What is The Weekly Mock Draft?
Every Wednesday/Thursday of the season (starting today and ending after Week 17), I will post a mock draft. The order is determined by Tankathon (record and SOS) and will be updated weekly as well. This will be used as a tool to determine how the stocks of the top prospects changed throughout the year and for the fans to have something to look forward to once football games are over for the week. The teams will pick players as if they are drafting today. Enjoy!
1. Jacksonville: Trevor Lawrence, QB, Clemson
Trevor Lawrence is the ultimate prize of the 2021 NFL Draft and if the Jaguars are sitting at the top, their choice will be easy. Lawrence is one of the most gifted QBs we've seen in recent years, with a perfect vision of the field and an amazing arm. There are no issues about his size, considering he stands tall at 6'6" and his pros easily outweigh the cons, like under-throwing deep passes.
2. Washington: Penei Sewell, OT, Oregon
If Washington ends up picking at 2, it would most likely be because Dwayne Haskins was a failure or if the offensive line failed to protect him. In this case, the latter happens and the team brings in an exceptionally talented blocker in Sewell. This was also maximize Antonio Gibson's success in the backfield, as Sewell serves as a great run lane anchor. In the end, Washington gets a replacement for Trent Williams that makes his teammates better.
3. Cincinnati: Ja'Marr Chase, WR, LSU
The best player available here is Micah Parsons but the Bengals can wait to address LB after a few rounds. With Sewell off the board, Cincinnati takes a look at LSU standout Ja'Marr Chase. The Bengals have two competent WRs in Green and Boyd and a promising rookie in Higgins but we don't know if Green will be the same Pro Bowler he was years ago after his recent injuries. He will also be a free agent after this season and they could very well bring him back but Chase already has chemistry with Burrow and fits the youth movement in Cincinnati, so whether A.J. Green is a Bengals uniform next year, Chase should be selection regardless.
4. Carolina: Justin Fields, QB, Ohio State
Teddy Bridgewater is a great backup. He can be a decent starter but he is not the guy that will take the Panthers to the Super Bowl while McCaffrey is in his prime. McCaffrey will most likely be carrying the team to however many games they win but until we see if Bridgewater can help this team win, the Panthers absolutely need to draft a QB. Fields is one of the most impressive prospects in this draft and teaming him up with McCaffrey will give the team an astronomical boost.
5. NY Giants: Micah Parsons, LB, Penn State
The Giants had Isaiah Simmons in their lap back in April but opted for an OT to protect Daniel Jones and allow Saquon Barkley to play to his full potential. That decision could end up being one of the smartest Dave Gettleman has ever made, as Parson will be theirs for the taking next year. They do have a hole at CB after the release of Baker but Parson is too good to pass up at 5.
6. Miami: Gregory Rousseau, EDGE, Miami
Gregory Rousseau gets to stay in Miami but this time in a Dolphins jersey. One of Miami's biggest needs is an EDGE that can consistently get to the passer. Rousseau has spectacular length and a large tackle radius, making him a better defender. He still has room to develop but that will be easy if he learns under a defensive-minded head coach like Brian Flores.
7. Detroit: Dylan Moses, LB, Alabama
Detroit made a great move signing Jamie Collins Sr. to bolster their LB room but he is being complemented Jarrad Davis and Christian Jones, both of whom are okay but not exactly franchise cornerstones. Moses will bring his superb instincts and power to a young and blossoming Lions defense that desperately needs all the help they can get.
8. NY Jets: Caleb Farley, CB, Virginia Tech
The Jets secondary suffered a big hit after trading away Jamal Adams but luckily, they drafted Ashtyn Davis and they also have Marcus Maye, who had a breakout year in 2019. However, CB is one of their worst positions, as the current starters are Pierre Desir and Blessuan Austin. Brian Poole is a solid slot corner but Desir and Austin are not long-term options. Farley has extraordinary footwork for a player new to the position and displays a great bend of skills, size, and length.
9. Las Vegas: Trey Lance, QB, North Dakota State
Derek Carr is a great QB and the Raiders are hoping they can finally reach the playoffs after adding a speedy receiver in Henry Ruggs III but if they end up picking at 9, Carr might be the scapegoat. If the Raiders can get Lance here, they'll send the card to Cleveland in record time.
10. LA Chargers: Patrick Surtain II, CB, Alabama
The Chargers secondary is stacked, featuring the likes of Chris Harris Jr. and Casey Hayward Jr. but the former is only under contract for two seasons and if he leaves, a hole could be left. The AFC West is also home to many young and promising receivers like Sutton, Jeudy, and Ruggs III so adding a CB like Surtain II would be a welcome addition.
11. Denver: Tyson Campbell, CB, Georgia
After the departure of Chris Harris Jr., Denver is left with Bouye and Callahan as their starting CBs. Bouye is not the same player he was in 2017 and Callahan isn't looking a future star, so Campbell will be the obvious selection.
12. Arizona: Marvin Wilson, IDL, Florida State
Wilson is a borderline top 10 prospect but since this draft is more oriented toward QBs and CBs, it's very likely he falls to Arizona just outside the top 10. The Cardinals have a great defense but their defensive line isn't anything special and adding a mobile IDL like Wilson will keep the defense young and powerful.
13. Atlanta: Quincy Roche, EDGE, Miami
It would be ideal for Atlanta to trade back and take Roche but there are no trades in this mock draft, so the Falcons will have to reach for the other explosive EDGE from Miami. Whether you get Rousseau or Roche, you're still getting a possible franchise anchor on defense.
14. Houston → MIA: DeVonta Smith, WR, Alabama
After addressing EDGE with their first pick, Miami adds Too Tagovailoa's teammate at Alabama, DeVonta Smith. The shifty 6'1" receiver offers lots of potential and could end up being an offensive game-changer.
15. Cleveland: Creed Humphrey, IOL, Oklahoma
Humphrey is an intelligent player with much needed leadership skills and will certainly keep Baker Mayfield and Nick Chubb healthy for years to come. While he has disadvantages such as being left handed and having an uncontrollable momentum, his strengths are too great and beat out any doubts.
16. Chicago: Rondale Moore, WR, Purdue
Rondale Moore will get the attention CeeDee Lamb got for being a RAC machine but it looks like he will be drafted earlier. When he has the ball in his hands, he looks like a seasoned RB with quick feet and explosiveness. The starting WRs for the Bears this year are Allen Robinson II, Anthony Miller, and Ted Ginn Jr., which is not the receiver trio you should expect much success with. Robinson II is phenomenal but his contract expires after this year and they will be lucky to keep him. Even then, WR is a big need for Chicago.
17. LA Rams → JAX: Pat Freiermuth, TE, Penn State
The Jaguars have to fix most of their offense and while they will have to replace Ngakoue in this draft, they decide to go with the best player available in Pat Freiermuth, the polished 6'5" TE from Penn State. There are some people who have compared him to a lite version of Rob Gronkowski and if he lives up to the expectations, Jacksonville will have an exciting young QB-TE tandem for many years to come.
18. Minnesota: Jaylen Twyman, IDL, Pittsburgh
Michael Pierce is a solid DT but since he will be opting out, the starters are Shamar Stephen and Jaleel Johnson. Minnesota should definitely keep an eye on a dynamic pass rusher like Twyman. The Vikings defense is getting older and needs a good dose of youth injection.
19. Indianapolis: Shaun Wade, CB, Ohio State
Rock Ya-Sin had an okay rookie year and could develop within the next few years and Xavier Rhodes is in town but let's face it, he went from hero to zero and was one of the worst CBs in the league last year. The Colts are in a good position here as Wade is the best player available and fits a big need.
20. Tennessee: Christian Barmore, IDL, Alabama
The Titans have a promising defense that could be among the best in a couple years if their young players develop at a favorable pace but they still aren't set on the defensive line. The rock solid Christian Barmore is an elite interior defender that displays great versatility and he might even become too good a prospect to be available at 20.
21. Buffalo: Wyatt Davis, IOL, Ohio State
This pick will be simple for Buffalo. Their IOL consists of LG Quinton Spain, mediocre C Mitch Morse, and a replaceable RG in Brian Winters. Thankfully, the best of the three, Morse, is under contract for a while and Winters is a free agent after this season. Spain is the worst of the three and needs to be replaced immediately. The Bills need to keep Josh Allen, who will likely be cemented as the franchise QB after this year, healthy and drafting Davis fits that need.
22. Seattle → NYJ: Rashod Bateman, WR, Minnesota
Sam Darnold was a contender for the top picking the 2018 NFL Draft but so far, he has been underwhelming. You could just pinpoint the blame on him but you need to also realize that he hasn't had any dependable receivers. Since 2018, his best option has been Robby Anderson. Enough said. You could consider Bateman a very slight reach here as they could trade down a few spots and still get him, but with the Packers just two spots behind them, the risk would be even greater. Instead, the Jets make it simple and select an exciting WR for Darnold to throw to.
23. Philadelphia: Paulson Adebo, CB, Stanford
The Eagles landed Darius Slay in a blockbuster trade this offseason but his counterpart in the backfield is Avonte Maddox, who definitely needs to be replaced as soon as possible. The only other player that could be in contention to be selected here is Alabama WR Jaylen Waddle but Adebo is a better prospect and fixes a gaping hole at CB.
24. Green Bay: Jaylen Waddle, WR, Alabama
A year after shocking the league and trading up for QB Jordan Love, the Packers finally draft a WR to pair with Davante Adams. Whether this helps Aaron Rodgers win a championship or not, as long as Waddle doesn't completely bust, the future QB will have a receiver to grow with.
25. Tampa Bay: Travis Etienne, RB, Clemson
While Fournette is one of the better RBs in the league, he isn't Christian McCaffrey good and could certainly not be a Buccaneer next season. His contract is only good for one season and considerings it's the NFL, you never know what will happen. This mock draft will consider RB a need for the Buccaneers, so the team brings in Clemson standout Travis Etienne.
26. Dallas: Hamsah Nasirildeen, S, Florida State
Dallas suffered big hits in the backfield this offseason with the departures of Byron Jones and Jeff Heath. At the S position, their starters are Darian Thompson and Xavier Woods. Although Woods is decent, Thompson is not expected to be an important piece. Nasirildeen is a perfect fit for the Cowboys and will add to a bright, young secondary that added Trevon Diggs through this year's draft.
27. New England: Jay Tufele, IDL, USC
New England could very well take the best player available, Alex Leatherwood, even though OT is not a pressing need but instead, they opt to bolster their defensive line with the powerful Jay Tufele. Lining him up alongside Lawrence Guy will create a nightmare for opposing offensive lines.
28. Pittsburgh: Alex Leatherwood, OT, Alabama
After falling a few spots farther than expected, the Steelers see their golden opportunity so snatch up Alex Leatherwood. These next few years will be Ben Roethlisberger's last chance to compete for a Super Bowl and to aid him in doing so, the Steelers need to draft a sturdy protector like Leatherwood. Alejandro Villanueva and Zach Banner are both reliable but they hit free agency together next year and the Steelers are more likely to give Banner the bigger contract. If Villanueva ends up leaving, Pittsburgh has to address the OT position here.
29. New Orleans: Kyle Pitts, TE, Florida
The Saints are in a similar position as the Steelers. They both have aging QBs that have to try and win it all within the next couple years, except the Saints are set at OT. Jared Cook has been reliable in the Saints offense but he is 33 years old and this is the last year of his contract. They will probably look at an LB like Cameron McGrone but that would be too big of a reach at 29 so Pitts is the smart choice.
30. Baltimore: Aidan Hutchinson, EDGE, Michigan
If a WR like Jaylen Waddle is available here, the Ravens will take him in an instant. However, Waddle went to the Packers and the Ravens decide to settle for the impressive power rusher from Michigan, Aidan Hutchinson. Scouts have some concerns about his inexperience, only starting 13 games, and the fact that he needs to become a more diverse pass rusher, but that isn't something the Ravens coaching staff can't fix.
31. San Francisco: Paris Ford, S, Pittsburgh
The 49ers will target Hutchinson but since he was selected right before them, they have to opt for Paris Ford, an outstanding game-changer from Pittsburgh. San Francisco is a Super Bowl contender and if they want to keep competing, they have to draft defense and add youth, mainly in the secondary. Ford brings many things to the field, such as speed and versatility, a welcome addition to the best defense in the league.
32. Kansas City: Dillon Radunz, OT, North Dakota State
The Chiefs have a quality offensive line but both of their OTs, Eric Fisher and Mitchell Schwartz, become free agents in 2022. The Chiefs are most likely going to give Schwartz a big payday and Fisher could be on his way out of town for a paycheck elsewhere, possibly offering more money than Kansas City could've given him, considering their cap situation. This is where Radunz comes in, filling in at LT, and he displays excellent qualities like competitiveness and toughness, both of which fit the Chiefs culture perfectly.

Rachel Schneider
ENG 477
Date 1/11/2021
Marsha Blackburn
A Writing Portfolio
I want to write my own fiction stories one day; I have had a book or two swimming around in my head so I will put the computer to good use and get that typed out one of these days. In this instance I chose my 5 stories and even though one is a marketing inquiry I had fun writing it, so here are my things and some background some of them.
Resume: It is a basic one because my photo ones were not particularly good, and this is an honest resume besides the ones I made for class and I did fudge on those.
Cover letter: I made up the cover letter though there is a penguin Books but it is always fun to use your imagination!
Hike with Drew: I got the concept from a Writer’s Digest and entered it into a contes I never got a response but good practice.
Short Story Vegas: Was one I did for another class but in here I changed it and the story was much better the second time.
Marketing Flyer: This was fun to do those are stock photos of the dogs and squeaky toys, but I like Pit Bulls and dog toys are fun as well.
Scott part 1-This is a story I am working on with another writer, warning its very sexy and some naughty words are in there as well.
Writing Samples: I made these three samples up one day because as I have looked for writing work, I have seen people want a sample of your work, so I came up with these.
Rachel
Schneider
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3867 Houghton Ave Riverside CA 92501 📷
951-743-8911 📷
[email protected] 📷
Rachel Schneider 📷
Rachel7Tori-Twitter 📷
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Objective
To get a career going in the fiction/short story writing industry my imagination can run with any scenario and to write is to live.
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Education
Bachelor of Arts in English | Grand Canyon University
2017 – 2021
Took 15 different writing courses, creative writing and even two fun marketing classes all to polish up my craft. Carried a 3.0 GPA and did the courses all online as well.
No Degree Obtained | Riverside Community College
June 1994 – December 1996
Took these college courses but did not finish got 32 Units of Child Development Courses though which is what I was going for
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Experience
Cafeteria Worker 1
2008 Currently Employed.
Cook, Prep, serve food in a middle school setting, also clean, count inventory and do next day prep, cash handling and POS register experience.
Bell Ringer | Salvation Army
November 2007 – December 2007
Rang bell and collected donations for the salvation Army in front of various stores during the holiday season.
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Skills
Food handlers Card
CPR First Aid certified
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Grammar Proficiency
Spelling Proficiency
Can work from home
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Activities
Have good use of social media and can help update or bring in new followers with my creative writing side. Have a Reddit account as well with 30 stories up on that site. Can speak a little Spanish and Hebrew as well.
951-743-8911
[email protected]
3867 Houghton Ave Riverside CA 92501
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Rachel Schneider

Writer

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Penguin Books

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Dear JENNIFER MCGREGOR,

1/21/2021
Jennifer McGregor
Fiction Publisher
4587 Tropicana Rd.
Las Vegas NV 89102
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I have included my resume for the short story writer for young adult novels. It has been a few years, but I currently work in a middle school, so I do see all the angst and sass that goes with being a young teen. I do hope my writing samples can help me move to the top of the list. I look forward to working with Penguin Books and letting kids know being a teen is hard at first, but it does not last forever.
Sincerely,
Rachel Schneider
Rachel Schneider
3867 Houghton Ave
Riverside CA 92501
It had been a long cold winter Drew and I could not get out for a morning hike till today. Being 75 degrees, we did not have to wear many layers. He is an extremely sweet inquisitive boy who always asks a lot of questions. Why does moss grow on the north side of trees” he asks? Its times like this when it would be nice to have my husband here, but he is overseas where the work is. “well, it’s not just the north side it’s on the shadier side because that is where the moisture is.”
On we went looking at snails on the ground watching the deer pass by along a ridge. Being quiet as to not startle them. “Mom he whispered it’s a bunny den they are coming out for food, he leaves a few carrot and lettuce scraps from last night’s dinner. I walked down the path and spotted some glorious Blue Jays and a Downey Woodpecker. “Listen Drew the woodpecker is getting the bugs out of the trees.” My sweet Drew was staring at the Bunnies, they are cute and fluffy after all. We followed our path down further after the bunnies went back to the den.
The skies were getting cloudy, so I hoped the rain was not going to come back. Though the weather report said there was a chance. My little explorer with his school uniform on was undeterred, I wish I could wear shorts on a 75 day and not be cold, it is always nice to be young. Walking along our path we spot some squirrels running in circles around the tree. “Why do the chase each other like that” Drew asks. “Maybe it’s a game for them like ring around the Rosie.”
On we trek to our favorite stream where the deer family are taking their drinks. I tell Drew we cannot skip stones right now we do not want to scare them. We look through the grass for more of his favorite bugs, saw some worms just below the dirt by a tree. Looking up we see a big spider web being made between two branches. The crows were making their calls in the distance. We are finally able to skip our stones in the stream. He gets some great skips going, and we collect some new rocks for our little garden back home.
Walking past the stream we climb up the embankment and up along the ridge where we see a Fox off in the distance. He or she walks the opposite direction we are going so it is a relief we can continue to the clearing. Where there are more bugs, rocks, and Bunnies. We pass the Deer family as they run up the hill to were, they mostly frolic or maybe they live up there. We stop for a snack of Apples, Almonds, and some cheese sticks. When we were finished Drew put a couple of slices in his pocket to feed the Bunnies, I am sure.
“Mommy we’re getting to the clearing now we can see the Bunnies and the last time Daddy, and I were here I got some neat rocks too.” Drew told ne enthusiastically, I did love his passion for nature, though again my husband is much better at the nature stuff. I am a pastry Chef ask me about desserts and I am your woman, about why moss grows on trees and hello Google. Since Dad is unavailable, I step in and let him explore and see the world outside of the house and off the screen.
It is just another half mile and it is on to the clearing. He starts to pull me hand a little harder I know he is excited. We pass under the tree I glance up and see the Fox again. Then we stop and see “Daddy home……
Name: Rachel Schneider
Course: ENG 361
Date: 4/14/2020
Instructor: Debbie Graves
One Week In Las Vegas
The countdown started Friday at 2pm I got the week off from this thing I call a job (just over broke). The car was packed, it was time to hit the road. The traffic was average and climbing the Cajon Pass was not that bad. I stopped in Baker to have my favorite meal at Bob’s Big Boy, the chili spaghetti, no onions. After making my way back on the highway the traffic picked up going out of Baker, through to Primm and Stateline. I had to stop for gas at Whiskey Pete’s, so I also went in and got some snack goodies. My favorite trail mix and some cheese potato chips because vending machines are too expensive. The road was beckoning so off I went, traveling through Jean is always nice, not much to see. A prison, a few remaining casinos, some outbuildings, and a truck stop. There slogan was always fun 40 smiles closer than Vegas. You can get bored so be sure to pack some music you can have your own car concert. “I’ll face it with a grin I’m never giving in, on with the show” (Show Must Go on by Queen)
Finally, the Vegas skyline is in sight, the lights are not on yet, but they will be needing to navigate around the strip. I do say a few words the terrible drivers. This vacation was so needed my job is crazy, my kids are older now and do not need mom around anymore. Off they went to grandma’s house and I booked the week at the Delano, it is attached to the Mandalay bay so perfect access to all the fun of the strip, and just enough luxury to not look cheap. Getting the valet to take the car I check into my genuinely nice room I have a great view of the Luxor light (that comes off the top of the hotel) and the Excalibur. Now off to indulge in that genuinely nice bathtub and get some overdue reading done. My bathroom with a view has the Luxor light and that is the brightest light on the Vegas strip it comes right out of the top of the Pyramid shaped hotel. A brightness of 42.3 billion candela, you could read a paper from 10 miles straight up if you wanted to.
Once I was well soaked and finished with my chapters it was time to find something to eat besides my snack foods. After cruising the room service options, I settled on some Mexican food of chorizo and eggs with nice corn tortillas. That hit the spot so with the extra energy it was time to get out for a stroll of the property. The indoor pool is nice but small and I want to soak up the sunshine and get some exercise so I shall hit the outdoor pool tomorrow. Back in the lobby I grab those ads for things to do in the city so I can plan out the rest of my trip. There are thousands of things to do in Vegas. Do not be disappointed if you do not get everything done, that is what the next trip is for. I have a beautiful week and I want to have a good time and not have to wait for anybody, I can do what I want. I got those and cruised up through the lobby and toward the casino on my way there I saw a sign for a food and wine festival. With that guy Zac from the travel channel. Thinking hmm I did not know he was interested in food or wine. I went down and found my favorite penny slot game Lucky cat. After 15 minutes I came out putting 20 in and winning 500, so I called it a night and went to the bar to catch a hockey game and grab a fun fruity drink (I like tequila sunrise, (Tequila, grenadine, and cranberry juice). As I am rooting for the Golden Knights (local Vegas hockey team) I looked over to my left and there was Zac from the travel channel, and he likes hockey too this is awesome, and I am trying not to be a fan girl.
The game was in intermission and the Knights were winning so it was time for a new fruity drink so this time I turned around to get back to the bar and bumped right into Zac, boy was my face red. After some apologies and an offer to buy my next fruity drink (a Strawberry Daiquiri) it was a yes and I spilled that I was a fan. He told me he does have an interest in food and wine not just chasing ghosts with his crew. We had some great conversation and when the game came back on, we both sat in the booth cheering the golden knights to their victory. Now I am buzzed and standing up was going to be fun, but Zac was a true gentleman and helped me to my feet. He offered to buy me dinner. The Taco Hut was a good place the tortillas were fresh, and the company was so cool. The conversation turned to food, wine, travel, and some stuff about me. The midnight hour rolled around, and Zac had an early morning, so we said goodnight, but he was staying one floor above me, so we agreed to go to the diner in the lobby for breakfast or brunch. At 10am I was enjoying my company and this great stick to your ribs breakfast (scrambled eggs, sausage, hash browns and some great watermelon) The food offerings in Vegas are so varied you can get everything from a hot dog and beer for 1.99 at the Orleans, to a 5-star meal at Caesar’s Palace the buffets are great too. Although sometimes you want a nice sit-down dinner.
The conversation was effortless the attraction was deep. We made plans to see each other again after the food contest he was judging was over. Saying goodbye was a bit hard but the hand holding was sweet and made me feel like a schoolgirl again. After saying goodbye and I did watch him walk into the convention hall I went back to my room to plan out the rest of my day. I chose a tour of the Mob Museum, they say that Vegas was built with Mob money, but it was a Mormon founded town that later Hollywood discovered. Then many people in Hollywood who were well connected (such as East Coast mobsters) financed Bugsy Segal to build the Flamingo Hotel. As I was putting my shoes on, I got a knock on the room door and as I opened it, I got some flowers (pink roses) and an all-access pass to the food and wine festival courtesy of Zac. Let us just say the Mob Museum can wait for later I got to go to a food and wine festival and spend the rest of the week with Zac. “hi Zac thanks for the flowers it was sweet of you to remember.” He said, “It’s always right to remember a ladies flower preference because that’s the right thing to do.” Smiling the rest of the day I meet other travel channel celebrities and got to taste some great foods and many different wines. The food and wine offerings at the hotels and restaurants are varied, the Las Vegas area have become very international, so the varieties are endless.
The week went by in a blur of food, wine, conversation, and some sweet dates. I never thought I would get over the break-up that happened the week before. Getting a private Vegas tour was something completely special. I did get to see the Mob Museum, Mandalay Bay Fine Art Museum, seven magic mountains, Pinball Hall of fame and a private dinner at the food and wine festival. My days in Vegas were down to one. We had reservations at Rivera right here at the Delano the view is amazing, the food is impressive with Italian and French offers. “I have had a wonderful time this week Zac thank you for mending my broken heart.” He looked at me for a minute and said, “it’s been a pleasure to get to know you and I would not mind visiting your hometown, you always have a reason to come back to Las Vegas. The next food and wine festival is around Christmas, this one will include chocolate.” Hitting the 15 early the next morning I have visions of Christmas, a pass to the food and wine festival, also a brand-new relationship to take back home with me.
The End
When writing a short story, you want to keep it from rambling and have enough details to keep it fresh. When your reader gets into the story you want them to feel like they are there with you, going to the food and wine festival, on that hike through the seven-mountains or touring the mob museum. The details are the thing to see and make sure to watch out for punctuation and common language. An average short story is within 6,00 words or 24 pages. If you wanted too you could go short-short story and that is between 500 and 2,00 words. That comes out to be 6 pages (Minot, Steven Ch. 7 pg. 41), talk about short stories. The story is all your length and style matter as much as how you want it to come into focus.
Minot, Steven and Theil Daniel Three genres the writing of literary pose, poems and plays Ninth edition Pearson Publications 2012
Bouncing Dog Toy Emporium
August 18,2019📷📷
24755 Holly Grove Way
Brookings OR, 97415
Dear Dogs, Rule the World
I am Rachel Schneider from the Bouncing Dog Toy Emporium we make extra bouncy dog toys for our furry friends. We investigated different marketing companies and choose you to do our direct to customer marketing. The way the website is set up the customers can get the product’s directly from you is easier than a multi-level marketing plan. The distribution of Bouncy Dog Toy will be a one level channel, we will provide the toys you market, and we sell them. I would like to get some videos of our company dogs Mac and Stella playing with the toys so you can post on the website. A link for the company can also be included so the consumers know where the toys came from, what they are made of and any other facts about Bouncing Dog Toy Emporium.
Sincerely, Rachel V Schneider
Mac and Stella company dogs and testers 📷
📷 📷📷 📷A sample of our products, our bounciest toys.
Scott’s Story Part 1
I am Scott Thorn, and I am going back to WDU for the first time in 15 years, I went here for a year but after I came out as gay there really were no gay dudes. I am all men but yeah lesbians were all around some BI guys but no real gay dudes. I went back to the mainland and attended Preston University I majored in administration and minored in Literature. I did at one point in my life have a girlfriend and wanted to marry her, but I could not quash the gay lifestyle. That part of my life is over and now the old school offered me a counseling job, have not done this in a while. I get to help students toward there after college career.
I sit here on this boat and keeping an eye on my 75 Triumph I have some nerves, but it is mostly about seeing this place again, so as the boat pulls up, I get my bike going and make a stop at my new on campus apartment. Its west facing because I like sunsets more than sunrise, so I did not know it needed so much work. I have some handy skills but a little at a time. The kitchen is decent and so is the bathroom. The floors will need some polish and the deck needs to be stained, this is a duplex, so I hope the neighbors are quiet. It is furnished and done nicely so I cannot complain too much, but back on the bike to see the Dean.
I get my bike set with the kill switch and walk up the way to the Admin building, I am pretty much the only one dressed. I am wearing my good black jeans and my dress shirt, in my favorite color Maroon. I do remember this place was obsessed with sex so I will stick out wearing clothes, as I enter the building at least more admin people are dressed. Miss Grant the secretary shows me to my new office, its spacious much bigger that my last one at Preston where I shared a cubicle with another person. I have files from past students and current ones, so I started filing them when Dean Kane walks in, booty shorts and a tank top. “Welcome back to WDU Scott, we look forward to seeing you succeed you come very recommended.” I could hardly concentrate because this Dean was hung but I persevered and said, “Thank you sir I look forward to helping young students find there after WDU careers.”
After he left, I had to get my rise to settle then I continued filing and looking through some files. Clarissa Love that was a name that got around even all the way to Preston. I think she does the Jax in the bedroom or something like that. I started looking around and thought I need some life in this office so I asked Miss Grant about decorating and she said I could do what I wanted but no painting, so I went to town and checked out a flea market. I found some pictures of the beaches of Canada, some old homes in the area and a few movie posters from Rocky horror Picture Show (it is my favorite). The flea market said they will deliver to the school tomorrow so I told them I will be there at 9am.
Now with my day done I get to the store to buy some groceries and realize this place uses sextons and I was down to my last few, so now I will need to exchange but thankfully a bank is nearby so I can get some of my mainland money exchanged. I pull up to my new pad off load my few groceries and notice some other tenant left beer in the fridge, talk about luck. I got the beer went to the deck and watched the sunset over the sky. It was going to be new here, but I needed a fresh start after getting dumped and losing the job because my ex was in upper management, never will I do that again. I will find someone who does not work in the school system. After I ate a roast beef and cheddar sandwich for dinner, watched some cooking shows it was time for bed. As I was brushing my teeth, I heard the neighbors having sex. Oh, goody they are not quiet. hope they do not have super energy either. Tomorrow is my first full day and I have decorating to do, fantastic they stopped, that is the thing with us older people we do not fuck like bunnies anymore. As far as I know the neighbors are lesbians so who knows.
Sample 1- If I try my hardest, I could muster up enough courage to ask the prettiest girl in school to prom. I had a suit; bolo tie and I will shine my old boots up. The thing is my courage is not as strong as my best friend Nick, now there is one brave dude who just asked the girl I wanted to go to prom with and of course she said yes. I gather myself close my locker and put on my best smile for them both. Nick and I high five and I hug her, trying to be genuine but it is hard. I head to my Social studies class and sit down next to Megan she looks at me with some concern I tell her what happened, she then asks me to Prom…...
Sample 2-Wishing I did not have to be here I sit at the back of the funeral and think about my old high school principal. I grew up in a small town and everyone knew everyone, we only had one school and you went there for kindergarten through senior year. After my graduation I packed up my old car and headed out to what I thought was the real world. Living in a bigger city only helped spur my loneliness so who says you cannot come home again, well Mom for starters because I abandoned my family, I am not welcome at home ever again (so tired of her drama), so I am staying at Principal Mason’s house yes, the same principal that I am at a funeral for I held her hand as she lay there succumbing to cancer……
Sample 3-If you really want to get over a breakup getting back on the horse will help things along. I thought that too seven lousy dates ago so here I am on date number 8 and I am not seeing any birds singing or rainbows in the sky. He steps away to take a call he is a particularly important lawyer after all (I need to fix my picker) after he comes back, he says it go time the jury has come back so off he goes. I finish my drink and head back to my brownstone close by, I pass the new chocolate shop that just opened, and I get inside and see chocolate heaven. Looking around I do not see him at first but there he is my old college lab partner Sam I just saw a rainbow…….

The campaign for The Killers’ new LP Imploding The Mirage has already endured a delayed album, postponed tour and potential scandal against the dystopian backdrop of Covid-19. Here, the band’s Brandon Flowers and Ronnie Vannucci, manager Robert Reynolds, WME agent Kirk Sommer and EMI’s Clive Cawley reflect on a turbulent few months – and roll out plan B...
For one of Las Vegas’ favourite sons, Brandon Flowers plays his cards close to his chest. The Killers frontman has retained an enigmatic aura in the age of celebrity and social media, so having a fellow indie rock‘n’roller on hand to fill in the blanks feels like hitting the jackpot.
“Brandon is a workhorse,” enthuses Travis singer Fran Healy, Flowers’ one-time touring partner. “He’ll come off stage and go and run for an hour on a treadmill; then he’ll have a shower, go to the back of the tour bus and start songwriting until 3am. He doesn’t stop.”
“I don’t know that he’s any different to me, maybe no treadmills,” chuckles Flowers, confirming the veracity of the account. The rock superstar co-wrote Here With Me – the final single from the US band’s 2012 Battle Born LP – with Healy.
“We love Fran,” beams Flowers, speaking to Music Week from his home in Park City, Utah. “At our very first gig me and Dave Keuning, our guitarist, did an open mic night at a café and played a Travis song, Side, which I love. So getting to know him and becoming friendly has been really nice. It’s always good to be able to talk to someone who’s shared some of these experiences and has done it before you.”
This was meant to be The Killers’ year. A career-defining Glastonbury headline slot (see panel on p18) laid the groundwork for their biggest ever British tour (250,000 tickets sold in under two hours), while outstanding new album Imploding The Mirage looked set to enshrine their place in rock’s Champions League.
Alas, 2020 had other ideas. The group’s UK stadium run was put back 12 months, while the accompanying long-player finally saw the light of day last Friday – three months later than originally planned (thanks to you know what).
“It brought a lot of activity to a halt unfortunately,” sighs their agent, WME partner and head of music Kirk Sommer. “We had a complete 18-month plan with some additional stadium shows in other territories.”
Forecasting the chaos that was to come, Sommer moved quickly to secure alternative dates for 2021.
​

"I've noticed songs are coming easier as I get older."
- Brandon Flowers

“I had some early visibility as I saw what was happening in Asia and some other territories, and by the end of February or first week of March – while shows were still playing out in the UK – we were able to successfully hold the same markets,” he says. “I do not have a crystal ball and there is no science or data to support this will be a viable time period, but it’s as late as we could go in these venues and there are other tours getting confirmed and going on sale for the spring in the UK and in far worse impacted territories. So we remain very cautious, but have to remain hopeful as well. Demand remains very strong.”
Nevada-born Flowers, who turns 40 next year, upped sticks from Vegas a couple of years ago and has been relishing life in lockdown with wife Tana and their three sons. “I feel a little bit guilty,” he confides. “I’m so used to travelling so much and being away that I’m enjoying the extra time being in such close proximity to everybody. It’s been a nice experience.”
“I’m spending a lot more time in the kitchen,” chips in drummer Ronnie Vannucci, halfway through making a sandwich. “I don’t mind it so bad, except that I was really looking forward to sharing these songs and playing them for people and now it’s... a little different.”
On the album delay, The Killers manager Robert Reynolds says the decision was effectively taken out of their hands.
“It was hard, but there were two factors,” explains the Reynolds Management boss. “First, the album wasn’t completed. Part way through mixing we couldn’t get into the room with our mixer, who had a new baby. Things were done remotely and certain finishing touches had to be completed.
“Still, everyone hoped that Covid-19 would be resolved quickly. At first, the label hoped we could delay a few months and perhaps things could be different. When it became clear that performing live wouldn’t happen for a while, we just did our best to get this music finished and out to our fans as soon as possible.”
“People need music now more than ever,” asserts Flowers. “Music has always been a place that I go to for comfort or escape, or to feel like I’m not alone, and I think those attributes of music are still alive and kicking and people need them now.”
Even with the intervention of a global pandemic, EMI MD Clive Cawley says the campaign’s core objective remains the same – to deliver a sixth straight UK No.1 studio album for The Killers.
“It’s been a stop-start process since we launched a ticket pre-order bundle as far back as November 2019,” reflects Cawley. “With the album originally slated for a May release, it’s been somewhat of a challenge to maintain public and media interest and enthusiasm. Full credit to both the band for delivering an excellent record and our team working the project for never giving up and making sure we do it justice across every department. It’s just kept rolling along very nicely indeed.”
Lead single Caution (49,560 sales, OCC), which features former Fleetwood Mac star Lindsey Buckingham on guitar, got the latest Killers era off to a flying start, reaching No.1 on the US rock airplay chart. Three other tracks: Fire In Bone, My Own Soul’s Warning and the soaring Dying Breed were also put out ahead of time. “We released as many tracks before the album dropped as we could,” says Reynolds. “It’s hard to sit on songs you know are great.”
​

"The Killers have never wanted to headline rooms too big, too fast."
- Robert Reynolds, Reynolds Management

Recorded in studios in Utah, Las Vegas and Los Angeles, Shawn Everett and Foxygen’s Jonathan Rado were drafted in to handle production duties, with other cameos including KD Lang, Weyes Blood and The War On Drugs’ Adam Granduciel on what is trumpeted as the band’s “most collaborative” record to date.
“I feel good about it,” nods Vannucci, who names Blowback and Running Towards A Place as personal highlights. “We went off track a little bit with the way we do things and arrived at a very pleasing spot,” he continues. “It was like going camping without knowing where you’re going, and then arriving at a really good camp spot.”
Every track is brimming with mass singalong potential, befitting the enormous stages on which they were intended to be played.
“We’ve always written a certain type of song that resonates with a lot of people,” notes Flowers. “We’ve never been shy about our admiration for the Rolling Stones, U2 and these bands that do that well and so I think it’s just part of our DNA. It’s definitely there and it’s something that you think about.”
Reynolds admits to keeping his initially sky-high expectations in check due to world events. “Now that we won’t have touring to support the new songs, I’m not sure what to expect,” he concedes. “Bands that aren’t using the biggest pop writers to dominate Top 40 radio rely on live performances to expose fans to their music. All of The Killers’ hits – and even non-hits that became fan favourites, like All These Things That I’ve Done – became such as a result of live performances. I can’t wait for us to get back on the road to do this album justice.”
Guitarist Keuning and bassist Mark Stoermer stepped back from touring prior to the 2017/18 Wonderful Wonderful tour (“I wanted to have more of a normal life,” Keuning told MW last year). Though Stoermer contributed to Imploding The Mirage, the record is the group’s first to be made without Keuning’s involvement. However, Reynolds insists both founding members remain part of the band. “Extensive touring takes its toll,” he says. “Everyone is getting along fine and I expect that both of them will be more involved on the next album cycle.”
Seasoned festival headliners, The Killers are already a proven draw at the highest level, but their 10-date jaunt now set for 2021 – scheduled to kick off in Doncaster on May 25 and conclude at Manchester’s Emirates Old Trafford on June 12, prior to two outdoor shows in Ireland – will be their first UK stadium tour.
“The Killers have never wanted to headline rooms too big, too fast,” says Reynolds. “Other bands in similar positions would have played full stadium tours at an earlier point in their career. We were certain we would sell the shows out, and the band have been touring in the UK with consistent No.1 records for six albums now. The time felt right.”
“We also wanted to launch with something really big that would reverberate around the world,” adds Sommer. “We had already sold out Wembley Stadium on a previous campaign and sold out Hyde Park in record time to signify the beginning of the last campaign, which was immediately followed by a sold-out arena run.
“We put our toe in the water [in 2018] with a couple of outdoor regional shows in Swansea and Bolton that accompanied a larger European festival run to see how the band and the fans would like them. It was an easy way to try a couple before we overcommitted to something more extensive that we might not love. The thought was that, if they were a success, we would and could plot the whole next UK and Irish album run outdoors.”
The year took another unwelcome turn in the last week of July, when The Killers camp was rocked by lurid sexual misconduct accusations dating back more than a decade. In a blog, Chez Cherrie, an audio technician who worked on the band’s Day & Age tour for three weeks in 2009, described a misogynistic backstage culture and, most seriously, alleged hearing crew members boast of sexually assaulting an intoxicated woman in a dressing room at a Milwaukee venue.
​

"They are cementing themselves even deeper in the history books."
- Clive Cawley, EMI

​
A subsequent internal investigation deduced the claims were “an attempt at a joke or a ‘hazing’” by a front of house (FOH) engineer after interviewing crew and tracing the alleged victim, who confirmed “she did not experience, witness or hear about a sexual assault”. The group’s lawyers identified the FOH engineer, dismissed from the touring team in 2013, as a “problematic workmate” whose “pattern of poor management” and “series of sexist remarks and rude comments” had caused “great distress” to the complainant.
Reynolds tells Music Week that although the band were “shocked” by the allegations, they were determined to find out exactly what had happened. “It was important to us that we were thorough in our investigation – including reports from the venue, security, and depositions of crew members conducted by a separate law firm – transparent in our findings and also that we carefully considered what changes can be made going forward,” he explains.
“I’ve seen first-hand what bad men can do to a woman’s experience in this life,” says Flowers. “So if there was something like that going on in our camp, of course, I wanted to get to the bottom of it and thank God, it was proven to be a false alarm. I want our fans to know that we would never turn a blind eye to an assault. We respect women and we want everybody to know that.”
For a band whose two decades in the business have been devoid of scandal, the episode was a reality check.
“It changed our way of thinking about everything,” remarks Vannucci. “We are constantly trying to promote good living and responsibility; that is how we run the ship and we’re going to continue to do so – perhaps with a little bit more of a vision and an outlook for keeping people safe and making them feel safe when working under our umbrella.”
The Killers have directed their team to establish an off-site independent HR contact for future tours.
“If there is something positive to come out of this, we’re going to have a HR development on our next tour where if anybody feels scared or like they are being treated unfairly, or feel uncomfortable in any way, they’ll have a number to call,” says Flowers. “Hopefully that will make women especially feel more comfortable on a job that is predominantly men.”
“Touring and the music industry as a whole was really different 10 to 15 years ago and we hope we can be part of the change to make it more welcoming to everyone,” reflects Reynolds. “We all need to be vigilant that no one is ever made uncomfortable. Unlike other large companies, touring bands don’t have HR departments. For that reason, we decided to retain a third party HR company going forward. I’d suggest every band do this so that all crew members feel like they have a reliable third party to voice and investigate concerns.”
Imploding The Mirage’s predecessor, 2017’s Wonderful Wonderful (182,398 sales), gave the rockers a first No.1 LP in their homeland, although much of the attention was focused on ubiquitous first single The Man (345,592 sales) and its memorable music video. “I always associate the record with the tour and I loved the tour,” says Flowers. “I’m really proud of songs like Rut, The Man and Run For Cover, I feel like they are going to stick around.”
For Vannucci and Reynolds, the period conjures up mixed emotions. “That was an odd time for me personally,” recalls Vannucci. “My father died and I was fresh off the heels of a divorce when we were writing that record. I wouldn’t say it was dark, but there was definitely change in the air. But I really enjoyed the tour.”
“The Man was very successful — a great video and the first [US] alternative No.1 in 10 years since Read My Mind,” notes Reynolds. “Still, there are songs on that album which I don’t think enough people are familiar with. The campaign went well, but I wish music consumption today wasn’t so singles-oriented and people spent more time appreciating entire albums.”
Flowers, for one, hasn’t lost sight of the power of deeper cuts. “We still strive to create an overall listening experience or a feeling with an entire record,” he reveals. “You can’t really do that without having those types of songs and sometimes those are people’s favourites. When I was growing up, I didn’t necessarily know what the singles were when I bought an album. I gravitated towards what my heart gravitated towards.”
Lest we forget, The Killers sold records when bands really sold records – 2004 debut Hot Fuss has moved 2,333,888 copies in the UK, while sales of follow-ups Sam’s Town (2006) and Day & Age (2008) have also reached seven figures. The group has amassed over 15 million monthly Spotify listeners – outranking the likes of Arctic Monkeys, Foo Fighters, Kings Of Leon, The 1975, Muse and Radiohead – and continue to straddle the line between the old and new (albeit, just 16% of Wonderful Wonderful’s sales were from streaming). But it’s not a subject Flowers is losing any sleep over.
“It’s kind of out of our hands,” he shrugs. “It’s interesting to watch it happen – Napster was just making headlines when we were starting, so it was in its infancy and it seems like there is no going back. Sometimes I’ll get a statistic and hear how many people are streaming you per month and it’s amazing. But my heart goes out to a young band that have to prove their statistics before they get a certain amount of attention from their record label. I’m a lucky one because our foot was already in the door.”
Vannucci is hopeful rock music can re-establish itself as a mainstream force. “Everything is cyclical,” he says. “I really hope there is a resurgence.”
The band’s 2013 compilation Direct Hits (752,492 sales) remains ingrained in the albums chart, due in no small part to their cross-generational anthem Mr Brightside (3,212,710 sales!), incredibly still a fixture of the Top 100 almost 17 years after it was first released.
“The strength and depth of their hits over more than a decade clearly keeps winning over new audiences week in and week out,” observes EMI’s Cawley. “Stick it on, I’d be amazed if you skip any of those tracks and also if you manage to resist the urge to crack open an ice cold cider or foamy lager of choice to enjoy it with.”
With the globe in such a state of flux, questions about the future can seem misguided, but Flowers’ ambition is undimmed.
“We were just about to go on our biggest tour that we’ve ever gone on. I was really looking forward to that and I’m still looking forward to that,” he says. “But I just want to evolve and keep getting better. I have started to notice that songs are coming easier as I get older and as I write more and exercise these muscles that I’ve developed over the years. So I’m really looking forward to the next decade and it’s something that I’m definitely on top of.”
“I just trust that we’ll make better and better records,” offers Vannucci. “That is our objective right now – trying to do good with what we’re given.”
Sommer’s thoughts are naturally fixed on the live arena. “We have multiple global options held but refrained from putting anything further on sale to preserve the cash flow of our fans and ultimately be mindful of everyone’s health and safety,” he says. “Once we have more visibility and a better handle on timing we will be ready to go. The guys thrive in the live setting and I know they can’t wait to get back out there and perform some of these great new songs.”
“Every tour cycle has been more successful than the last,” finishes Reynolds, who already has one eye on LP number seven. “Nobody is ready to rest on any laurels,” he insists. “I can’t drop any names, but let me just say that one of the top three Killers songs ever written is on the next album. It’s the best of early Killers while staying fresh and reflecting their development as a band. I can’t wait for the world to hear it.”
EMI is bidding to keep both the band and Imploding The Mirage at the forefront of people’s minds through the end of the year, with a view to a second promotional push around the rescheduled stadium dates.
“There’s plenty of quality in there,” sums up Cawley. “It all feels very much like they are cementing themselves even deeper in the history books of greatness.”
Maybe 2020 will still be their year after all...
​

The Brightside of life: The Killers reflect on Glastonbury 2019

How The Killers defied the odds to conquer Glastonbury 2019...
It was one of the greatest nights of their careers, but The Killers’ second time around headlining Glastonbury was not always a surefire home run.
The band came into last year’s festival cold and off-cycle, with no new music to promote, having wrapped up their Wonderful Wonderful tour the previous autumn. But the chance to right the wrongs of their Pyramid Stage headline debut 12 years earlier was too good to turn down.
“I don’t recall exactly when it became a real possibility, but I had been gently petting at the potential opportunity for many months knowing the [50th] anniversary year would be forthcoming and we already had our own pure outdoor headline plan for 2020,” reveals WME’s Kirk Sommer. “I knew if given the opportunity it was something we could not refuse, it was one of the biggest and most credible televised music events in the world to spring-load the next album tour campaign with. There was a little healthy discourse around it given the unique timing but they ultimately said, ‘Let’s do it’.”
Brandon Flowers admits he took some persuading to get on board. “My first thought when we were asked was to say no,” he admits. “We were in the middle of downtime and it was a little nerve wracking to be thrown into it like that. But our people rallied behind the idea and them having that faith helped us and it ended up being a great experience.”
“We’re always doubting ourselves,” says Ronnie Vannucci. “We always want to be delivering something new and fresh and we were worried that, having been [in the UK] such a short time before Glastonbury, we were a little at risk of overstaying our welcome.”
The night was an unequivocal triumph, propelling Direct Hits 66-5 in the charts in the wake of the performance, with an immense 323.4% week-on-week sales increase. Ironically, after their 2007 bow was marred by sound issues, the 2019 gig was reportedly the loudest in the event’s history.
Both band members consider the show, which saw them joined by childhood idols Pet Shop Boys and Johnny Marr for the climactic encore, an all-time live highlight.
“I really believe it’s No.1,” grins Flowers. “Not to downplay any other experience along the way, but it’s such an iconic gig. I equate it with something like the Wimbledon final or the Super Bowl and I was so happy with the outcome. The crowd were great and we were a well-oiled machine. We were able to celebrate our career and pay a nod to a couple of our heroes and inspirations. Talk about the stars aligning, they did for us that night.”
An excerpt from Fran Healy's interview in the same issue:
I came to co-write The Killers single Here With Me with Brandon Flowers because…
“We hit it off many, many years ago. He’s amazing. He came to a show that we played with Oasis in Las Vegas and it was a very memorable show for him. All his band members were there, independently of him, before they were in The Killers. I did a solo record in 2010 and I asked Brandon if I could support him on his solo tour, just over in America, so I travelled about and slept in a bunk on his tour bus for a few days. One night, I came in at the back of the bus and went, ‘Oh shit, I’m sorry, man’. He was like, ‘No, come in. I’m writing this song’. He played the melody and I was like, ‘Can I make a suggestion?’ And then we wrote it together. I basically barged into his songwriting session and elbowed my way in.”
Music Week

Continuing
“Yes,” he replies, “Two will drive in in their own vehicles, but one will be flying, I think, it’s not yet been confirmed. If he does arrive on time, he’ll have to go in the field with you in your truck.”
“OK, now I’m a taxi service?” I snicker, “Price of poker’s going up.”
“Yes, right,” he grimaces, “As per your prospectus, you’re running the show out in the field. You have to being you’re the only one fully licensed. “
“This is news?” I asked.
“Well, “he continues, “All of your associates will possess some degree of blasting experience.”
“But none are licensed?” I ask.
“Not as such,” he replies. “Either way, you’re running the show out there. Make certain they all survive and return moderately intact.”
“Always my intention,” I say, “Can I see the list?”
“Certainly,” Harry says, sitting back and lighting up my cigar.
OK, let’s see…”
No doctors, yet. All last-year PhD candidates in either mining or engineering geology. Well, not my absolute first choices, but I guess it’s better than a sharp stick on the eye.
There’s:
• Albert W. Armstrong. “Al”. University of Missouri, Rolla. Mining geology.
• Charles F. Glaciisto. “Chuck”. New Mexico Tech., Socorro. Mining geology.
•Leonard. R. Paskapää. “Leonard”. Colorado School of Mines. Engineering geology.
“Well, there’s a nice assortment,” I say, “Guess I’ll see them when they get there.”
“Chuck and Al are driving out. Leonard is flying out, I think, and won’t be there for another two weeks.” Harry tells me.
“Fine by me. Hope they boned up and brought all the necessary gear. This is a real job, not a field trip.” I said.
“I agree Rock,” Harry intones, “They have the project prospectus, so there should be few surprises. Well, I’m off to some meetings in DC. I’ll have to catch you for dinner when you return. In the meantime, we have a reservation for you at the Hyatt next door. I’ve also arranged for your trailer and supplies tomorrow at 0600. I knew you’d want to be out on the road early.”
“Fair dinkum, Harry,” I say, “Sounds like a plan. I’ll be in touch. Have a good trip.”
“You too,” he says as we shake hands and depart.
The Hyatt was comfortable, but just another in a long line of chain hotels. Adequate clean room, decent food, ridiculous mini-bar prices. I was up at 0500, showered, and ready to head over to the armory for my Nevada supplies.
I show up at 0545. I was that ready to get back on the road. Surprisingly, all I had time for was an early morning Bear Claw and coffee before everyone showed up.
“Right this way, Rock,” Andy the Armorer told me. “Drive right back to bay 5. I’ll open it up and we’ll have you on your way.”
So, I wheeled back to Bay 5, spun the truck around, and backed right up to the door.
I tootled my horn and the corrugated door began to roll up.
Andy motioned for me to back in, slowly. Using hand signs, I backed in enough for them to close the door again.
I saw my old trailer over in the corner and was thinking it was nice to have a familiar bit of kit.
Then another trailer was rolled out. Fully twice the size of the old trailer, it was painted a ghastly government green, overlain with black and yellow cross stripes. It was plastered with DOD, DOT, DOI, and all the other necessary stickers. There was one large and very prominent sticker on the bumper that proclaimed; “EXPLOSIVES! DANGER! STAY BACK 500 FEET.”
“Oh, that’s nice and unobtrusive,” I said. “No one will give that a second thought.”
Fucking sheesh-buckets.
Half the trailer was taken up by a cast-iron tub, with hinged lid. It had an electric motor to raise and lower the lid, just the thing for going out in the boonies, I thought. It was made of very stout and thick welded steel and was quite lockable. It also looked bullet, lightning, and nuke-proof.
It also weighed a fucking ton.
The rest of the trailer had several lockable compartments, of varying sizes for the inclusions of all my different blasting equipment, all made of the same stern stuff.
The whole trailer had a resolute fiberglass lid, although the munitions tub still stuck out proclaiming its message of impending doom for all tailgaters to see.
“Is this all really necessary?” I asked Andy.
“Latest DOD, DOT, and DOI specs,” he told me.
“Marvelous,” I muttered.
“Well, let’s get on with the show,” I said. “You have my goodies list? I want to get out on the road.”
“Yes, sir!” he saluted, as he was still military. He barked some orders and suddenly, cart after cart after cart of the fun stuff arrived.
He delighted in showing me that this was a custom trailer. A special compartment in the tub was for binaries, a special section for dynamite, and one for all the other permissibles. The rest of the trailer was marked with cute little lockable cubbies for “Blasting caps,” “Galvanometer,” “Primacord,” “Demolitoin [sic] Wire,” etc.
It was all a very governmental job. Over-designed, over-engineered, and over-wrought.
I came to love it.
The lockbox in my truck was now empty, so I had the opportunity to load up with a few extras. I thought “You can’t go wrong with Primacord,” so 3 extra spools went in there. As did another couple boxes of initiators, pop-drop-forget fuses, a box of Fusees (road flares), delay caps, a couple of pairs of blaster’s pliers, as I kept losing mine, spools of demo wire, and extra batteries and an extra electronic detonator.
Best to be prepared, as I always say.
I was now weighed down with over to a ton of explosives, along with all the ancillary tackle.
Luckily my truck had that big, ol’ turbocharged V-8. We’re going into the mountains dragging the equivalent of a rental company Toy-Auto behind us.
I signed all the paperwork and waited until everyone present had their own notarized copy to lose. I was given two sets of keys, just in case. After I disbursed some thank you cigars, I eased out of the armory, dragging this trailer down that endless black ribbon of highway.
It was chained, wired, and padlocked to my truck. It would be a serious pain in the ass to take it off and park it for the night. Until I hit Reno, I either camp rough or stick to the plastic water glass circuit, that is, truck stops.
“No problem,” I thought. “I’ve done worse.”
Back on the road again, I’m cutting due west towards Arizona. Even with my truck’s big turbo V-8, with all the shit I was carrying and dragging behind, forget rapid acceleration or passing on anything even approximating a stiff grade.
I eased on down the road, out of New Mexico and into Arizona. I resolve to visit Cuba on the return trip.
A simple swing across Arizona and I’m in Nevada. Looks like smooth sailing ahead…
Things are going along swimmingly. I’m making great time on I-40 across Arizona.
Sure, it’s hot out, but there’s not much traffic and I can keep a pretty steady pace. So much so, I’m pointing the truck in a generally westward direction and I busy my long hours away futzing with the CB radio, eavesdropping on truckers on channel 19. Or, I futz with my shortwave trying to find Radio Moscow.
Yeah, even the CWG, car window geology, can pale after miles and miles of miles…
I’m tempted to swing through Winslow, Arizona just because I’m a fan of the Eagles. But the road is humming so nicely, I just decide to ‘Take it Easy’, and continue onwards.
Through Flagstaff, through Ash Fork, through Seligman. I’m blazing along only to have to take a bit a break outside of Kingman to avail myself of the roadside rest area facilities before I make the lane change and head for Vegas.
Or, more accurately, around Vegas. I want no part of dragging over a ton of high explosives down The Strip. Besides, the DOT would hang me by my thumbs, or more tender appendages, if I didn’t take an ‘ODOT’, or ‘Optional Direction Of Travel’.
Got to stay away from agglomerations of those people things.
That won’t be for a while as I head up Highway 93. Through Chloride and Willow Beach, up toward Henderson. I zip over the Colorado River and I’m in my destination state. In the far, far south of the state, and I’m headed to the extreme northwest of the state, but, hey, I’m in the damned state nonetheless.
Up towards Las Vegas, I really want to pull in, grab a suite, and go all Vegas-y. But, duty calls. I resolve to take Esme to Vegas when I get back to Houston and before we make any plans to head to some Middle Eastern sandpit.
I schuss up the 11 right towards Vegas and right on past via 215. I’m now on 160 headed towards one of my favorite cities: Pahrump, Nevada.
Governor Lepetomane: [pointing to a member of his cabinet] “I didn't get a "Pahrump" out of that guy!”
Hedley Lamarr: “Give the Governor a ‘Pahrump’!”
Politician: “Pahrump!!”
Governor Lepetomane: “You watch your ass.”
Pahrump, indeed.
Anyways, I continue along in Nevada as the sun slowly slinks down ahead of me. All the hours on the road, all this fresh air, all the cigars…
Shit, I need a drink and a nap.
I’m between Beatty and Bonne Claire, just outside the Mojave Desert when I suddenly felt the urge to pull over, climb in the back of my truck, have a stout drink, and flake out until it cools off some.
There’s really not much out in this part of the world, so I pull off the highway and go off-road some 150 meters or so; parking parallel, but somewhat distant to, the highway. That way, people would think I’m a local, or a camper, but not anyone in trouble. So they’d just flash by and leave me the fuck alone for a while. Plus, I didn’t need to look for a motel, pay for a motel, schlep baggage…oh, fuck, I need a road snooze…
I lock the cab of the truck, pop open the step cap, and climb inside. I couldn’t be arsed to find a proper glass for a cocktail, so I just liberated a frosty beer from the closest cooler.
I rearranged my tack in the back of the truck to make a most serviceable little nest, and pulled down, but didn’t lock, the back window. Just right for a few hours’ kip. I set my .454 next to me, got comfy on my sleeping bag, and was out before I could even start that initial beer.
I awoke suddenly, hearing rather than seeing something prowling around in the impenetrable darkness outside. Of indigenous animals, I possess no fear. But I’ve seen ‘The Hill Have Eyes,” “Texas Chainsaw Massacre” and actually hail from the land that spawned Ed Gein, so I’m a bit, well, ‘alert’.
I spy the glint of something possibly metallic, so it’s official. There’s an ax-wielding serial killer wandering around outside lusting for my giblets. He probably has a hook for a hand and only appears on the roadside on the anniversary of his family’s decapitations in a bloody sweater knitted by his dead wife.
Either that or it’s a silver possum.
Whatever it was, it went up to the front of my truck and seemed to be testing the doors.
I still have on my field boots, loosened, so I tie them as securely as I can manage. I slowly ease open the rear window of the step cap and, silently as a moose, slip out of the truck.
I have my .454 loaded and in defense position. Any small, slow, and stupid beast that turned its back on me was looking for a stomping.
The world went dazzling white as someone, or something shone a very powerful flashlight in my face. Imagine going from the inside of a cavern to the bright side of the sun in the space of 11 milliseconds. Luckily, my firearms training prevented any potential disaster.
Although, it did hurt like hell having one’s iris’ snap shut like that.
“Whoa!” I heard a voice, “Who the fuck are you?”
“Whoa!” I said, “Who the fuck are you?”
“STAND DOWN! NOW!” I heard.
“OK,” I thought, “It’s a cop…”
“Cool out! I’m licensed for CCL. See? Gun going down!” I said, loudly.
“OK, gun on the ground and stand back!” He ordered.
“Absolutely, sir,” I said, “I hear and comply.”
“What the hell is that?” I heard someone ask.
“Umm, Officer?” I asked, “I’m Doctor Rocknocker of Texas. I’m going to Reno to the BLM and DOI. I am licensed for CCL and that, lying there getting dusty, is a custom .454 Casull Magnum.”
“Come forward so I can see your hands and be recognized.” He orders.
“Yes, sir,” I said and complied.
“OK, slowly. Your identification.” He barked as I slowly handed him my wallet.
“OK. Doctor Rocknocker. Right. Texas CCL. OK. Texas Driver’s License. Right. Blaster’s license. OK. Master Blaster’s certificate. Umm. ISEE membership. Yeah. What’s this?” he asks, shining his light on my wallet.
“My Russian Driver’s License,” I reply.
“Um, yeah. OK…” he says and hands back my wallet.
“May I retrieve my sidearm?” I ask.
“Certainly,” he replies.
I grab my Casull and dust it off as best I can before shoving it out of sight, back into its holster.
“What the hell are you doing out here in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night? He asks.
“Well, I’m a geologist…” I begin.
He holds up a hand and stops me right there.
“That explains it.” he snickers. “You fuckers are nuts.”
“Well, I cannot in good faith argue that point,” I concur.
Officer Westmoreland, as I soon found out, is a Nevada State Trooper. He saw my rig parked, dark, on the side of the road out here on the fringes of the Mojave. He was checking if anyone was around or might be in of need assistance.
I told him my long, sordid tale. I wandered over to my truck and pulled out a cigar. Officer Westmoreland refused my initial offer.
He didn’t resist when I pulled over my larger cooler, grabbed a glass, and poured myself several hands of bourbon over ice.
“Officer, I know you’re on duty, but could I interest you in a cold drink?” I asked. “I have several soft and hard drinks, whatever is your pleasure.”
“Well, Doctor,” he smiled, “I was on my way home and I was actually off duty when I saw your rig and stopped. Got a cold beer?”
“Certainly. Remember, I’m a geologist? Right. Lager? IPA? Stout? Porter? Can? Bottle? Domestic? Import?” I asked.
“Yep. You’re a geologist. Whatever’s handy,” he laughs.
I hand him a cold Spotted Coo from a small brewery way back in the Foam Town state.
I sit down on the tailgate and fire up a Coleman lantern to dispel the gloom. For the first time, I see Officer Westmoreland and he sees me.
“Please, have a seat.” I said, “I’m just trying to get my heart rate back down to normal.”
He does, at the far end of the tailgate. We’re still sniffing each other out.
He looks closely for the first time at my trailer.
“What’s all that about?” he asks.
“Oh, that?” I ask and take a deep draught of Kentucky’s Finest. “That’s just the transport system for over a ton of high explosives.”
He looks at me like I’m joking.
“Ah, it’s empty, right?” he asks.
“Nope. Totally loaded. Want to see the manifests?” I ask.
“You’re not fucking with me, are you, Doctor? Is that really is a ton of high explosives sitting there not 5 feet away…it’s not empty?” he shudders.
“Nope. It is quite full. See, I’m going to the DOI, pick up some trainees, and some toilet paper in Reno. Then we’ll all head out into the wild and blow the living shit out of some old, abandoned mines.” I reply.
“OH!” he says, relieved, “Wait! I’ve heard of that program. Hey! You’re that crazy guy from Texas, right?”
“I guess,” I replied offhandedly, “If that Texas guy is a geologist and fully licensed blaster.”
“Yeah! You’re him” he laughs, “Good to meet you, sir. It’s about time someone’s doing something about all these old fucking mines. I have to pull corpses out of them two or three times a year. Seal ‘em up, cement ‘em tight, leave bat bars, don’t matter none. Assholes rip it right down and tear it up, go in, fall down a fucking shaft and die. I have better things to do with my time than retrieve bodies, Doctor. I am glad you’re here.”
“I am glad to be here.” I reply, “We’re on a kind of pilot program. Another doctor, Dr. Eva and I, kind of pioneered the process of sealing mines completely or sealing them leaving bat access in the Four Corners area. One thing leads to another and here we are. Sharing a drink, and a smoke, not 1.5 meters away from a ton of high explosives.”
“Well,” Office Westmoreland says, “If you’re cool with it, so am I.” as he lights another Marlboro.
He decides on another quick beer, as he’s never has a Spotted Coo before. We sit and have a really nice chat. He was keen on looking at my .454. I showed him my 10 gauge Mossberg and he was impressed with that. Then I opened my vest to show him the twin 10mm Glocks I was toting.
“Preparing for action?” he asks.
“But failing to prepare, you prepare to fail,” I noted.
“I hear that!” he says and drains his beer.
He hands me the empty as I always carry garbage bags for just such an emergency.
“Pack out your trash” isn’t just a good idea, it’s the law.”
“Well, Doctor,” he says, “Time for me to go on home. Take it easy out here and get a few hours rest before you head out, you’ve had some of the wet stuff.”
“I plan to, Officer Westmoreland,” I assure him, “Thanks, and have a good rest of the night.”
“And watch out for serial killers” He chuckles, as he gets back into his squad car and heads off down the road.
“He was a nice chap. Very affable. Weird sense of humor, though.” I muse.
The next morning, I whip up a quick breakfast of roadside yaws and goiters. I clean up, pack everything back, and am back on the road.
I’ll be on 95 most of the way to Reno. Past Tonopah, Coaldale, and Hawthorne. Heading more or less due north.
The sun is already baking and I strip off my vest and put my Glocks in the lockbox. I am still wearing my Casull because reasons.
I motor past Schurz, and up to Silver Springs. I spend an hour there refueling and availing myself of the facilities.
I made sure to keep everyone happy and park out on the fringes of the truck stop after I gas up.
Now it’s 439 to Clark, Nevada, onto I-80. Headed more westy than northy now, aimed directly for Reno.
I check my DOI prepared itinerary and see I need to find Financial Boulevard in Reno. Very easy as the town’s laid out in a nice, neat grid-like sort of pattern, kind of.
I circle around the area looking for an entrance and spy the Genghis Khan Mongolian restaurant about a quarter-mile from the DOI office. I know where I’m having lunch.
I pull into the Bureau’s parking lot and head for the rear. I show my credentials at the gate as I don’t think I should leave this trailer out front.
I park and wander back into the DOI, weapons all secured in my truck.
Inside, I tell the secretary who I am and that I ‘m here on the Abandoned Mines initiative.
She says “Of course,” and picks up the phone.
Minutes later I am introduced to one Dr. Sam Muleshoe, the director of the DOI around these parts. He walks me back to his office.
“Well, Doctor,” he says, “Welcome to Reno. I trust you had a good trip.”
“Mostly uneventful,” I replied.
“Very good,” he says. “Your associates have not arrived as of yet. Should be here later tonight or early tomorrow. At least two of them will as Leonard won’t be here until the latter part of your project.”
“Fair enough,” I said. “Do we know of their vehicles”? I asked.
“What do you mean?” he says.
“Well, if there are three of us, I can only transport two. I hope one of the vehicles they’re bringing is a four-wheel drive.” I explain.
“I’m not certain.” he relates, “But I can check.”
“No worries,” I reply, “There’s nothing at this point we can do. Best to just wait and see.”
“Right,” he agrees. “Your truck. Is it parked out back?”
“Yes,” I reply.
“Good’, he says, “Let’s go.”
We go out to the back lot and just as I said, my truck and the trailer are sitting there.
“OK, Doctor,” he explains, “While we wait, we’ll get your communications sorted out. We have DOI HF (High Frequency) radios for all outgoing vehicles. We’re on a state-wide government frequency. Plus, we can add a bit of extra kit to your trailer if you like.”
“Such as?” I ask.
“We can add a motorcycle carrier.” he says, “That way, you can take a small dirt bike with you out in the field. If you desire.”
“Oh, fuckin’-A Bubba, hell yeah. I desire”. I think.
“Yes. Yes.,” I agree, “That might just come in handy.” I agree.
A member of the Bureau’s motor pool comes over and asks for my keys. He’ll handle all the modifications.
I hand over my keys, and we walk back to Sam’s office. We spend a few hours getting acquainted. Technical talk, very prosaic.
Since my associates don’t appear to be arriving that day, Dr. Muleshoe suggests I take a room at the Motel 666 just down the road. My truck will be safe and secure until tomorrow.
I agree and go back to my vehicle to gather a few odds and ends. The front seat looks like a Radio Shack exploded. The mechanics and electricians are having the very Devil’s Grandmother of a time hooking up the DOI radio. Seems I have already taken every fusible link available for my stereo, speakers, and other communications devices.
I stash the Mossberg in the back of the truck, under lock and key. I replace my Glocks under my vest and have my Casull on my hip. I grab my field case full of reprints and such, and a change of duds.
Back in the DOI offices, Dr. Muleshoe remarks that with my sidearms and Stetson, I look like a co-star in some Clint Eastwood flick.
This really blew my mind, the fact that me, an overfed, long-haired leaping gnome should be the star of a Hollywood movie.
But I didn’t Burdon myself with that thought for long. Didn’t want to start a War, now, did I?
A Bureau worker drives me over to the hotel. He drops me off with a directory of Reno BLM and DOI, with phone numbers. He also tells me that although this looks like an unassuming motel, they have delivery service from most of the better restaurants in town and that their Happy Hour should be starting soon.
I thank him and he tells me he’ll pick me up tomorrow at 0900 sharp.
I obtain a room easily as evidently nothing fazes these people out here. I wanted to take some time and fart around downtown Reno. But, I decided to let that go until the job is done.
Besides, I don’t feel like walking all over a new town the first night I’m in.
It was a very nice room, clean, utilitarian and with an in-room safe. I stash my sidearms and lock it up solid. I then get to the phone and make some calls.
I call Esme and let her know of my progress. Everything’s puttering along fine back home. Es is thrilled at the new blades I got for her rock saw and she tells me that the omphacite vase is almost ready. She also tells me that I need to bring back representative examples of Nevada’s oddball geology for her to work on. I assure her I will, profess my undying love, and hang up.
I call Rack and Run with an update. All very routine, the call lasts less than five minutes.
Then I call Harry in Albuquerque. Then I remember he’s in DC at a conference of some kind. I leave a quick message on his machine and hang up.
“Well, now,” I say to no one in particular, as I comb back my long silver hair. “Everything business-related is done and dusted. And I’m dusty.”
Down the hall, down the elevator, and off to Happy Hour.
Two for one drinks and they’ll even serve interlopers dressed in ghastly Hawaiian shirts and cargo shorts. I explain the proper construction methods of my signature cocktail and shortly, two large tumblers full of Rocknocker-cocktail appear as I’m perched upon Mahogany Ridge.
All for the princely sum of US$2.00.
I realize that I really like Reno.
It’s sort of a mini-Vegas, I find. I’ve never really been to Reno before and it really is “The Biggest Little City in the World”. Even in this little unassuming bar in this little unassuming motel, there are a couple of tables for roulette, craps, and blackjack.
And walls full of One-Armed Bandits.
Figuring I already paid my Stupid Tax by purchasing some scratch-off lottery tickets for Esme, and dropping $5 on the “Pick Five,” I could forego paying any more into the state’s coffers.
After several more cocktails, I was already 8 bucks in the hole for drinks and $40 bucks more feeding those infernally blinking, though ineffably inviting machines.
I tried the Blazing 7’s machine.
I lost.
I tried the Monopoly slots.
I lost.
I tried the Cash Express.
I came >< this close but still lost.
Disgustapated, I tried one final machine, The Jackpot.
I won $50 bucks.
“Holy shit!” I wowed, “Wow! I broke even!”
I quit immediately and went back to the bar.
I had another couple of drinks and after tipping out the bartender, I realized I had still lost.
I was down $12 dollars.
In other words, I did as well as usual.
Back in my room, I ordered some chow from the Genghis Khan Mongolian restaurant. At least here my luck was changing. It was excellent.
After checking out the next morning, I’m puffing on a cigar, waiting on my driver. He shows up spot on time and I go to snuff my cigar in an outside ashtray.
“That’s OK, Sir’, he tells me, “I don’t mind if you smoke. As long as you don’t mind me.”
“Fair enough,” I tell him, and we sally down the road to the DOI.
Of my three acolytes,
• Albert W. Armstrong. “Al”. University of Missouri, Rolla. Mining geology.
• Charles F. Glaciisto. “Chuck”. New Mexico Tech., Socorro. Mining geology.
• Leonard. R. Paskapää. “Leonard”. Colorado School of Mines. Engineering geology.
Albert and Charles arrived late last night, they drove in. Leonard, as Dr. Muleshoe noted, will arrive later, flying or driving in.
My truck is ready to go as is my trailer. I have my choice of several BLM/DOI motocross and dirt bikes, so I choose a cute little Maico 501, as the bike featured the largest two-stroke single-cylinder engine ever stuffed into a production bike. I figured I’d need all the torque I could get to haul my carcass around.
I receive extra fuel bowsers already pre-mixed with oil for the bike.
I’ve been a rider for years and even though most of my latest motorcycle driving concerns my Indian Super Chief, I’ve ridden dirt for years when I was younger.
I introduce myself to Albert and Charles. We shake hands and they tell me to refer to them as ‘Al’ and ‘Chuck’.
“And you will call me Rock,” I reply.
They were both cool with that.
I ask what vehicles brought them here. Al drove in via a beat-to-shit Volkswagen Van. Chuck drove his International Harvester Super Scout, also beat to death, or close to it.
“Gentlemen,” I say, assaying their field vehicles. “These will not do.”
They both immediately looked unconformable.
“It’s like this,” I relate to them, “I have my GMC 1-ton. It has room for two people, but not two passengers. I’m also towing a trailer, so I don’t want to be weighed down by all your field gear as well.”
They nodded in agreement.
“Let’s have a chat with Sr. Muleshoe,” I suggested, “He might be able to come up with a solution to our problems.”
So we did. The BLM lent us one of their field-kitted out Land Cruiser, a J-70. A boxy, utilitarian vehicle, with an eight-cylinder petrol engine with a five-speed standard transmission.
“Either you two know how to drive a standard shift?” I asked.
They both replied in the affirmative.
Harrumph. Try that today…
“Well, gents,” I said, “We’re burning daylight. We leave as soon as you two get loaded and figure out who’s doing all the stick and rudder work. You can drive together, or one can ride with me. Either way, we leave ASAP and we’ll do orientations and Q&A once we’re in the field. Chop-chop!”
The haul ass to their respective vehicles. They’ll park their rides in the DOI back parking lot for the duration. I go to get my truck and see if the trailer’s hooked back up.
It is and on the rear of the trailer, right above the warning signs for ill-advised tailgaters, is a well-used but still going to be fun as hell Maico 501 dirt bike.
This mission has suddenly taken on a more wholesome and lighthearted mien.
Al and Chuck decide to make the Land Cruise their vehicle and drive together, at least at the beginning. I have no objection and after dispensing the appropriate maps, itineraries, and other documentation, we do a radio check, as the BLM vehicle already had an HF radio.
With that sorted, we head out into the wilderness.
Once out on the streets of Reno, I ask for them to find us a grocery store so we can obtain field provisions for the next week or so. We’ll be out in the sticks, but there are enough little towns scattered about and with two vehicles, we won’t be as isolated as I first thought. I remember to stock up on Charmin Extra-Fluffy.
I mean, we’re not savages here.
We wheel into BinCo foods and invade the store for supplies. Al and Chuck ask what they should buy, as we all have BLM/DOI credit cards for the duration, and I tell them “whatever you want to make for chow”. I explain that I’ll eat just about anything, and am partial to meat, meat, and more meat. I leave them at that and head over to the liquor store down the street.
I have 5 huge coolers in the back of my truck. Two for drinks of all sorts, and three for food.
I obtain some of the necessary outback fluids and several bags of ice.
I ice down all the drinks and wheel back to the grocery store.
Al and Chuck are just emerging. I whistle them over to my truck as it’s going to be the Chuckwagon, no pun intended, on this tour.
We load their selections into the coolers and ice everything that needs icing down. I go into the store and purchase a few items I note they have missed, and place them in the bed of my truck.
I ask if they have everything necessary for a month out in the boonies, and they look to each other, shrug their shoulders, and reply that they think they do.
“OK,” I say, “Either of you armed?” I ask.
“No,” came the reply.
“You will be,” I reply, and ask if there truck’s gassed up.
At the Bumoco station, we fill our vehicles to the top. I check all fluid levels as my blinker light fluid’s been being used profligately lately.
“OK,” I say, “Last chance. Anything you even think you might have forgotten before we head into the wilds? Chapstick? Bug spray? Aloe?”
“No,” they reply, “We think we’re good.”
“All-righty, then,” I reply. “You have your maps, you have your compasses, and you have your vehicle. We will rendezvous at Pinnate Ridge in four hours. Bye.”
I jump into my truck, fire her up, grab a cigar, crank up some Floyd. I head out of the parking lot, generally south.
Both of them just stand there like guppy fish at feeding time.
They both realize I’m not fucking around and scramble back to their vehicle. The last I saw, they were still trying to get it into first gear.
I made it to Pinnate Ridge in 2.5 hours. It’s really very easy to find, even off the road. There are signs everywhere, even out in the sticks. Its prime desert dune and badland riding area, along with several mines on our agenda that are going to be closing down for good.
I arrive and scope out a likely looking camping spot. Nice flat ground, nicely elevated. A not-too-distant outcrop that will be fine for a latrine area. No running water, no trees, no firewood. I expected as much.
I pull to where my truck acts as a windbreak and set up camp.
Well, my camp at least.
Four hours later, I’m slurping a Grape Nehi sitting in my camping chair. I have a fire pit all set up but without fuel. I’m smoking a large cigar and looking through some of the older Mining News magazines. I haven’t seen another person the whole day since we all went off-grid.
Over a crest, I see the BLM Land Cruiser. Well, better late than never, I suppose.
They finally pull into camp, far too close to my truck, their back wheels in the soft sand.
“Gentlemen,” I say, arising from my chair, “Welcome to your first camp. As for your first test, well, more about that later. Let’s make camp, shall we?”
Wordlessly, they set about pitching tents, getting out sleeping bags and the like.
“Gentlemen,” “I ask, “How’s the weather?”
They look at me with blank expressions.
“You have radios in your vehicle, do you not? I suggest you call for an update for the next few days.” I recommend.
Later, “We did, Rock,” Chuck reports, “No rain, hot, with moderate northwesterly winds.”
“OK, good.” I continue, “What do you think of your campsite?”
They look and proclaim it fit.
“Hmmm,” I say, “Parked to the southeast, back wheels off solid rock and in the sand. What happens if a sandstorm kicks up tonight?”
They look, smack themselves collectively in the head, and reposition their vehicle, nose to tail with mine, forming a good windbreak for the entire camp.
“Gents,” I say, “’ Be prepared’. Get used to these words, you’ll be hearing them a lot from now on.”
“Boy,” I say, “I could sure go for a coffee. There’s the pot, here’s the water, and here’s the coffee. There’s the fire pit…”
“Where’s the wood?” Al asks.
“Oh, you didn’t bring any firewood?” I ask.
“No…,” they both say , sheepishly.
“Good thing I did,” I say, motioning to my truck. “Be prepared.”
Over coffee and cigars; well, a cigar for me, Al smokes a pipe, and Chuck is tweaking over Marlboro Reds, I go over the basics of our project:

1. Locate mines.
   
2. Map mines if maps need updating. Some are from the turn of the last century, so yeah, this will almost always be a task.
   
3. Take representative geological samples. This is my own twist on the job.
   
4. Photograph any mine chronological, or unusual, subjects.
   
5. Inspect mines for ‘biologicals’. They’ve already been vetted, but I want to be certain.
   
6. Find and delineate all surficial openings.
   
7. Prepare mine for demolition.
   
8. Wire in, prime, and set charges.
   
9. Run demo wire out of the mine and back to the safety muster area.
   
10. Demolish mine.
    
11. Drink vodka & beer, sleep, repeat.
    
12. There is no #12.
    

“Any questions?” I ask.
Chuck and Al were so busy taking notes, they didn’t have time to formulate any questions.
“OK, guys. Once you get all that, pencils down,” I say.
They finish writing and I see it’s already getting late in the day.
“OK,” I say, “Dinner if you’re hungry. Shall we eat?” I ask.
I decide on dry sausage and beer, as I’m not terribly peckish.
Chuck and Al get the fire going higher and grill up some hot dogs and beans.
Sitting around the campfire as dusk begins to descend, we sit around with our geological desserts. Beers for the guys and a double Rocknocker for me.
Now the drinking lamp’s been lit, we have a chance to chat and get to know each other.
“You guys are still doing dishes tonight,” I remind them.
“Yes, boss man.” They smile.
“OK,” I say, “There are a few things I need to get clear with you. One, I am the hookin’ bull around here. I say ‘jump’, you say ‘how high?’. I’m not too terribly tyrannical, but when playing around with high explosives, your very life might depend on it. Two, I’m the only one licensed to handle the explosives. You’re in training, but you will not go into the lockbox in the back of my truck nor the trailer until I deem you are ready. Violation of this rule is cause for immediate expulsion. And we’ll keep the vehicles. We green?”
To be continued.

BREAKING: TRUMP to delay UK trip -- FIRST IN PLAYBOOK: Aug. recess in jeopardy -- ISENSTADT: MITT shows signs of political revival -- SPOTTED at Mike Shields/Katie Walsh engagement party -- B’DAY: Greta van Susteren
by [email protected] (Daniel Lippman) via POLITICO - TOP Stories
URL: http://ift.tt/2rP8bod
FIRST IN PLAYBOOK -- WE HEAR … There is a chance Congress will stay in session for part of August. There has been political pressure from some members of the House and Senate to stay in town and try to get some things done instead of take a five-week recess. The pressure will only increase if the Obamacare repeal and replace isn’t done in the next few weeks. Congress has just 27 days in session until the summer break. Maybe it's a blessing in disguise: many lawmakers have had to face angry constituents on trips home.
STATEMENTS FROM PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP from Trump National Golf Club in Bedminster, New Jersey -- at 8:22 a.m.: “The #FakeNews MSM doesn’t report the great economic news since Election Day. #DOW up 16%. #NASDAQ up 19.5%. Drilling & energy sector......way up. Regulations way down. 600,000+ new jobs added. Unemployment down to 4.3%. Business and economic enthusiasm way up- record levels!” … at 8:29 a.m.: “I believe the James Comey leaks will be far more prevalent than anyone ever thought possible. Totally illegal? Very ‘cowardly!’” … at 8:49 a.m.: “The Democrats have no message, not on economics, not on taxes, not on jobs, not on failing #Obamacare. They are only OBSTRUCTIONISTS!”
-- TWO QUICK THINGS: Many Democrats will privately agree with Trump that they oftentimes lack a coherent message. But Trump’s presidency has unified Democrats for the first time in a long time … Trump has majorities in the House and Senate, and he’s blaming Democrats for obstructing him.
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BREAKING OVERSEAS -- TRUMP PUTS OFF U.K. VISIT -- THE GUARDIAN: “Donald Trump’s state visit to Britain put on hold: U.S. president told Theresa May he did not want trip to go ahead if there were large-scale public protests”: “Donald Trump has told Theresa May in a phone call he does not want to go ahead with a state visit to Britain until the British public supports him coming. The U.S. president said he did not want to come if there were large-scale protests and his remarks in effect put the visit on hold for some time. The call was made in recent weeks, according to a Downing Street adviser who was in the room. The statement surprised May, according to those present.” http://bit.ly/2reskVQ
Good Sunday morning. Jake will be on Steve Hilton’s new Fox News show “The Next Revolution” live from Los Angeles tonight at 9 p.m. East Coast time.
TRUMP stopped by a wedding at his country club in New Jersey last night. http://bit.ly/2t98Uhy
YOU’LL HEAR THIS QUOTE A LOT -- Donald Trump Jr. on Fox News, via the Washington Post: “‘When he tells you to do something, guess what? There’s no ambiguity in it, there’s no, ‘Hey, I’m hoping,'’ Trump said. ‘You and I are friends: ‘Hey, I hope this happens, but you’ve got to do your job.’ That’s what he told Comey. And for this guy as a politician to then go back and write a memo: ‘Oh, I felt threatened.’ He felt so threatened -- but he didn’t do anything.’ Trump also said that Comey’s testimony ‘vindicated’ the president and that everything in it was ‘basically ridiculous.’” http://wapo.st/2t9eJf5
ALEX ISENSTADT in DEER VALLEY, UTAH -- “Romney stokes speculation he’s weighing another political run: The 2012 GOP nominee is plotting how to help Republicans in the midterms, and he’s being coy about his own political future”: “Mitt Romney is once again testing his political power — critiquing President Donald Trump, raising money and campaigning for fellow Republicans, and not ruling out another run for office for himself. The 2012 GOP nominee is returning to the spotlight, six months after Trump -- the man Romney once savaged as unfit for the presidency -- nearly picked him to be secretary of state. …
“Spencer Zwick, a longtime Romney adviser and political gatekeeper, said he’d been inundated with appeals from Republican candidates asking the former GOP nominee to help them. Last week, Romney held his first fundraiser for a 2018 hopeful, an event benefiting Arizona Sen. Jeff Flake, a Republican who has been fiercely critical of the president. Over the coming days, Romney is also expected to release a robo-call boosting Georgia Republican Karen Handel, who has been losing ground in a high-stakes June 20 special House election she had once been favored to win.
“‘All I can tell you is that the number of requests that Mitt has gotten in the last month to come to a district or to come to a state for a sitting senator — it’s like he’s a presidential candidate again, which I was surprised by,’ said Zwick, who doubles as a top political aide to House Speaker Paul Ryan. ‘There are only so many people in the party that can headline these things.’” http://politi.co/2rZkZ9X
-- THERE IS A BIG DIFFERENCE between Republicans wanting to take advantage of Romney’s fundraising prowess, and his running for office and garnering the support he needs to win.
SUNDAY BEST -- JOHN DICKERSON speaks with SEN. JAMES LANKFORD (R-OKLA.) on CBS’S “FACE THE NATION” -- DICKERSON: “On the question of influencing the investigation, again, thinking about the scale, on the one hand the president might have done something that was a little bit crossing a line but he’s a new guy to the job all the way to this question of obstruction of justice. Where do you put, knowing what you know about the president’s behavior, where do you put what he did on that scale?” LANKFORD: “I would say it’s very inappropriate. As Jim Comey said, it’s awkward to be able to have the president of the United States sitting down with someone in the F.B.I., the leadership of the F.B.I., to be able to have direct questions. And for the issue to come up about the Michael Flynn investigations, inappropriate. But the way that it was handled, with no follow-up, with no other press, with no other return to that topic, it looks like what I called a pretty light touch. If this is trying to interfere in a process of any investigation, it doesn’t seem like it was number one, very effective, and number two, came up more than once in a conversation. So this looks more like an inappropriate conversation than obstruction.”
-- SEN. JACK REED (D-R.I.) tells CHRIS WALLACE on “FOX NEWS SUNDAY” that Trump needs to be deposed on all Russia-related questions -- “[T]he deposition is not just about his conversations with Mr. Comey. There are issues with respect to his conversation with director of national intelligence Dan Coats, Admiral Rogers, the NSA director, his relationships with Manafort. By the time the special prosecutor Mr. Mueller is ready to depose or ask the president to speak under oath, there are a myriad of questions. So what I don’t want to see is simply, we’ll I just said I talk about Comey, I’m not talking about anything else. To resolve this situation he has to be prepared to speak on all these matters.”
-- PREET BHARARA speaks to GEORGE STEPHANOPOULOS on ABC’S “THIS WEEK” -- STEPHANOPOULOS: “The president’s defenders, like Alan Dershowitz, say there’s no grounds for obstruction. You talked about that. And he, in fact, says that presidents have the constitutional right to fire FBI directors and investigations as much as they want. One of the president’s attorneys, Jay Sekulow, is coming up next. He says there’s no there there, no basis for obstruction. You’re a former prosecutor. Are -- is there evidence there ... to begin a case for obstruction?” BHARARA: “I think there’s absolutely evidence to begin a case. I think it’s very important for all sorts of armchair speculators in the law to be clear that no one knows right now whether there is a provable case of obstruction. It’s also true I think from based on what I see as a third party and out of government that there’s no basis to say there’s no obstruction.”
-- SEN. SUSAN COLLINS (R-Maine) talks to BRIANNA KEILAR on CNN’s “STATE OF THE UNION” -- KEILAR: “I want to ask you about something the president has been cagey about, and that is these tapes, of course. So, I wonder if you would support issuing a subpoena to the White House. Right now, it’s just a request coming from Congress. Would you support issuing a subpoena for the recordings or any documents that might come from that?” COLLINS: “This is an issue that the president should have cleared up in his press conference. He should give a straight yes or no to the answer -- to the question of whether or not the tapes exist. And he should voluntarily turn them over not only to the Senate Intelligence Committee, but to the special counsel. So, I don’t think a subpoena should be necessary. And I don’t understand why the president just doesn’t clear this matter up once and for all.”
THE NEXT MAIN EVENT -- “Sessions will testify before Senate in Russia investigation,” by Kyle Cheney and John Bresnahan: “In a letter to his former colleagues in the House and Senate, Sessions canceled a planned appearance before Congress’ appropriations committees. Sessions said he instead plans to appear on Tuesday before the Intelligence panel to respond to questions stemming from FBI director James Comey’s bombshell testimony last Thursday. …
“If this is an open session ... Sessions will likely face a barrage of questions over his role in Comey’s dismissal, his independence from President Donald Trump, and allegations of additional unreported meetings with Russian Ambassador Sergey Kislyak. Sessions has already recused himself from the Russia probe after failing to tell the Senate Judiciary Committee during his confirmation of two meetings with Kislyak, and there have been reports of additional sessions.” http://politi.co/2rOVc5P
-- SEN. DIANNE FEINSTEIN (D-CALIF.) told Brianna Keilar on “State of the Union” that she didn’t know if the hearing will be open.
INQUIRING MINDS WANT TO KNOW -- “What’s next for Comey? Maybe law, corporate work, politics,” by AP’s Eric Tucker: “So what’s next for James Comey? The former FBI director boldly challenged the president who fired him, accused the Trump administration of lying and supplied material that could be used to build a case against President Donald Trump. But after stepping away from the Capitol Hill spotlight, where he’s always seemed comfortable, the 56-year-old veteran lawman now confronts the same question long faced by Washington officials after their government service.
“His dry quip at a riveting Senate hearing that he was ‘between opportunities’ vastly understates the career prospects now available to him — not to mention potential benefits from the public’s fascination with a man who has commanded respect while drawing outrage from both political parties.” http://apne.ws/2sQlkMb
EYE-POPPING NUMBERS FROM WAPO’S KAREN TUMULTY in SANDY SPRINGS, GEORGIA -- “Trump looms over Georgia special election, a proxy battle for 2018”: “It is an arms race of money and organization. The latest fundraising report, filed Thursday, showed Ossoff raising an additional $15 million in the past two months, nearly quadruple what Handel brought in. With outside groups weighing in, the race has thus far cost more than $40 million -- far outpacing the previous record for a congressional race of nearly $30 million for a Florida contest in 2012.
“Polls indicate there are few voters still undecided. ‘The next 10 days are about turning out the base. There are more of us than them in the district. The more people who vote, the better,’ said Corry Bliss, who heads the Congressional Leadership Fund, a super PAC affiliated with House Speaker Paul D. Ryan (R-Wis.). That organization alone plans to spend about $7 million in the race.” http://wapo.st/2rjhPM4
FASCINATING READ -- “Palantir goes from Pentagon outsider to Mattis’ inner circle,” by Jacqueline Klimas and Bryan Bender: “The Trump era has brought a change of fortune for a Silicon Valley software company founded by presidential adviser Peter Thiel — turning it from a Pentagon outcast to a player with three allies in Defense Secretary Jim Mattis' inner circle. At least three Pentagon officials close to Mattis, including his deputy chief of staff and a longtime confidante, either worked, lobbied or consulted for Palantir Technologies, according to ethics disclosures obtained by POLITICO. That’s an unusually high number of people from one company to have such daily contact with the Pentagon leader, some analysts say.
“It also represents a sharp rise in prominence for the company, which just months ago could barely get a meeting in the Pentagon. Last year, Palantir even had to go to court to force its way into a competition for a lucrative Army contract. Thiel was one of the only Silicon Valley titans to openly support Trump during the campaign, a role that gave him a prime speaking slot at last summer’s Republican convention. He has since acted as a key adviser arranging meetings among the president and other tech executives. While there's no evidence he had a direct hand in these specific Pentagon hires, analysts say they absolutely show his growing influence in the administration, where he holds no formal role.” http://politi.co/2sqMdbS
DEMOCRATS’ NEW PLAYBOOK -- “Democrats bet on Trump in Virginia governor’s race,” by Kevin Robillard: “Virginia’s Democratic primary on Tuesday is shaping up to be the first real test of liberalism in the Trump era, with both candidates lurching for increasingly leftward policies to position themselves in contrast with President Donald Trump. …
“Virginia’s gubernatorial elections often develop into contrasts with a new president, but there’s a stark difference between now and how Republican candidate Bob McDonnell handled then-President Barack Obama in 2009. While critical of the Obama's economic record, the future governor also regularly praised Obama for supporting school choice, straddling the partisan divide. The Democrats have felt no need to do the same with the less popular Trump, whose approval rating was at 36 percent in a recent Washington Post-George Mason University poll of Virginia.” http://politi.co/2rjHzYJ
THE LATEST ON HEALTH CARE -- “Fate of Planned Parenthood funding tied to Senate moderates,” by Jen Haberkorn: “Two female Senate Republicans could stop the anti-abortion movement from achieving its most significant win against Planned Parenthood in decades. Most Republicans want to eliminate the group’s $555 million in federal funding as part of their bill to repeal Obamacare. But as Majority Leader Mitch McConnell tries to solve the legislative Rubik’s Cube of finding 50 votes for repeal, he may have to drop the Planned Parenthood cut to win the support of the two Republican moderates, Sens. Susan Collins of Maine and Lisa Murkowski of Alaska.” http://politi.co/2sbbpTf
WHAT SILICON VALLEY IS READING -- “Uber Board to Discuss CEO Travis Kalanick’s Possible Leave of Absence: Board also set to vote on recommendations from a report of an investigation into workplace issues,” by WSJ’s Greg Bensinger: “Uber Technologies Inc. Chief Executive Travis Kalanick will discuss taking a possible leave of absence when the board of directors of the embattled ride-hailing company meets Sunday morning, according to a person familiar with the matter.
“Also on the agenda when the seven-person board convenes is a vote on a series of recommendations from a report prepared by former U.S. Attorney General Eric Holder regarding its workplace. It was uncertain whether Mr. Kalanick would ultimately take the leave or whether the board would approve of such a measure, which would require finding a temporary replacement in short order.” http://on.wsj.com/2r7Ram8
THE JUICE …
-- SPOTTED at Mitt Romney’s E2 Summit in Deer Valley, Utah: New Hampshire Gov. Chris Sununu, Spencer Zwick, Matt Waldrip, Corry Bliss, Speaker Paul Ryan, Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.), Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.), Kristen Soltis Anderson, Ron Kaufman, Rep. Jason Chaffetz (R-Utah), Anthony Scaramucci, Bianna Golodryga, Will Ritter, Mary Bono Mack, Lanhee Chen, Leah Malone and Andrew Liveris.
RIP -- @SecondLady: “Rest in peace Oreo. You touched a lot of hearts in your little life. Our family will miss you very much.” http://bit.ly/2sgQOxR
‘WORKFORCE DEVELOPMENT WEEK’ AT THE WHITE HOUSE -- “Donald and Ivanka Trump head to Wisconsin for jobs push,” by ABC News’ Jordyn Phelps: “President Donald Trump and his daughter Ivanka Trump are set to travel to Wisconsin Tuesday to join Gov. Scott Walker to tour a technical college, as the administration puts a renewed focus on its goal of job creation. The trip is just one event in a week full of activities built around promoting technical skills training and apprenticeships. [They are d]ubbing it ‘workforce development week’ ...
“The president is expected to make what the administration is billing as a ‘major policy speech’ at the Department of Labor on Wednesday, in which he’ll lay out steps the administration will take to encourage workforce development and also call for Congressional action. Ivanka Trump will also lead a roundtable with some 15 CEOs. On Thursday, the president will also host a roundtable discussion, where he will welcome eight governors from states with successful workforce development programs to the White House.” http://abcn.ws/2r7tOwT
THE NEW U.K. POLITICAL REALITY -- “For Britain, Political Stability Is a Quaint Relic,” by NYT’s Steven Erlanger in London: “In a little more than two years, Britain has had two general elections and a nationwide referendum. Each time, the politicians, pollsters, betting markets, political scientists and commentators have got it wrong.
“Once considered one of the most politically stable countries in the world, regularly turning out majority governments, Britain is increasingly confusing and unpredictable, both to its allies and itself. Far from settling the fierce divisions exposed by last year’s referendum on Britain’s exit from the European Union, or Brexit, the election on Thursday only made them worse.” http://nyti.ms/2shhy1i
-- THE POLITICO EUROPE TICK TOCK: “How Theresa May lost it: A reluctance to delegate, hubris and campaigning ineptitude ruined British prime minister’s grand plan to secure a mandate,” by Tom McTague, Charlie Cooper and Annabelle Dickson in London: “Halfway through Britain’s seven-week snap election campaign, some in Theresa May’s team came to the conclusion that they had a problem — the candidate. At a gathering of senior staff in Conservative campaign headquarters in central London, one of May’s top operatives told the sitting prime minister that she risked crashing and burning like Sarah Palin did in 2008. ... To the operative, May was overly controlling and her inexperience would tell during a short, intense campaign. May listened with good grace ... [but] changed nothing.” http://politi.co/2t8VuSG
ACTUAL FAKE NEWS – NYT A22, “A Pro-Trump Conspiracy Theorist, a False Tweet and a Runaway Story,” by Jeremy Peters: “A pro-Trump activist notorious for his amateur sleuthing into red herrings like the ‘Pizzagate’ hoax and a conspiracy theory involving the murder of a Democratic aide, Mr. Posobiec wrote on May 17 that Mr. Comey, the recently ousted F.B.I. director, had ‘said under oath that Trump did not ask him to halt any investigation.’ …
“But as the journey of that one tweet shows, misinformed, distorted and false stories are gaining traction far beyond the fringes of the internet. Just 14 words from Mr. Posobiec’s Twitter account would spread far enough to provide grist for a prime-time Fox News commentary and a Rush Limbaugh monologue that reached millions of listeners, forging an alternative first draft of history in corners of the conservative media where President Trump’s troubles are often explained away as fabrications by his journalist enemies.
“In this fragmented media environment, the spread of false information is accelerated and amplified by a web of allied activist-journalists with large online followings, a White House that grants them access and, occasionally, a president who validates their work. The right-wing media machine that President Bill Clinton’s aides once referred to as ‘conspiracy commerce’ is now far more mature, extensive and, in the internet age, tough to counter.” http://nyti.ms/2sbduPm
DEEP DIVES -- NYT A1, “Opioid Dealers Embrace the Dark Web to Send Deadly Drugs by Mail: Anonymous online sales are surging, and people are dying. Despite dozens of arrests, new merchants — many based in Asia — quickly pop up,” by Nathaniel Popper (print headline: “Drug Trade Rises in Dark Corners of the Internet”): “As the nation’s opioid crisis worsens, the authorities are confronting a resurgent, unruly player in the illicit trade of the deadly drugs, one that threatens to be even more formidable than the cartels. The internet. In a growing number of arrests and overdoses, law enforcement officials say, the drugs are being bought online. Internet sales have allowed powerful synthetic opioids such as fentanyl — the fastest-growing cause of overdoses nationwide — to reach living rooms in nearly every region of the country, as they arrive in small packages in the mail.” http://nyti.ms/2t91CdL
--“China’s New Bridges: Rising High, but Buried in Debt: China has built hundreds of dazzling new bridges, including the longest and highest, but many have fostered debt and corruption,” by NYT’s Chris Buckley: “The eye-popping structures have slashed travel times in some areas, made business easier and generated a sizable slice of the country’s economy, laying a foundation, in theory at least, for decades of future growth. But as the bridges and the expressways they span keep rising, critics say construction has become an end unto itself. Fueled by government-backed loans and urged on by the big construction companies and officials who profit from them, many of the projects are piling up debt and breeding corruption while producing questionable transportation benefits.” http://nyti.ms/2t9er7I
BONUS GREAT WEEKEND READS, curated by Daniel Lippman:
--“Bob Dylan’s Nobel Lecture”: “Some of these same things have happened to you. You too have had drugs dropped into your wine. You too have shared a bed with the wrong woman. You too have been spellbound by sweet voices with strange melodies. You too have come so far and have been so far blown back.” http://bit.ly/2rULMnO
--“How the D-Day Invasion Was Planned” – in the August 1944 issue of Popular Mechanics: “Every one of the thousands of men landed in France required about 10 ship tons of overall equipment, and an additional ship ton every 30 days. The number of separate items needed was about a million. Some of these million items had to be accumulated in millions, resulting in astronomical totals.” http://bit.ly/2smaY97
--“Eternal Champions,” by Sam Borden in ESPN: “Seven months ago, Brazilian underdogs Chapecoense boarded a plane to play in the game of their lives. Instead, their biggest moment turned into a tragedy no one can forget.” http://es.pn/2r9Y3aB (h/t Longform.org)
--“Inside Trump’s secretive immigration court: far from scrutiny and legal aid,” by The Guardian’s Oliver Laughland in Jena, Louisiana: “[T]he remote LaSalle detention facility is part of Trump’s attempt to fast-track deportations. A visit reveals a hastily arranged setup beset by flaws.” http://bit.ly/2scNvHQ
--“Rolling Stone at 50: How Hunter S. Thompson Became a Legend,” by Patrick Doyle in Rolling Stone – per The Browser’s description: “Sports Illustrated asked Hunter S. Thompson for 250 words about a Las Vegas motorbike race. He gave them 2,500 words — and when they spiked the piece he took it to Rolling Stone, which wanted more. The result was Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas, published in 1971. Thompson’s coverage of the 1972 presidential campaign ‘reshaped what it meant to write about politics’. But ‘getting work out of him was becoming difficult”. Editing him ‘was a bit like being a cornerman for Ali.’” http://rol.st/2smiHEk
--“Weddings of the 0.01 Percent,” by Julia Rubin in Racked: “Cristal! Caviar! Chris Martin! How the rich (and sometimes famous) get married.” http://bit.ly/2smtvCz
--“The truth about tarot,” by James McConnachie in Aeon Magazine: “Whether divining ancient wisdoms or elevating the art of cold reading, tarot is a form of therapy, much like psychoanalysis.” http://bit.ly/2sL1XDY (h/t ALDaily.com)
--“The Worst Ever First Day on the Job -- Punching In: My Life as a Long Haul Trucker,” by Finn Murphy in Literary Hub: “Moving companies perform four categories of moving work: local, commercial, long-distance, and international. Callahan’s work was mostly local moving, loading up someone’s house in the morning and then unloading in the afternoon at the new house. It takes the greatest toll on the body because you are handling stuff every working day. It’s the local stuff that eventually kills you or drives you to drink; more commonly, both.” http://bit.ly/2s4Nuoy
--“There Were Once Jews Here,” by Lucette Lagnado, author of “The Man in the White Sharkskin Suit: A Jewish Family’s Exodus from Old Cairo to the New World,” in Tablet Magazine: “During the Six-Day War, some of the Arab countries at war with Israel -- Egypt, Tunisia, Libya -- treated their Jewish populations terribly, causing them to leave en masse.” http://bit.ly/2t92OOk ... $10.01 on Amazonhttp://amzn.to/2sbmAeT
--“Dear Brazilian Government, Thanks for the Contracts,” by Michael Smith, Sabrina Valle, and Blake Schmidt on the cover of Bloomberg Businessweek: “There’s graft, and then there’s the graft machine perfected by Odebrecht, one of the world's biggest construction companies.” https://bloom.bg/2rOEHqr … The coverhttp://bit.ly/2rjKL6H
--“‘Kill them, kill them, kill them’: the volunteer army plotting to wipe out Britain’s grey squirrels,” by Patrick Barkham in The Guardian: “The red squirrel is under threat of extinction across Britain. Their supporters believe the only way to save them is to exterminate their enemy: the greys. But are they just prejudiced against non-native species?” http://bit.ly/2re8OE6
--“This County Switched From Backing Obama to Trump. Here’s What Happened,” by Josh Siegel in The Daily Signal: “In 1980, manufacturing jobs comprised 38 percent of all jobs in Coos [New Hampshire]. In 2014, only 7 percent of jobs in the county were in manufacturing. Payroll wages from manufacturing have dropped from 49 percent to 9 percent since the mid-1980s.” http://bit.ly/2sL2A0v
SPOTTED: Secretary of Homeland Security John Kelly enjoying “DHS Night” Friday night at the Nats game along with members of DHS’ workforce – pic http://bit.ly/2rjyfUM... Anson Kaye, partner at GMMB, in New Orleans last night, accepting a Gold ADDY award (and also a Mosaic Award) for the ad “Mirrors” (http://bit.ly/2sbAIEM) he created for Hillary for America
SPOTTED at State Department senior White House adviser Matt Mowers’ birthday party at Wet Dog Tavern last night (which coincidentally also hosted RNC alum Anna Epstein’s birthday party at the same time): Cassie Spodak, Ryan Williams, Zeke Miller, Ben Sparks, Jill Barclay, Phil Elliott, Ethan Zorfas, Ben DeMarzo, Maren Kasper, Michael Kratsios, Kailani Koenig, Tom Dickens, Elise Dietsch Dickens, Eric Jones, Alan He, Andy Polesovsky, Corey Ershow, Kelly Klass, Britt Carter.
SHIELDS/WALSH ENGAGEMENT PARTY -- THE BRITISH EMBASSY hosted an engagement party last night for Mike Shields, former RNC chief of staff and founder and partner at Convergence Media and Katie Walsh, former WH deputy chief of staff and former RNC chief of staff who is now senior advisor at America First Policies. Amb. Kim Darroch toasted the pair and called them the “ultimate political couple” and told the crowd how the couple got engaged in the Cabinet Room at 10 Downing Street, where the prime minister has met with his or her cabinet every week for 250 years. He also needled Mike, who has a British mother and is a big soccer fan, for supporting Ipswich, who he cast as much inferior to Chelsea in the Premier League. The food at the party included: herb-crusted fillet of lamb, goat’s cheese and beetroot, terrine of pork, and chili shrimp while desserts included mini Bakewell tart, strawberry tartlet and passion fruit mousse. Pics of the couplehttp://bit.ly/2sbk3Bp … http://bit.ly/2saWbhk … Reince Priebus taking a pic of the couple as they thanked friends for coming http://bit.ly/2rOGmfz … The crowdhttp://bit.ly/2rOzjDs
SPOTTED: Reince and Sally Priebus, Sean and Rebecca Spicer, Steven Mnuchin and his chief of staff Eli Miller chatting on a walk around the gardens of the embassy, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, Rob and Cindy Simms, Cara Mason, Jessica Ditto, Sarah and Dave Armstrong, Tim Pataki, Richard Walters, Rob Jesmer chatting with Sean Cairncross (Sean and Rob have been friends since they were 5 years old growing up in Minnesota), Brian O. Walsh, Josh Pitcock, Mike’s 15-year-old son Aidan Shields-Eads, Molly Donlin, Steven Law, Sam Feist, Mike Allen, Andrew Bremberg, Lew Eisenberg, Madeleine Westerhout, Johnny DeStefano, Renee Hudson, Michael Hoare, Lindsay Walters, Vanessa Morrone and Mike Ambrosini, Zach and Mallory Hunter.
ENGAGED --Andrew Feldman, principal of the progressive communications firm Feldman Strategies, proposed to his longtime girlfriend Megan Salzman Saturday night during Country Music Fest in Nashville. Megan is a communications manager at the early education advocacy group The First Five Years Fund. “Andrew and Megan met on OKCupid nearly four and a half years ago. Andrew points out that the ring has extra significant because the center stone was Megan’s mother’s engagement stone and she is no longer with us.” Pics http://bit.ly/2r7KrIZ ... http://bit.ly/2rOFJTb … The ringhttp://bit.ly/2rjzLGh
-- Jessica Huff, social media director for McClatchy in Dallas and a Politico alum, and Spenser Walters, an area sales rep for Duvel USA, got engaged on Friday night in Austin, Texas. She emails us: “We met in college at UT-Austin after he came back from Afghanistan. He was serving in the Marines. We had the same group of friends but I hadn’t met him yet since he was overseas. Once he was back, one of our first dates was at a restaurant in the hill country in Texas overlooking the lake, and so while visiting Austin he took me back there and proposed during sunset. It’s a very special place to us so it was perfect!” Picshttp://bit.ly/2shqCmX … The ringhttp://bit.ly/2t9rnKO
WEEKEND WEDDINGS -- Travis Considine, communications manager at Uber Texas and a John McCain and Rick Perry alum, married Morgan Smith, a reporter with The Texas Tribune, on Saturday evening at the San Antonio Museum of Art. Guests enjoyed a bluegrass band and flawless weather at the outdoor ceremony and reception. Pichttp://bit.ly/2t9jc1c … Travis’ speechhttp://bit.ly/2sQLqi2
SPOTTED: Tucker and Alexia Bounds, Brittany Bramell, Trevor Theunissen, Chris Miller, Allie Brandenburger and Ryan Mahoney, Kevin Benacci, Emily Ramshaw, Matt and Jen Hirsch, Evan Smith, Perrylanders Rob Johnson, Mark Miner, and Andy Hemming.
OBAMA ALUMNI – Meredith Carden, head of partnerships at Sidewire, got married this weekend to Micah Fergenson, law clerk at U.S. Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit, in a small ceremony at Four Follies Farm in Tiverton, Rhode Island. The couple first met in 2009 when they were working for President Obama. Micah worked in the WH Counsel’s Office, and Meredith worked for FLOTUS in the East Wing. They lost touch, but were reintroduced by a mutual friend in 2015. Pichttp://bit.ly/2sb3PIq
--“Lily Rothman, Elihu Dietz” – N.Y. Times: “Ms. Rothman, 31, is the history and archives editor at Time magazine, overseeing its history coverage, Life.com and the magazine’s digital archive. She also wrote ‘Everything You Need to Ace American History in One Big Fat Notebook.’ She graduated magna cum laude from Yale and received a master’s degree in journalism from the City University of New York. ... Mr. Dietz, 32, is a candidate for a master’s degree in environmental management at the Nicholas School of the Environment at Duke, where he studies the integration of renewable energy into the grid. He graduated from St. John’s College in Santa Fe, N.M. ... The groom is a great-great-grandson and a namesake of Elihu Root, who was President Theodore Roosevelt’s secretary of state and the winner of the Nobel Peace Prize in 1912. He is also a direct descendant of President Ulysses S. Grant. The couple met on a blind date arranged by friends in Brooklyn in 2011.” With pic http://nyti.ms/2rZpO2N
--“Alison Kenworthy, Michael Koenigs”: “The bride and groom work at ABC News in New York, where they met. She is a news producer for ‘Good Morning America.’ He is a senior coordinating producer, creating content that is used on-air and on the website. He was also the host of ‘Election Cycle,’ a series in 2016 that featured him bicycling through swing states and interviewing voters along the way. The bride, 33, graduated from Rutgers. ... Mr. Koenigs, 30, graduated cum laude from Harvard.” With pichttp://nyti.ms/2t8GB2L
--“Julia Pudlin, David Wishnick”: “Ms. Pudlin, 32, worked until earlier this year at the United States Treasury Department as a deputy executive secretary in the chief of staff’s office and a senior adviser to the general counsel. On July 10 she is to begin working as the assistant deputy general counsel for government investigations at Comcast in Philadelphia. She graduated summa cum laude from Yale, and received a law degree magna cum laude from the University of Pennsylvania. ... Mr. Wishnick, also 32, was until recently an associate in the Washington office of Jenner & Block, a Chicago law firm. On July 12 he is to begin a fellowship, conducting research in contract law, at the University of Pennsylvania Law School. He graduated magna cum laude from Brown, and received a law degree from Yale. ... The couple met in April 2013 through the dating app Hinge.” With pichttp://nyti.ms/2rOZSIV
--“Victoria St. Martin, Richard G. Jones”: “The bride, 36, is a general assignment reporter on the local desk of The Washington Post. She graduated from Rutgers and received a master’s degree in journalism from American University. ... The groom, 46, is to become the director of the journalism program at Notre Dame. Until recently, he was an associate editor in news administration for The New York Times, as well as the director of the newspaper’s Student Journalism Institute. He graduated from the University of Delaware and has a master’s degree in journalism from Columbia. ... The couple were introduced in 2006 by a mutual friend in Yardley, Pa.” With pichttp://nyti.ms/2rOtYMA
BIRTHDAYS: Greta Van Susteren, the pride of Appleton, Wisconsin (hat tip: Tammy Haddad) ... Tad Devine, the pride of Providence who lives on Block Island, is 62 ... Kim Oates of the House Radio/TV gallery … Carrie Budoff Brown’s older sister, Jennifer Budoff, budget director for the D.C. City Council ... former Rep. Charles Rangel (D-N.Y.) is 87 … Lindsey Williams Drath ... Jennifer Rubin ... Michael Timmeny, SVP for government and community relations at Cisco ... Jeremy Ben-Ami, president at J Street (h/ts Jon Haber) ... POLITICO’s Reid Pillifant, Emily Dobler and Juliette Medina ... South Dakota Gov. Dennis Daugaard is 64 ... Treasury alum David Cohen ... TJ Adams-Falconer, associate director of external affairs at Axios ... Rep. Mike Conaway (R-Tex.) is 69 ... Cesar Gonzalez, COS for Rep. Mario Diaz-Balart ... former Rep. Rick Renzi (R-Ariz.) is 59 ... DNC comms staffer and former HRC campaign media booker Lucas Acosta (h/t Crystal Carson) ...
... Will Rahn, managing editor for politics at CBS News digital, is 3-0 ... Jessica Franks, gov’t affairs representative for Halliburton ... Politico Europe’s Tanit Parada Tur ... Chris Campbell, Republican staff director at Senate Finance ... Kristina Edmunson ... Rachel Ruskin ... Obama alum Jonathan McBride, now a managing director at BlackRock … Mike Schoenfeld, the Blue Devils’ master of public affairs/Duke’s other Mike … Betsy Gotbaum, former NYC public advocate, is 79 ... Matt Chaban, policy director at Center for an Urban Future ... Mary Kate Cunningham ... Salesforce’s Tom Gavin, an Obama WH OMB alum … Michael Froehlich ... Caroline Barker ... Matthew Campbell ... Vanessa Chan, corporate comms. at Facebook ... Kelly Danielka Peirson ... Google’s Ramya Raghavan ... Tom Alexander, COO at 1871 Chicago and a Rahm alum ... Jacque Vilmain, the pride of Eagle Grove, Iowa(h/t Teresa) ... animal rights activist Ingrid Newkirk is 68 ... Power Playbooker Dr. Oz is 57 ... actor Hugh Laurie is 58 ... Shia LaBeouf is 31 (h/ts AP)

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Date: 2013-06-16
Link to submission (Has self-text)

Questions	Answers
What's you're best story about someone trying to con/steel from the casino?	I figure you're looking for some kind of crazy Oceans 11 story (of which there are several in the industry but none on my watch), but honestly the best ones are people trying to steal from the fucking buffet.
	Mom comes in with two kids and says they're not eating so she shouldn't have to pay. The cashier says OK.
	Fast forward 15 minutes and the cashier notices that the kids are missing.
	THE FUCKING MOTHER IS FEEDING THEM UNDER THE TABLE LIKE FUCKING DOGS.
Best AMA response ever. have an upvote!	We had set out in the foyer those bags for your umbrella so the floor doesn't get wet.
	Lady takes one, goes to the buffet, and starts filling it with food. Brazenly. Not trying to hide it.
	We stop her and she says "what? this is all you can eat?!"
"Sit down and eat the contents of the bag then..."	We found a HUGE ziplock bag of food by a table. The "customer" had obviously left it behind.
	She realized she forgot it and came back to get it about 30 minutes later.
You should hire me as a buffet monitor i can pose as a customer then obnoxiously call them out for stuffing their purses with chicken fingers and mashed potatoes w/gravy. "HEY FAT LADAYYY I SEE YOU STEALIN THEM CHIKKAN FINGAZ!"	Have a lady who consistently bitches about having to pay full price since she can't consume a lot because of her gastric bypass.
Do you actually have a policy to ask people to leave if you feel they lost more than they can afford? i watched a piece by loius theroux once where he asked this question to some of the managers of a casino and they all said "oh, i know they can afford it, of course we would ask them to stop if they couldnt". but obviously, from a business perspective, this is counter-intuitive towards making profits. so what is your take on this whole thing? and what is the overhead like for running a casino? what are some expenses you have which may be surprisingly high?	We never make judgment on whether or not they can afford it. We really only step in if they come to us or start doing something overt like begging for money or asking for loans, etc. In the macro view, it's very bad for business if we don't do something about problem gambling when it presents itself.
	Overhead... EBITDA margin of 30% is great.
	Expenses... I guess crab legs would be too obvious? Besides that, maybe table games labor. You have a 0.5% house advantage at blackjack and have to have a physical person here 24/7 plus a supervisor for every 5-6 games.
What games are the biggest money makers for the casino? and coincidentally, Ace, ever ran a sports book?	Penny slots by far.
	Ha. No. But have worked in casinos that have them.
But why do I always win/come out ahead max-betting on the fucking Sex and the City penny slot?	Google "law of large numbers"
1) How do you like the city? (So many people hate on it, and I don't understand why). Also, how did you like UNLV and when were you there?	1.) I actually just moved away for a job. I just think Vegas is OK. I moved there when I was in my mid-20s with a decent job so it was cool and exciting then. Fast forward a decade or so and the allure isn't there anymore. It's not "home" and I don't think it will ever will be because of how transient the population is.
2) to me it seems like a pretty small about of locals gamble (at least at the strip properties), do you guys keep tabs on those numbers? If so, what is the ratio of your gambling customers?	2.) I don't have the numbers in front of me, but we did a study one time and showed that Vegas has the highest incidence of regularly gambling activity in the nation. I always just felt that was a function of accessibility and self selection on the part of the residents. But you're right that locals don't go to the strip. The marketing offers are terrible compared to the non-strip properties and it's a pain to get to the strip just to get your gambling fix.
To what extent is organized crime still present in or around the casinos? Any personal encounters?	Virtually none AFAIK.
	The industry is very, very heavily regulated. When you get to the executive ranks you have to go through very, very thorough background checks. 5 years of tax returns, 5 years of all cancelled checks, explanations of all withdrawals > $200 and deposits > $500, in depth interview with an agent, etc.
	The last time I've heard of legit organized crime here in the states (places like Macau are an entirely different story) was in Rosemont, IL I think in the mid-90s.
	Link to casinoconnectionac.com
Damn, all withdrawals over $200? For the past 5 years? "Uh, I dunno, I don't really remember why I withdrew $300 from an ATM 3 years ago. Maybe I spent it buying some off of Craig's List, I dunno."	Yeah, it's really ridiculous.
Explain Macau?	The Triad are heavily influential there. Kind of like what you'd imagine in Vegas in the 50s.
Holy shit, I live in Des Plaines.	Des Plaines' only problem now is how to more quickly count all the money they're making
The scene from Skyfall comes to mind.	Yep.
Organized crime is the muscle of the casino, the security guards, the directors of security, the private investigators, the small business owners, the gamblers who launder money through the casinos. Of course the mob isn't like the movies anymore.	Well i'm going to have to respectfully disagree with you on everything except the money laundering despite the fact we have to live by Title 31 Link to en.wikipedia.org
It is true that if a person is on a helluva winning streak and is consistantly winning and you cant figure out why... you will demand that he take his winnings and leave and never show his face in the place again? (kick him out for winning).	It's possible but relatively rare. you have to have enough cash to really turn out our lights to get to that point. for the vast vast majority of people, we have more money than you so as long as feel like we can get you back in the door, go ahead and win away
So that scene in Rain man is totally bullshit then? Where they consistently win and make $80,000 from a couple of thousand... then are told to GTFO after the casino guys couldnt figure out how they were doing it.	Bullshit only in the sense that couldn't figure out what was going on
What gives a person the best odds when playing Blackjack-playing with more decks or less decks? i seem to win more with tables that use 6 decks and my friends do better with 4 decks..	It's a lot more than the number of decks and the casinos use that information asymmetry to their advantage (e.g., $5 SINGLE DECK BLACKJACK!!!) Everything being the same, the less amount of decks the better but we will change the payouts for BJ, rules for splitting and double down, etc. to our advantage. So you can have a 6-deck shoe with otherwise very liberal rules that have a lower house advantage than a single deck show with very unfavorable rules.
So with the same set of rules, less decks is more favourable?	Yes everything else being equal
Is that just because it's easier to count or is it fancy math stuff.	Fancy math stuff.
	USING FEWER DECKS.
	Six Decks: -0.02% Five Decks: -0.03% Four Decks: -0.06% Two Decks: -0.19% One Deck: -0.48%
	Link to www.onlineblackjack.com
Ever seen anyone get naked or have sex in the casino or bathrooms?	Boobs pop out of the cocktail waitresses' uniforms relatively often because they'll get tops 3 sizes too small in order to get bigger cleveage/tips.
	Saw chick blowing a dude at a slot machine at the entrance of a club.
	And Vegas has all of these European-style pools so if you're out there "inspecting the grounds" then all those girls are topless.
Sweet. What'd you do with the BJ couple? Pic of one of the pools please?	Security was running towards them so I just assumed they got the boot.
	Pools = just go to imagefap and look for topless beaches.
Do you ever feel guilty for all the money people lose to your business?	Of course.
Did you see the fictional series "Tilt" on ESPN about 5-7 years ago? Any opinions on it? Did you find it entertaining? Did you find any of it accurate at all?	Vaguely. And when I say that I mean I remember the series and watching a bit of it and that's it.
	To us, the holy grail of Casino movies is Casino and Rounders.
Thanks for the response! I love Rounders, but it seemed to focus more on the players, and more on non-casino-based games, whereas Tilt was as much about the casino management as anything else. I should watch Casino.	Yeah if you're interested in the casino management piece then Casino.
Does your casino make any efforts to stop problem gamblers from betting more than they can afford?	Every casino company has policies regarding problem gambling that are audited by the state. Each state also has its own minimum guidelines like mandating that brochures be placed in very visible areas of the casinos, hotline numbers printed on every ad, etc.
	It's a delicate situation when you think someone might have a problem because, well it might not be a problem. So we generally only do things if they specifically ask us to (e.g., they can ban themselves) or if they start doing something really egregious like asking players or employees for loans at which point we'd probably pull them aside and hand them a brochure and ask if there's anything we can do to help because what they're currently doing is unacceptable (the begging).
There's a casino near my house that keeps a full time car appraiser on staff. I've always felt that's a little shady. You ever run into anything like that?	No way.
Even though I believe casino gambling should be legal, I find the practice of casino's providing credit to be morally indefensible. What is your opinion on the practice? Would it be a reasonable compromise to allow for more casinos on the stipulation that gambling on a margin is banned?	So if I'm a high worth individual who likes to gamble, your expectation is that I just bring in a suitcase of $100s to gamble with?
No, a debit card.	Reasonable.
A debit card? not reasonable...a credit limit is the only feasible way some patrons can gamble...most people do not want to walk around with 50k in there pocket...and I'm not sure how you would go about withdrawing thousands of dollars from an ATM machine.	I was being sarcastic. It's a huge competitive disadvantage to not be able to offer credit (e.g., Missouri) because no high roller wants to play there. You'd have to physically go to the bank, withdraw 20K cash or whatever, somehow survive walking to your car, and then somehow survive walking to the casino from your car. TBF, there's also what is called front money which is where you can wire money to us and we will hold it for you but you have to pay the fees vs us offering you credit free. I did have a millionaire player who strictly got his money off of a variety of credit cards and would just do cash advances. We obviously never questioned it but he had apparently had a huge credit line (evidenced by the amount he was able to withdraw) and enough to pay it back (evidenced by him able to come often).
notjabba...no one cares if "you believe casino gambling should or shouldn't be legal"
How do you know if i am card counting, and do you care if i am not playing for big money?	Primarily odd fluctuations in your betting patterns. $5, 5, 5, 5, then $1,000, then $5, 5, 5, 5 would catch our eye big time.
, big money!	We care. Small wins add up.
What if i went 5,5,5,20? Would you care then?	At those low levels no one would be on the lookout for you.
How automated is the alerting system for this? Pit boss getting info from the sky I assume?	Not very automated. There are a variety of technologies out there designed to thwart this but they're expensive and casinos are too staid to invest.
	So basically it's just either surveillance or the pit supervisor noticing something odd then starting to keep track of the bets.
Might be a silly question, but does stuff ever go down like it does in the movies? Like, say some guy is cheating in one way or another or doesn't take a hint to leave. Is he going to get taken into a back room and get his ass kicked or just escorted out? Taking fingers, breaking knee caps etc. etc.	Nah, too highly regulated these days.
At what point do you start looking for card counters? If I'm playing with a $50-200 bet spread am I noticeable? Is the the spread (4:1, 8:1, 20:1) the dollar figure or a combination?	Sorry this isn't my area of expertise so I can't with this level of specificity. I'd think a 4X spread wouldn't be bad, though, but just an educated guess.
	You could buy a membership to the Green Chip forum (bj21.com), though and read up on the reverse engineering they've done.
I would venture a guess that electronic card games have pattern recognition built right in?	I don't know how they do the shuffle. I'd imagine it's a fresh shuffle before every hand like in video poker thus nullifying counting.
Well I understand that, but profits on a casino are through the roof, are they not? I assume that there is a relatively low amount of card counters , and that you still will make a very good profit.	Profits aren't as good as you'd think post 2008 economy.
	Bottom line is that it ain't ever gonna happen. Sorry.
What is the biggest amount you have seen someone lose?	I was working at Wynn when Andy Beal played "The Corporation" so that was like $16.5MM he lost to them I believe.
That's fucking cool, I read the book detailing the events of this, Link to en.m.wikipedia.org. Any cool stories etc from your point of view from then?	Honestly, everything I found out about it at the time was from 2+2. I didn't have direct access to the players so it wasn't really like I could analyze the session with Phil afterwards.
Urban legends of someone winning big at the slots but having it taken away to a glitch. Has this really happened to your knowledge?	Not urban legend. Many cases like this. The player never wins. Google it and you'll find tons of them. E.g.,
	Link to www.lasvegassun.com
	This one is international but I think is the funniest. Not only did you "win" $55MM on a machine that stated the max jackpot was $50K but after winning $55MM, you went ahead and played another spin... just in case...
	Link to www.thanhniennews.com
Damn that sucks. Well here is one for you. Did you know that in Panama you can double down at the black jack tables at any point. It gives you a huge advantage and you can win a lot of money that way.	I'd heard something like that. My best friend (avid gambler) went to Costa Rica and basically came back saying he had to totally re-learn BJ when he was down there because of all of their crazy rules.
	If that's true about Panama, I'm surprised there aren't people haven't just set up shop down there and pillaged that place until they went bust.
No i didnt have sex with the hooker but my friend did make out with her drunk.	As would I. What's up with fucking people who just make out? Fucking amateur hour. This isn't fucking 7th grade.
He didn't know that she was a hooker and was just putting the moves on her. He thought he was just really smooth with his broken spanish. What he didn't know what that I paid her to keep quiet about it. He looked REALLY sad when someone else bought her and he realized what she was.	I actually did something similar for my friend after he split up with his whore wife. We wanted to boost his spirits so gave a hooker $100 to go and flirt with him.
Shit man in Panama you can get a lot more than flirting for a hundo. Granted she won me a grand and i think i threw her 50 back. Well that and she got to make out with my friend...Worth it. Did your friend end up with the hooker hilarious movie style?	Nah, this was in Vegas, he's cheap, and we're not that generous.
How do Vegas casinos differ from Native American casinos? Or are they essentially the same?	Depends in the jurisdiction. in some there is no difference (e.g florida) while others are wildly different (e.g north Carolina)
I'm curious as to how they differ. I'm from NC but haven't been to any of the casinos around here.	In NC, for example, games have to be "games of skill" so like on the slot machines you don't just pull the handle and watch the reels go round and round, you have to physically touch the game to stop each reel.
That's not true (I've been there).	Admittedly it's been awhile since I've dealt with them (I used to work for Harrah's) but it was like that for awhile.
	Link to wizardofodds.com (scroll down a bit)
They might have some that are like that, but the handful I played (there are a shit ton) were not. Apparently they've got table games there now, too, which is new from when I was last there just a year ago.	Well the states quickly understand that they're leaving money on the table (no pun intended) but creating this arcane regulations.
Fastest growing casino region? AC? Vegas? Macau?	Macau.
	Absolutely nothing domestically.
Why? Distance to the large volume of middle and wealthy chinese?	Yes, and whose culture has a high propensity for gambling.
Why isn't counting cards allowed? Lets say I was a math genius, isn't it just part of the game then?	Because we reserve the right to serve whomever we please as long as we're not discriminatory against a protected class.
I see. It just seems like mocking people for being good. Maybe if I was a black math genius with down syndrome I could get along with it. No offense to either btw.	Perhaps but we're not particularly concerned.
	Btw, I'm a bit of an advantage gambler myself. I only play low house advantage games, maximize my coupons and promotions etc. so I'm sympathetic but there's just nothing that can be done on the card counting front.
Private business CAN discriminate based on protected classes, just bad business to do so.	Then don't come to my casino.
Semi-serious question: have you ever crashed someone's hand with a hammer because he/she was found cheating?	Boy do I wish, but no.
Could you explain why it is so difficult to get casinos in states that do not already have them? Im from Dallas, and it seems that the Oklahoma casinos are 70%+ Texans. It seems our state is losing a ton of $ to other states. (Oklahoma, Louisiana...)	In Texas it's because your legislature meets relatively irregularly. expansion since the 90s has been predicated on budget shortfalls and using gaming to patch up those holes.
	Texas' economy has been relatively good so combine that with a conservative legislature that doesn't meet often as we'd have have to have the perfect storm of you having a bad economic run at the same time the legislature is meeting.
	Trust me, we are ready to pounce when that happens.
Okay so a couple of years ago there was a show called "Las Vegas" and it was about a casino.	Hosts are basically your sales team to high worth players. The compensation structure is just like any other salesperson: base + commission.
Not sure if you ever saw it, but there was a character named Sam and she was a casino hostess and she was kind of a bitch but I always wanted to be that (casino host not bitch). How can I get into that?	So, if you've never done that kind of work before or sales at all for that matter, you just need to take anykind of remotely similar job and then just keep trying to plug along with the job search.
Well I cant wait until it happens. I will gladly donate my fair share for a free Paula Dean buffet.	We've owned land for decades in preparation.
	You see where companies like PENN have already bought stakes in racetracks there, taking a bet that racinos (adding slots to tracks) will be the states first foray.
The owner of Landry's (also owns the Nugget) has said repeatedly that as soon as the law is passed he can have working slots in Galveston overnight.	Yeah. His family (Fertitta) started Stations casinos in Vegas (and MMA) and really big shots in town.
Yeah, as a Houstonian and gambler, I am really hoping one day it finally happens. I hate hate HATE driving to Louisiana and I haven't been able to make it out to Vegas in 2+ years.	The folks in Lake Charles and Shreveport do not share your sentiment.
I'm sure they don't. Bud of mine wanted to make an ad campaign of just going to Isle of Capri and showing the license plates.	You mean Pile of Debris.
Highest progressive payout you've ever seen paid out? And what was the game? And any good stories about throwing out patrons?	That I've physically seen? Probably like a $75K Caribbean Stud.
I have been encouraged by many people to get a job there, but no one, even me, knows where I should start. Personally, I don't enjoy gambling and have only been in the Hard Rock a couple times, just to see the lobby and buy shirts with some out of town guests.	Probably on the non-gaming side. Not sure of your educational background but NA with degrees go very, very far very, very quickly.
So my question is where would you recommend someone to start in the casino industry, if they don't particulary like/understand gambling?	If you want to work the front line, then hotel front desk or something like that.
I don't have a degree yet, but I do have 10 years in B2B (business to business) sales in telephony, so I know a lot about circuits/phone systems/general telecom.	Native American.
EDIT: what does "NA" stand for?	So then in your case either work in IT or maybe some kind of sales position like convention sales?
Oh I didn't know there would be some sort of sales team with a casino. Sweet. I considered IT, but I assumed it would be in the realm of network security, which I know little to nothing about.	Who do you think maintains the phone switch, PCs, servers, etc.?
Proof?	What would suffice without outing me?
You would know best what you have, however this sounds like it would be easier to prove confidentially to the mods. Things such as work ID, paystub, business card, etc are acceptable forms of confidential verification.	I'll send a pic over to them. Never done this before so wasn't sure.
I have a BA in Accounting and am currently a Project Manager (Prior exp in Cost, Tax and Accural accounting, worked for the Big 4, Now I make Warheads for the Army). If I wanted to get into the Casino industry what jobs should I persue. What is the best way to persue them? Do people telecommute? Whats the pay range?	We always need good finance people. There are always other industries they can work in so it's hard to find good people.
	So I'd say just go be an accountant?
	We post on all the major job boards and casinocareers.com is the main industry-specific job board.
	Telecommuting is not a regularly accepted practice.
	For finance, it's just market rate salary.
How did you get your job?	Was in undergrad and needed a job. responded to ad in paper for entry level job. worked my way up.
I'm going to guess that wasn't a typo.	Not going to edit for the lulz.
You know what, why the hell not? Best way to make money fast?	Well, assuming you have one and only one bet to make, the math always says banker on baccarat.
Any tips/secrets for slot machine players? Which one's your favorite type/brand?	Learn to play video poker, blackjack, baccarat, or craps.
Anything video scares me..are there 'rules' in place for video poker or Bj blackjack to guarantee payouts or is it completely random? If random, how do we know the game isn't rigged in your favor?	Completely Random.
	Because it behooves the state not to let us rig the games so they employ strict regulations to prevent such.
	For example, many states mandate that this company verify the legitimacy of a game: Link to www.gaminglabs.com
	Those states that don't, do it themselves.
I accidently got my gf addicted to video poker but it paid well. Its a better chance and payoff than video slots IMO.	No opinion about it, it is true.
Does this only go for high roller tables? Or does it also go for some guy that hits a big jackpot on the slots?	Both.
Are security as horrible as people say in Vegas? I've heard from my relatives that purse snatching and such happens quite a bit and security shows up minutes after they were called (so pretty much useless). On the other hand, I've heard some amazing quick response time in Macau. Are these myths?	Need some reference point. Horrible as compared to what. You've got a 3-mile long street with literally a million people on it. There's gonna be crime.
Hmmm... how about relative to san diego or fort worth?	I'd say on par to Gaslamp but I'm no criminologist.
HOW DO YOU SLEEP AT NIGHT!? I'm serious, I want the gritty details... You use a sleep number? Memory foam? Standard matress with some box springs? And what kind of pillow to. Oh, oh, and what is the thread count of your sheets...	I'm a minimalist. Same mattress I've had for literally 15 years that I got at a department store. Hypoallergenic pillows from Target. 800 count. Also from Target.
Nice! Glad I registered my wedding at Target. Sounds like they got the good stuff.	Decent and reasonably priced. The girls can't tell the difference between it and the really nice stuff.
Counting cards actually means that you are playing the game very well and it isn't cheating. How can you justify kicking someone out of a casino for being too good at the game? Also as far as I'm aware it isn't illegal.	No it is not illegal but just like any other business we reserve the right to serve whomever we please (as long as we're not discriminating against a protected class, of course).
	In essence you are keeping track of how many 10s/face cards and low cards are in the deck because high cards help the player, low cards help the dealer.
	So if you know that the deck is rich in high cards you bet more and vice versa.
I will be attending UNLV for hospitality management in the fall. any tips?	For undergrad? Make the program what you want out of it. Just by graduating no one is going to hand you a huge job but if you do well the brand recognition can really work in your favor.
Yep for undergrad. thanks for the answer!	Go Rebels!
Does your business invest in gambling addictions or have employee training to prevent those who are gambling addicts from playing in your casino?	I take it you mean gambling addiction treatment... And yes, we do: Link to www.americangaming.org
	And every employee, at least in the majority of casinos, is trained on how to identify problem gaming.
How do you hire trust worthy people, meaning do you have some dude or gal that is like HR on steroids watching people? I imagine you have seen more than one case where there is employee theft or people who are running a front for money laundering?	Well everyone goes through a background check through the state with fingerprints and whatnot then executives go through an FBI-style background check where they check all of your bank records and stuff.
	But with so much cash floating around there is theft but it's basically like a bank so I can't imagine the incidence to be much higher than with tellers at banks.
How much do you make?	Six figures + bonus.
Awesome. What was your path to this career choice? Like education/jobs.	I just happened into it. Got entry level job during undergrad and worked my way up. Picked up master's while working.
Nice. Went to school for business I presume?	For my master's yes. Have doo doo lib arts degree for undergrad.
Awesome! So you managed to get the entry level job with just an arts degrees then worked your way up? Or was the MBA necessary for where you are at now?	I was in undergrad I got the job. It as entry level. $10/hr.
	Master's not necessary but very helpful to stick out of the crowd.
Just noticed your name...classic. At around what limits are you able to get comps for free rooms out in either AC or Vegas? I would assume that Vegas is easier due to the vast amount of rooms, but what are your tips to earning comps faster?	Depends on the property and depends on the game. And by rooms, do you mean like direct mail offers or the ability to walk up to someone and say "bitch, I'm a baller - hook me up!"
What do you know of online gambling?	I did a bunch of preliminary work when I was a corporate person.

Last updated: 2013-06-21 00:10 UTC
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