an outbreak at our workplace). I've been 'not preventing' pregnancy for almost two years. At this point, I'm too anxious to get the vaccine, and there is just not enough data available on pregnant/TTC women to change my mind. My time limit is my birthday, so if I'm not pregnant by then I'll be getting the vaccine in August. $28.87 +$5 tip.
4:47: Check out of Walmart with wet cat food, pop, milk, butter, Mac and cheese, cereal, snacks for the kiddo, chips, ketchup, tator tots, Gatorade, Hawaiian Punch and deli meat. $88.65. Every time I ask B if we need something, he says we have it at home. Also, no grapes? Usually a Walmart trip sends me into an anxiety attack but the store is pretty empty today.
5:09: My favorite stop of the day: the liquor store. The store at home is so crazy expensive so this is a treat. I get Truly Iced Tea and two different kinds of hard coffee to try for $41.91. B picks up three cases of beer.
5:18: B stops for gas ($37 🥴) and we head for home. Buy some vape juice online, $86.59. Yeah yeah, I know. My gut hurts, I'm super bloated and I just want to nap. We talk about our options regarding my medical procedure that is coming up and decide to try and get it done while we're still on my work insurance. I had a positive FIT test so now I have to have a colonoscopy. I'll end up maxing out the deductible but I'll get it half off if we can pay the bill within 30 days. I'll get my PTO paid out at the end of my 30 day notice, so we should be able to swing it. Not really sure we have a great option at this point as B doesn't want me to take on another payment. He is so anti debt, and I have $6500 in CC debt. We are opposites in so many ways.
6:20: Get home and unload the SUV. The dogs are going WILD. I feel like garbage and immediately get into pajamas. Give the cat a can of wet food and she eats a few bites. I still can't find a type she really enjoys. I also hook up the drinking water fountain I bought for her a few days ago. B installs the new door lock and I'm thrilled to have a keypad again. The old one stopped working a few months ago. Pay an invoice for a bulk order of keychain tassels from a wholesale group, $19. Basically do nothing for the rest of the night.
9:45: I'm falling asleep in my recliner. I decide to do my nighttime routine (rinse face, No7 HydraLuminous Gel Cream, Algenist Complete Renewal Eye Balm) and go to bed in hopes of feeling better tomorrow. I skip brushing my teeth because I'm nursing a ginger ale. Watch some YouTube and fall asleep around 10:30.
Daily total: $478.07
1/17 Sunday
2:09 AM: I wake up for the second time tonight with nightmares. I rarely have them so I'm annoyed. B isn't in bed to cuddle with either. I go upstairs to use the bathroom and find him in his recliner. Realize I forgot to take my meds last night (antidepressant, probiotic, omeprazole, hair skin & nail vitamin, Lysine supplements, allergy pill) so grab those along with two Goli gummies and a lorazepam to help me calm down. My gut still hurts, and I'm so over this. Browse the internet and watch YouTube again to fall asleep.
3:55: Wake up to stomach cramps and know my colon is going to empty itself out. Park myself in the bathroom for half an hour and try not to pass out. I'm not sure if it's just IBS or something worse going on, but I'm glad I'm getting it checked out.
7:17: Still awake. I am stressed by the potential of not having a job for a few weeks, my health, and the current state of everything else in the world. Decide to compound this by opening my NYT app. I am so hopeful Joe can start turning things around.
12:17 PM: I must have finally fallen asleep because B comes down to ask if I want to go to South Dakota today. We check out local case rates by county and decide we are probably safe. We are about the only ones who wear our masks in public over there. I must admit that going through this pandemic feels much different out here in the boonies than it does in the city. We had a large surge in cases for about 4 weeks in November-December, and now we are back down to about 2-3 new cases a day. Our local businesses work hard to keep us safe, in part because they don't want to be known as the place so-and-so got COVID. Ah, small town gossip. We do our part try to support them as we really can't afford to lose any businesses in our area. I shoot a text to Z's dad to confirm I'm picking her up in the morning.
1:28: I finally get out of bed and wash my hair, which is my least favorite chore. I brush it out before my shower, use some Head and Shoulders 2 in 1 to combat my winter dry scalp, finish it off with SheaMoisture Purple Rice Water conditioner. I decide to heat style it today, so I use two heat protection sprays. To brush, wash, condition, brush again, dry and curl my hair takes 1.5 hours. Now I remember why I never do this.
3:30: We hide in the corner of the bar for the meat raffle. I really love coming here because the money they raise goes to local charities. We also have drinks and supper. I get a BLT chicken wrap, and we win 3 free drink tickets. We head out around 6. $50 + $10 tip, this comes out of my Christmas money. B goes to the drivethru on our way home and gets me a frozen hot chocolate. Yuuuum.
8:45: For some reason I can't keep all the school calendar changes straight. Z was supposed to be off tomorrow, but I just realized she does have school. I message Z's teacher to let her know Z won't be there, since she has her yearly physical tomorrow after being rescheduled 3 times. Do a quick nighttime routine, take my meds and head downstairs for YouTube and sleep. Hoping for a decent night of it!
Daily total: $60
1/18 Monday
3:05 AM: I'm awake, but for no particular reason this time. Working the night shift really messes with your sleeping schedule. I must have been snoring because B has gone upstairs to sleep in E's room. I clean the litter box and decide to fire up my laptop and Cricut machine to get some projects done I've been procrastinating. I finish a water bottle for B, a stash jar for a friend, create a couple Valentine's mock ups for my business page and seal some glitter signs. I grab a couple SVGs on Etsy $1.38. My mom sees my Snapchat and we message over the woes of insomnia.
6:20: I have come to the realization that buying craft items and actually using them are two separate hobbies. I lay in bed with the cat and doze.
8:40: Leave the house to go pick up Z. Her dad lives about 25 minutes away. On the way home we stop at Casey's for random snacks, $7.64. The clinic calls and we schedule my colonoscopy for Thursday. I have to get some blood drawn later this morning when I bring Z to her appointment. I also have to have a CT with contrast so I'll figure out when I can get that done as well. I take a quick body shower when we get home.
10:55: Bring Z to her well child check-up. I think they asked us about 100 questions, and some of them were super weird for an 8 year old. She finally gets her flu shot and only spills a few tears. No major issues so that's a win! She does miss a few sounds on her hearing test, but we decide to just watch it for now. I get my blood drawn when we're done with her appointment and talk to the radiologist about my CT. He says my prior authorization hasn't gone through yet and he'll call me when we can get it scheduled. We're both hopeful it can get done tomorrow. Then I talk to the surgical nurse to get my pre-op instructions. Finally leave the clinic around 12:45. Pick up my surgical prep from the drugstore, $52.06 (!!!) from my flex account. Z requests cheese pizza for lunch so I oblige.
1:17 PM: I get a call about a job and set up an interview for Wednesday afternoon.
4:10: I bring Z down to the local salon for a haircut. I can't go in (COVID restrictions) but Z loves the feel of a fresh cut so I don't worry. Her hair dresser is her classmate's mom and my old neighbor. $18 + $7 tip.
6:30: B has a fireman's meeting tonight, so Z and I have mac and cheese per our tradition. B hates it so we usually only eat it when he's gone. I make Z have an apple on the side so we can make at least one good food choice today. The Bachelor is on tonight! I usually hit the Reddit stream but I got a late start tonight so I skip it.
9:05: Make sure Z brushes her teeth and hug her goodnight.
10:20: My oldest (and crankiest) dog just cannot be pleased tonight. She keeps wanting to go outside, but it's cold and snowy and she doesn't like either of those things. Sigh. Do my usual nighttime routine, take my meds and go to bed. Fall asleep around 11.
Daily total: $33.99
1/19 Tuesday
6:45 AM: Success! Finally got some sleep. Good thing I woke up though, because I forgot to set an alarm. I wake up a very cranky Z at 7 and make sure she gets ready for school. We are very fortunate that our school district is small, and Z has been going to school in person, full time, all school year. She never complains about wearing her mask either. I drop her off at 8, then B and I bring our SUV to the mechanic. I think B is dropping me off at home but instead we go out for breakfast downtown. I have a pancake, scrambled egg and side of fruit. I hear the regulars (old guys who come in every morning for coffee) talking about signing up for their COVID shots. This is a good sign! B pays, $16.04 + $3.96 tip.
9:01: I get an email that a hospital position I applied for has already been filled. Dang. It's still snowing, so I plan for a lazy day. B goes outside to snowblow.
9:55: The radiologist calls and tells me we can get my CT completed. We decide to do it right away this morning. I run up to the clinic to grab my contrast drink and set a timer so I drink the right amounts during the right time frames. It tastes like flat, flavored water. My stomach doesn't seem to appreciate it much. Hopefully this doesn't become a problem when I'm in the CT machine.
11:00: Get my CT done. I get an IV in my arm and the radiologist pushes Lord knows what into my veins, but it makes me feel like I wet my pants 🤣 He lets me check out the images when we're done. It only takes about 15 minutes and then I head back home. I sit around with B for a while, then I go downstairs to make a few crafty things and fill an order. I put a couple more things on my business page as well. During this time B brings his truck out to the mechanic and brings home the SUV. They put in a 'Minnesota approved' battery, the repair cost was $220. I offer B half but he declines, saying "let's see what the truck costs first."
2:45 PM: I get so distracted crafting that I almost forget to go pick Z up from school. She gets in the car and tells me she had the best day ever! I ask what happened, and she says she didn't get strawberries at lunch. Oh... she was being sarcastic. She picks up her room and puts away her laundry when we get home. We don't do much this afternoon.
7:00: B makes supper tonight, nothing fancy. A chicken patty for me and corn dogs for him and Z. I'm staying away from roughage to make my life easier tomorrow. Z gets ready for bed and I tuck her in at 8:45. Shortly after, B leaves for work. I go downstairs to work on a Valentine's day order.
Daily total: $0
1/20 Wednesday
12:45 AM: I have spent far too long organizing files on my computer. I call it a night. I look up my CT report and it doesn't show anything urgent or explain why there's blood in my stool. Sigh. Normal routine and bedtime.
7:05: I'm up. IT'S INAUGURATION DAY! B is already in bed. He tells me he has the chills, is nauseated, and his arm is killing him. I tell him his COVID shot is working and bring him some ibuprofen. I wake up Z and she gets ready for school. While I'm waiting, I take a body shower, let the dogs out and feed them. Drop Z off at school at 8, deliver a Valentine's Day order (+$20!) and go home to watch the inauguration while eating mini wheats.
10:45: I watch Kamala get sworn in and I get tears in my eyes. Such a historic moment.
11:45: I make myself scrambled eggs and drink a Dr. Pepper. After this, it's only clear liquids until tomorrow afternoon. B helps me give my oldest dog a haircut. You'd think we were killing her the way she cries. She's been getting haircuts every 2-3 months her whole life and still can't sit still.
2:00 PM: I have a virtual interview. The job sounds so interesting but it involves a lot of travel, and I'm not sure that would work with my family. I pick up Z from school when I'm done. She tells me "happy Joe Biden day!" when she gets into the car. We talk about the possible new job and she's not into the idea of me being gone.
5:00: B leaves to go work on his brother's house. He's been there on and off all week. He also got the night off for his floating holiday. I take my meds early so they have time to get into my system. I mix up the colonoscopy prep: two packets of powder into one liter of water. I make dinner for Z while I'm in the kitchen.
6:45: COLONOSCOPY PREP IS NASTY. Like, the taste of the drink is so disgusting and it's making me nauseated. I know it's important to keep it down, but it's also important to drink it within the one hour timeframe. Uuggghhhhh. It ends up being one hour and 45 minutes. B comes home around 8:30 and gets Z into bed.
9:00: The best way to describe how I feel is early labor. The cramps come and go and are so intense I have to take deep breaths. It's so exhausting I end up falling asleep.
Daily total: $0
1/21 Thursday
12:30 AM: IT'S TIME.
6:00: I slept between bathroom trips, but now it's time to mix up my second liter of prep. Yes, I have to do this to myself all over again. This time, I have to make sure to drink it all within the one hour timeframe.
7:30: Everybody is awake and chaos ensues. Did I mention we only have one bathroom? Z is trying to get ready for school, B wants to shower and I'm, well, you know. I get my entire liter of prep down in 65 minutes. B is still not feeling well from his COVID shot.
8:45: I manage a body shower although I had to get out once for the toilet. I am basically a zombie at this point. B drops me off at the hospital at 9:10. When I get there, they are running behind so I have to wait half an hour before I get into my room.
10:05: My nurse blows my vein and I have a panic attack. We are starting this day off great. A second nurse comes in and gets my IV in right away, thank God. Things move pretty quickly from here. By 10:30, I'm in the OR getting the good drugs. By 11:20, I'm awake enough to remember what's going on and drinking water so they'll pull my IV. The surgeon comes in and tells me they didn't see anything abnormal, but they did take some biopsies so hopefully I get some answers. By 12:05, I'm walking out the door.
12:15 PM: I am absolutely starving. B takes me out for lunch. I have a tuna sandwich and a 7Up. Our total is something around $17. I throw him $5 for the tip.
1:00: We're home. We spend the afternoon watching movies and laying around. My stomach is still pretty upset from all the torture. B picks up Z from school since I'm not supposed to drive yet. When she gets home, she regales me with the tale of getting hit in the face with a hulu hoop in gym. She actually has a fat lip!
5:00: I get a jar of my favorite eye cream on a BST board, $20.
6:00: B heads out to work and I make supper. We have tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches tonight. Comfort food for the win.
9:00: Z has a quarter in her tonight. We play a couple games on her iPad before I stick her in the shower and then in bed. I promptly fall asleep in the living room.
Daily total: $25
1/22 Friday
3:30 AM: Move downstairs to our bedroom.
8:00: After work, B picked up E and they come home. The dogs are frantic. I eat a bowl of cereal and hang out with Z, since she doesn't have school today. We make funny drawings of each other and she reads me some knock knock jokes. I also get two more interviews set up for next week. I head back to bed around noon. I have to go back to work tonight. I have a block schedule: 7 off, 3 on, 1 off, 3 on, 4 off, 3 on. Our pay periods are adjusted for the night shift, so if I work the weekend that's my 36 hours for the week.
4:30 PM: I'm up. I take a shower and wash my hair. B makes pizza for the kids, another traditional meal timing in our house. He leaves for work at 5:30. I am dreading work. I have been exhausted after every shift no matter if it was busy or not. I'm not sure if it's my actual job, or just the night shift catching up to me. Either way, I'm looking forward to a new position. Also, getting ready for work is a chore these days. I use Fog Block on my glasses, then put side shields on. I hook my two masks up to my ear savers. Then I find two bottles of hand sanitizer and two pens to put in my pockets because I always lose one somewhere along the way. I pack my bag (water bottle, energy drink, iPad, shoes, snacks and supper) and start my car. I say bye to the kids and head out at 5:45.
6:00: Work is already a shit show and I just clocked in 5 minutes ago. I'm so annoyed and I just don't want to be here. But you better believe I'm going to suck it up and be happy for my residents. They are usually pretty happy to see me after my long stretch off.
11:45: I buckle up for what's going to be a very long shift.
Daily total: $0
Weekly total: $597.09
Food + Drink: $177.07
Fun / Entertainment: $60
Home + Health: $203.44
Clothes + Beauty: $45
Transport: $0
Other: $111.58
Reflection: This was a normal week considering its events. Obviously I don't usually buy a new door lock, and I typically only stock up on vape juice every 6 months or so. I'm heavily into my depression spending, but with everything going on in the world I've cut myself some slack. I'm only going to live once! *ETA our cat passed away this evening, 1/25. We are very sad but are happy we got to give her a good life for the last 3 years.

1. use a good mod that gives you total control over your game options (like NTL MOD) then set it up for whatever graphic quality / FPS you can afford.
   
2. never use wifi, instead ethernet cable to your router
   
3. use an operating system that gives you total control (like linux) as windows and macs will always do something behind your back or change things with each little update (even linux does but you can disable, or use a conservative mission critical distro of your choice)
   
4. use bandwidth prioritization on your router and make slither the fastest lane (networking skills needed, router that can support this is needed) this way any family internet traffic will not affect your game (I have lots of devices behind my router with lots of traffic and it doesn't matter, not even when speedtesting while I play, but I hear many people suffering from freezes or sudden high delay ms if people turned on cell-phones, smart tv etc)
   
5. sometimes using a browser based vpn helps (like browsec or veepn) IF your cpu can handle it (it needs to encrypt/reroute traffic so more work for your browser) and you pick the proper endpoint in relation to your slither server
   
6. if you use vpn remember to also get that traffic into the fastest lane in your router (some networking skills needed to make this work properly)
   
7. you can tune vpn even further if the vpn connection is held by your router instead of by your browser (instead of vpn extension use a full vpn client on your router)
   
8. regardless of your OS disable any background activities that would freeze your browser (like background antivirus updates, OS updates, backup jobs). if you use a rotating rust drive instead of SSD or NVME disabling these is especially important. Beware some cheap / junk SSDs are blocking when heated or it is just how they work. better stick to kingston,intel,samsung evo.
   
9. whatever OS you use you can tune the networking for low latency instead of the default optimized for bandwidth (networking / googleing skills needed)
   
10. if on linux tune it for low latency desktop, high hz kernel, disable mitigations, tune networking, use irq balancer, use a network chip that does offloading (intel, broadcam), use nice/renice to favor slither
    
11. use a good supported video card (both for recording and general screen draw) like nvidia. Record / stream using hw encoder, don't waste resources using big applications for this and just use ffmpeg from command line (shell skills needed, perhaps compiling from sources, scripting)
    
12. if you have 4k display or anything larger than fhd (1920x1080) just limit it to fhd when playing as the browser will have less fillrate to work with. Consider using the mod keys [[ and ]] to lower the canvas size (again less pixel fillrate). Also the game is designed for a fix resolution of its main canvas at which point the game looks amazingly well (chat notification will confirm when you reached the best sharpness)
    

Considering the above I can play without lag and freezes even on a laptop from 2008 with a core 2 duo cpu (but with low fps, low graph).
If you want proper setup (high fps and graphics) then have a powerful enough system cpu that gets at least 100k score in jetstream2 javascript benchmark (https://browserbench.org/JetStream/) and remember more base ghz in CPU is better than more cores. Just for reference my current youtube games are played on a 2 year old i9 9900k 8 core cpu at 5ghz turbo and I get a score in this bechmark close to 170k. On my previous 9 year old i7 cpu at 4ghz I get 107k score, then one I did my 460k slither recording. Although the game is still very playable on this old i7 (no lag, no freeze) it cannot handle higher FPS and it suffers from FPS drops (aroud 37-40 fps) when very busy with big snakes and custom skins around so by my current standards (and comparison with my i9) I would not use it for high performance slithering while also recording etc. After all it is a 9 yo computer... 4 years older than the game itself.
Now regardless of the general hardware and networking of the above (which will help with everything not only slither) a browser just for slither is also important and helps, preferably a standalone one that doesn't self update. you can try various versions of chrome and chromium. My mod supports versions even as old as 5x of these browsers. For 60 FPS I recommend an older chromium as it is very fast and for more fancy FPS like 144 or 240 just use the latest chrome. There are some fine tunings for browsers as well for gpu acceleration and such (google skills needed then trial and error), but generally these should be autodetected just fine with proper hardware, drivers, os.
I think the above covers just about everything so you can squeeze out all the performance for the best slithering experience. It certainly helped me all these years. Have fun!

Long time reader, first time poster.
Two months ago, I moved to a new apartment with no wired networking between rooms, and an ISP line termination at the other end of the apartment from where my desktop will be. I decide to splurge and get the Dream Machine, as it has some nifty features for someone who doesn't want to invest in a serious set up, but may like to expand their network in the future.
For two months, it has been fantastic. Easy to set up, fun to play with security features, mess with VLANS and guest portals, and an overall great WiFi experience. Having read this forum quite a bit, I knew to disable auto optimize WiFi and increase DITM to 3, as I have no older clients.
This week how ever, the WiFi has been shocking. Speed tests show my expected 100/40, but latency was through the roof. My work VPN would constantly drop in and out, Zoom calls and live streams would pause, and online gaming became impossible. It was a simillar story on my laptop and phone.
I decided to run some tests, and found when pinging Google's public DNS servers, I was getting 5ms latency for pings that worked, yet somehow was dropping approximately 30% of packets. I swapped to my ISP provided router, WiFi worked without any issues (7ms ping, 0% packet loss). Wired clients have had no issues.
I seperated the 2.5GHz and 5GHz bands, and found that 2.4Ghz works fine, but 5GHz is the same unusable experience. I have done a factory reset, disabled all security features and DPI, and disabled Uplink Connectivity Monitor.
Signal strength is good for 5Ghz (-55dBm) and has plenty of room on the bands from other wireless networks when I did a spectrum analysis. Channel Width is set to VHT80, Channel is set to auto (broadcasting on 42) and power is set to auto.
Dream Machine is on version 1.8.6, Network Controller is on Version 6.0.43, WiFi Experience is at 95% - 98%.
I cannot for the life of me figure out why the 5GHz band has started dropping 30% of packets. I noticed the dashboard had changed last week, which may mean the controller and AP version were updated, which could be causing this.
I'm pretty much ready to return the Dream Machine if a crappy ISP router is out performing it.
Any ideas/help would be much appreciated.
EDIT:
Thanks to nicktmphoto for suggesting to downgrade, this seems to have fixed the issue.
For anyone else with the same issue, make sure SSH is enabled and run either of the following comands:
UDM Base: ubnt-upgrade https://fw-download.ubnt.com/data/udm/28d7-udm-1.8.5-54915c1754f9
UDM Pro: ubnt-upgrade https://fw-download.ubnt.com/data/udm/79fa-udmpro-1.8.5-fe987676fb574953b3276cdbc94070f7.bin
EDIT 2:
I was too hasty, the problem persists still. I have downgraded to 1.8.4 and the issue is still happening. Looks like I am stuck on 2.4GHz until a new release comes out.
Edit 3:
Well downgrading to 1.5.6 seems to have done the trick. 0% packets loss on 1000 packets and a 6ms average latency. I'll update again if it degrades, but pretty unhappy I had to revert to a 10 month old release.

Hello, my name is Zak and I'm an addict. I'm not really one for talking about myself or the "here's my story" kind of person, but today there is something inside me yelling at me to post this. Maybe someone really needs to see this and hopefully it will inspire them to make the leap themselves.
5 years, nearly 2,000 days consecutively, I fell asleep next to a bottle of liquor. The beginning was easy. I was 19 and it was normal in my friend group to party everyday. It wasn't until years later that my problem started to become obvious. My best friends had started graduating college, getting married, having kids, starting their lives. Me? I had a different group of drinking buddies for every bar within a 10 mile radius of my house. I had my day drinking group. I had my "lets party for 3 days straight" group. Alcohol was the fuel that sparked every romantic and emotional relationship I had, and the same fuel that inevitably burned them. It was still hard for me to see how bad my problem was. I had surrounded my entire life with people just like me. It seemed normal. I still worked enough to get my rent paid, so I was fine.. right?
And then we get to year 5.
The year the alcohol finally caught up with my body. The year I couldn't get out of bed until hours after I woke up. The year where I could progressively feel my body breaking down more and more each day. I was always hungover. I'd wake up sore, sweating, shaking, head pounding, heart fluttering. It felt as if every second I spent sober was a constant panic attack. It hurt to move. I would try to go a night without drinking, but that would just lead to more anxiety, more heart palpitations and brain fog. All the while the thought "This can all go away if you drink" bouncing vigorously around in my cerebellum. Fast forward another month to me waking up late for work, in so much pain that I needed a few shots to even brush my teeth (if i remembered to). Fast forward to my younger sister asking me why I was drunk at 10am at a family breakfast. Fast forward to 6 months straight of drinking all day everyday.
I spend those 6 months feeling absolutely helpless, worthless, and disgusted with myself. It wasn't always easy to keep myself supplied with all of the liquor I needed to get through a day so I had to get creative with how I acquired it. Most days I bought enough to get me through around 30 hours, but when I ran low and it was too late to buy more I simply "borrowed" what my roommates had stashed. It was never stealing in my mind. Well- not until I sobered up enough to realize what I'd done. I'd always had intentions of replacing what I drank that wasn't mine. Rarely was I able too. I would often wake up to my roommates yelling and arguing with each other. I've never been shot, but hearing your roommates yelling things like "He's a thief", "Worthless drunk", "He just needs to get the **** out", "I'm so done with this guy" when you already hate yourself and feel like you have absolutely zero control over who you are or what you do.... had me considering the option of buying a one-way ticket.
Then I woke up.
To this day I still can't explain it. I shot out of bed from a dead sleep. I was in tears? I was terrified for someone reason. I took a glance around my room to the cluttered jungle of dirty clothes, uber eats bags, and liquor bottles that had completely consumed every inch of walking space. It was gut wrenching. "I don't want to live like this" " This isn't me" "I didn't mean to get like this.." It was as if someone else had been controlling my body for the past 5 years and all of a sudden I woke up in control again. Like I had passed out 2000 days ago and I woke up in a real life nightmare. It was the second most horrifying experience of my life, however, much needed. For the first time I realized that if I don't do something and do it IMMEDIATLY I'm probably not going to live much longer, and if I do, it won't be a life worth living.
This was the first time I truly accepted within myself that I had a problem I could not fix on my own. I was terrified to do it, but I reached out to my family and told them everything. I was morbidly ashamed to admit everything. Scared sh*tless of what they would think of me. Turns out? They knew all along. They have been waiting so long for me to make that call. Within an hour my mom had found a rehab facility in Dallas Tx covered by my insurance and asked me what I thought. I signed up immediately.
10Hr drive from home to party prison. My sentence, 30 days.
Remember how I said that thing about the SECOND most horrifying experience of my life? Yep, that's because alcohol withdrawal takes the cake, the icing, the plate, the baker, and the whole damn town. It was the worst experience I have ever gone through and nothing even remotely comes close. (Oh, and my withdrawal symptoms where considered mild) Imagine 4 days straight of absolutely zero sleep and symptoms that mirror a severe panic attack but times 10 and it doesn't end. 4 days straight of shaking, head aches, brain fog, heart fluttering out of your chest non stop, sweating, and severe anxiety. It doesn't seem to end and it's full force CONSTANTLY. The only thing you can think about is whether your heart is going to stop, explode, or if you're going to have a seizure. It will absolutely humble you.
After a week of withdrawals it's time to start classes at rehab. They kept us on a very strict 8am-9pm schedule to limit our free time (even weekends) It's a very challenging experience. It's 13 hours a day where you're digging deep into yourself to learn how to deal with the thoughts you were running from while drinking. Things you don't want to think about. It's a tough thing to do and not to my surprise there were many people there that couldn't make it through a week. It's something you have to be 100% ready to face, and ready I was.
During this time, my love for rocket league returned in full stride. A game I had all but given up on while I was drinking. I didn't have much free time, but you best believe that I spent nearly every minute of it playing RL on my laptop. It was the PERFECT escape. I wasn't allowed wifi there, so I spent all my time listening to music, messing around in freeplay, and flying through rings. For the first time I felt like I finally had a healthy way to unwind and clear my head. Something about doing spins while flying through rings to the beat of good music was just relaxing. I found myself increasingly more eager to to start playing competitive again once I return to the real world.
And then there I was. I had just one more day left in rehab. I was feeling like an entirely new person. Eating healthy, sleeping regularly, and exercising daily REALLY made and impact on me. I was feeling better than ever and bursting with excitement about what my new life in sobriety will bring. I was ready to get back home. Unfortunately, home wasn't ready for me. I received a call that day from my roommates that I can't go back. A completely fair and just decision on their part. The timing was just unfortunate. They were unaware I was getting out and thought I would of had more time to find a place to live. Now here I was, standing outside of rehab with all my bags, no car, nowhere to go, 10 hours away from home. Great.
I will admit, I wanted to drink. I was scared. I looked back to what I had learned over the past 30 days. You see..
Sometimes, the world likes to throw one last punch at you right as you're about to make it. You have to remember that the only impact anything ever has on your life.. Is how YOU respond.
I got an uber and I went straight to a hotel. Instead of drinking, I went to my room, pulled out my laptop, blasted some tunes, and did some motherfcking spins in some motherfcking rings.
Later that night I got a phone call from my uncle. He just so happened to know someone in Dallas who lived in an oxford (sober) house and was looking for a roommate immediately. To get the room you had to pass an open interview that was happening THAT NIGHT. The interview I passed for the room I still live in, happily, with my sober roommates. The opportunity I would have missed had I went out for a beer instead of rocket league.
Adjusting wasn't the easiest. I had a place to live but I never intended on moving 10 hours away. I got depressed. I missed my friends, my family. This was at the peak of covid, so it was really difficult to meet new people as well. I spent a lot of time alone. During this time I played a LOT of Rocket League. I met a lot of people online and in a way I actually prefer it. I have a really genuine circle of people I play with almost nightly. Man let me tell you, I never thought I would laugh as hard as I do most nights SOBER, with people I've never even met in person. It's surreal. I know it might sound cheesy, but literally in my perspective Rocket League has given me an outlet when I needed it the most. Instead of "I can't wait to get home and open a beer" It's "I can't wait to get home and show the boys this meme"
Rocket League has become my ultimate stress relief. It opened a door to an amazing world for me with amazing people. It's given me peace and friendship. It's given me a sense of belonging, and brought passion for competition back into someone who not long ago didn't care enough to even get up to brush their teeth everyday. So much of who I am has been sparked back into life and it's all because of Rocket League.
Here I am a while later, still sober, with a happy home, and still spinning through rings and I'm not looking back.
A sober champion in game and IRL
And I can not express just how incredibly thankful I am.
-Zak
If anyone reads this, and you are struggling, please know that you are absolutely not alone. My inbox is always open if you need someone to talk to, but I would highly encourage you to consider telling someone you trust what is going on. Odds are, they already know and they are just waiting for the opportunity for you to let them help you. Addiction is tough as shit. You can do this <3
EDIT: @Everyone, I'm trying my best to respond to everyone that I can. Thank you so, so much for taking the time to read this and thank you so much for your support.
I've had a lot of people reach out to me sharing their own story, asking for advice, and sharing their own advice. It's an absolute beautiful thing and something I think needs to be made available at all times.
I will be putting together a discord server and starting a "Rockets Anonymous" group. (If you are good with discord and want to help set it up please let me know!)
The function of the group will be to have a safe anonymous group populated with people who want to share the bond of recovery and love of soccar. The only requirements to join are a desire to stop drinking and to respect the anonymity of fellow members.
This will not be an official AA group, but I will do my best to incorporate AA elements where I can. The main goal of the group is to have a safe place to talk, vent, and game. You can share stories, read others stories, offer advice, ask for advice etc. Just a group of rocket league players here to support each other and lift them up.
If you would like to join, please DM me your Discord info directly and I'll make sure you get added. (Will take a little time to get the server up)
Much love <3
The Discord is up!!!!!
https://discord.gg/zKe9dtw

I was an eero user for a little over two years and decided to try out Ubiquiti’s UniFi line of networking gear. I’ve had my UniFi setup for about two weeks and thought I’d share my experience.
Motivation: The reason for me moving over to UniFi was not for stability as one might expect. For my eero setup I had a Gen 2 Pro and two beacons and a Gen 2 cupcake that had a hardwired backhaul. So I didn’t experience all of the stability issues that the eero 6 people had (are having). The main reason for me moving was because I wanted more control and insight into my network. Over the last year I’ve gotten into home automation and have accumulated dozens of WiFi light switches, plugs, locks, etc. All in all I have about 60 clients connected to my network at any given time. Managing these clients, seeing what they’re doing, what they’re connected to, etc. was virtually impossible to do in the eero app. And because I had all of these IoT devices, I wanted to make sure they were as segregated as possible from my main network. I thought about using the guest network in eero but that’s an all or nothing network and I still needed to have some targeted connectivity to the main network.
UniFi Setup: My house is not that big (~1800sqft single story) so my coverage needs are not that big. I do have a detached office that I built as my COVID summer project which has CAT6 run to it (the office is what had my eero cupcake). Another important point is that wireless speed is not that important to me. Most devices that I have that need the speed (server, iMac, work laptop, game consoles) are are all hardwired into Ethernet ports in my office.
I decided to go with a UniFi Dream Machine (UDM) as my main router. It includes a gateway/router, a wireless AP, a 4-port switch, and a cloud key controller (the software component that monitors and controls your network). This is placed dead center of the house and provides good coverage for pretty much every room. For my office I got the USW-16 PoE switch to handle all of my servers, desktops, and other hardwired connections. Finally, I got the UAP-AC-IW access point to give wireless connectivity to the office and backyard (this, like most UniFi AP’s, is powered via PoE).
Setting these up was surprisingly easy. I did the initial configuration of the UDM while attached to the eero network and just did a double NAT. I created three wireless networks (main, IoT, and NoT) and initially configured them to be on the same vlan for simplicity sake. I added all of my clients to the new networks and then cutover, removing the eero and connecting the cable modem directly to the UDM. I then installed the 16 port switch (replacing an old unmanaged TPlink switch) in the office, connected everything, and the UDM immediately saw it allowed me to “adopt” it into the network. I then installed the AP in the office and again, it was immediately recognized and adopted.
The most time consuming part by far was getting all of the clients connected to the new network because they were different SSID’s and passwords. Had I kept the same SSID/password as my eero, the whole process would have taken less than hour.
Pros of the UniFi: 1. Control. OMG the control you have over your network is amazing. The ability to create multiple SSID’s and attach them to different networks provides security for the IoT devices that you’re just not sure about. You can create complex firewall rules at multiple levels to make sure traffic doesn’t get in/out when you don’t want it to. 2. Insights: You can easily search on any attribute (IP, name, MAC address) and you see real time stats and info on your devices. You can easily force a device to connect to a specific AP or force a disconnect if you’ve roamed and want your client to pickup a new AP. And you can do this from your phone or computer. 3. Threat Management: if something suspicious either tries to enter or leave your network, it’ll tell you. I gotta say, I was a little freaked out when I saw potential exploits being aimed at my IP (mostly all automated) as soon as I was connected but the UniFi simply drops the packets at the front door. And if it’s a false alarm, you can easily suppress that particular signature without disabling all together. 4. You schedule when you want firmware updates to happen (need I say more?) 5. No reliance on cloud. You can use their cloud service to connect to your network and configure but it’s not mandatory. You can easily turn that off and just have local access. 6. Everything is modular. If I decide I want a WiFi 6 AP, I just have to add the AP. I don’t need to buy a whole new routesystem.
Cons of the UniFi: 1. This is enterprise grade software/hardware in that it gives you more configuration options than you probably need. While initial setup was basic, it does get pretty daunting when you look at all the the things you can do. You do need more than just a basic level of network admin experience to get the most out of it. 2. Stability is a problem for UniFi too. You can tell they jam as much functionality as they can as fast as they can. Not all firmware is rock solid. I updated the switch’s firmware a few days after I had everything installed and I started getting random reboots. After trying to troubleshoot I eventually downgraded the firmware (yes you can do that!) and things seem to be better now. 3. The network stats/insights don’t seem to be that accurate. At one point it said my iPad had downloaded 200GB in less than 5 minutes. 4. Tons of products and it’s not clear what you need. I never thought I’d say it but this is a case where there are almost too many options. Go look at their website and just browse the AP’s...they over 20 different AP’s you can buy. This is partially why I went with the UDM...so I didn’t have to make too many decisions.
Conclusion: So far I’m pretty happy with the switch and I’m enjoying playing around with the new features. As I said it’s only been a couple of weeks so we’ll see if that remains. I have three kids at home doing school so stability is everything to me. I still have my eero hardware and won’t hesitate to go back if things start going south. If you’re thinking of switching and have a knack for networking, I would definitely recommend giving Ubiquiti a try. Just be prepared. If all you want is a turn key, set it and forget it network, I would still recommend eero to all my non-techy family and friends.